Author Topic: Acceptance issues  (Read 7137 times)

Offline jdavis

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jdavis,
Has anyone any advice about getting over these issues?
Thanks.

You didn't mention wife or GF so I assume you are not with a woman.I am 70 and my wife gave me my first 2 bras. I was really self conscious at first thinking what others might think. The way I got over that I wore a bra all my awake time and still do. Don't shy away from hugs. Some will rub back and forth across bra strap, don't worry some will ask. Be straightforward and say it's a bra, I have grown breasts and need support.
I have been wearing a bra about 6  years now and never had a negative comment. If friends or family are curious it will help you to talk about your condition. I have had 2 male friends and a sister want to see. She said "Oh my goodness". Then gave me a big hug. The 2 guys said dammit man! I wear snug tee shirts around the house. If some one comes to visit I don't change. When my wife and I go "out" wifey picks my shirt. I am 42 D and only an overcoat will totally hide my breasts. My wife says she dresses me so they don't jump out at you!
I hope I may have helped you a little

Thanks to you and everyone for sharing your experiences and words of support and advice.

The fact is I have lived a reclusive life due to my breasts, working from home instead of a day job etc, and am very shy as a result and self-conscious. I was fine going to the shops and other places in baggy tops but that is about all.

Now my breasts need support as I get older I know I need a bra. I cannot summon up the courage to get a fitting yet so I have ordered a 38D bra online - it is a fairly standard size and I have a female type build so am sure it will fit more or less. It is a soft cup, underwired bra. I will start wearing it to get used to the look and feel and then take it from there. 

aboywithgirls

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My wife and i are virtually the same size. Most of our bras are a 36G. Being the same size we have mutual expectations of how we dress. She doesn't make me wear a bra or make me go braless. Yes, it's "normal " for her to wear a bra and "normal " for me not to. She wants to look and feel her best and so do I. So she's going to pick out a bra to help with that and so will I. Our bras pretty much fit each other the same. However, there are certain bras that really put my girls front and center and she advises me about that. I know that I have large feminine breasts and I've elected to keep them but they are not something that I necessarily want to flaunt around when we go out.

Offline expedient-traveller

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Every gentleman who grows breasts will have acceptance issues because it is not expected of a man to have breasts. We get used to having the "assets" and come to accept them over time but the biggest fight we have with acceptance is in our own head. I used to think that everyone was looking at my boobs, 46 C/D, and it gave me fits...in my own head. I can count on one hand the number of looks I have gotten from guys checking out my boobs and I would still have fingers left to count on. The biggest looks I get are from women.
Without a "retaining device" (bra) to control your "assets", you are going to have problems with pulled muscles in your upper chest, upper back, and middle back. My brothers have stated it so very clearly that a "retaining device" is just exactly that. It keeps things from bouncing and jiggling all over and is far more comfortable in the long run. Even at my job, which is a very testosterone prone job (heating, cooling and refrigeration) and I also am a boiler engineer, but I have no problem with anyone and no one is trying to "check-out" my boobs. To bring everything back to square, the acceptance is in our heads since no one else really cares. Check out some of the advice given about certain "retainers" which are hardly noticeable under a shirt. You will do well and relax, it is not that bad. Zei gezunt! (Be well)

Offline jdavis

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Thank you to everyone who replied.

An update - my 38D bra arrived on Friday and I have been getting used to wearing it. It felt strange at first to be strapped in but it fits perfectly - my chest has a feminine structure - and now I hardly notice I am wearing it except that my breasts no longer bounce and jiggle. It is much more noticeable when wearing a tee shirt though as they now project straight out.

I will keep wearing it around the house and work towards plucking up the courage to wearing it out and about.

I will be here with updates and supporting the community.
Thanks again.




aboywithgirls

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I think that you will soon discover the benifits of wearing a bra. Yes, you're immediately going to find that your breasts have gone from bouncing to just a jiggle when you walk. However, you will probably find that the constant tugging feeling on your upper chest will go away. Also, if you wear regularly, especially during the warmer months, you can say goodbye to boob rash and seriously reduce boob sweat. 

Offline jdavis

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I think that you will soon discover the benifits of wearing a bra. Yes, you're immediately going to find that your breasts have gone from bouncing to just a jiggle when you walk. However, you will probably find that the constant tugging feeling on your upper chest will go away. Also, if you wear regularly, especially during the warmer months, you can say goodbye to boob rash and seriously reduce boob sweat.

I have already discovered the benefits you mention, particularly the rash as they were beginning to sag.

The next step is to pluck up the courage to wear it when out and about under normal clothes. One step at a time.

Offline littleguy

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The first time I wore a bra out I thought everyone was looking at me. They were not! It is just a regular thing now wearing one. Nobody cares. You will see just be confident.

aboywithgirls

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Wearing a bra is just something that people with large breasts do. I wake up and put on my bra and go about my day. I'm not trying to be a woman. I'm trying to be comfortable. 

Offline expedient-traveller

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Adding a few cents to the discussion: When at my boiler engineering job, which not only deals with guys but with the women who work in the building, I am expected to wear a bra to keep the assets from bouncing around when I walk and simply have them under control. Besides, when I am working on hot steam pipes in the boiler room, I do not want my boobs flopping about and getting burned by hot pipes (it has happened). Therefore, wearing a bra is comfortable and helps with safety as well. You see, it is a multipurpose safety tool as well as a retaining device. Be well.

Offline curiousk

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I’ve been wearing a bra for 2 months and it’s been one of the best decision I’ve made to deal with having breasts.   I’m very comfortable and supported wearing a bra.   I have 3 cotton wireless bras and as well as 2 unlined lace underwire bras.   The underwire bras provide nice support and projects a bit. I feel I look better wearing a bra.   If you have breasts, why not make them look good in a bra?


 

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