Hi Jay,
This has been a period of discovery for me. I found out just how much I wasn't watching. I'm always thinking about one thing or another. I'm a good model for "the absent minded professor" when I go shopping. Any of the guys here could have walked or wheeled right in front of me and I likely wouldn't have noticed. I really started tuning out when crotches hit the knees and his ass is sticking half out, or his boxers. I watch faces, not fashion.
A mention to Bob, my daughter was in art school and what she did with her hair was scary. She was a natural platinum blonde that went to a darker platinum as she aged. Electric blue is a little extreme. Also, the weirdest fashion statement I saw in the 80s were teenaged girls doing spring skiing wearing boys boxers over waffle-weave long underwear. I just about dropped my teeth on that, and they were all OEM then.
So reading here, especially the tales of anguish from some of our younger members, I started noticing. And then the collision of timing, needing new clothing. Not only have I worn out the clothing bough 9 years ago, I have worn out my "old man" clothes bought 20+ years before that. So now I have to buy and wear contemporary styles and colors so I started watching.
That was when I noticed that fat liberation had happened. I had suffered terrible fat shamming much of my life and my mother was anorexic and didn't let up if there was still meat on the bones. Guys who would have been hiding under 4 layers of XXXXL shirts and so on. Now the only guys wearing that kind of style that I have seen are guys with a serious reaction to their own gyne. Fat guys, which I also suffered from "fat guy syndrome not my fault" and hated the people doing calorie counts on my shopping cart and looking at my stomach. In recovering from many of my metabolic problems, suddenly my breasts were the only things sticking out. That was when I bought the first non-underwear t-shirts I had ever bought, 9 years ago.
So now comes reality. This year sizes have all changed. I had noticed that happening to shoes as the sizes became internationalized. I have old size 12 I can still wear but have to buy 14 now. XL shirts are not what they were. I've wear a 52 inch suit jacket now but have a 38 waist. When my waist was 34, my jacket size was 46. An XL shirt now for me is very form fitting. That was a shock. It was like something my wife bought for me 30-40 years ago and I could not wear it and couldn't even explain coherently So I watched. There is a group that is hyper sensitive, hyper aware of their own gyne and hyper reactive with fear. I've been there.
When I wore the t-shirts the last 9 years I just ignored my awareness of others. In some spiritual work circles it is said "It's none of your business what others think about you." It probably hurts the most to find out they don't care about you at all. First timers at a nudist club making their big entrance to the pool on a sunny day expect to be the center of attention, "Oh look, a new guy". Many seem disappointed when the only person who notices them at all says "No glass into the pool area please".
There are guys in advertising on TV that have plenty of gyne wearing t-shirts. There are guys with gyne with bare chests on some shows. I think society, especially advertisers, are trying to "normalize" anything they can that creates a market. I remember the fuss about putting deodorant ads on TV. The erection drug ads and vaginal cream ads during national news are totally inconceivable from a 1950-2000 period. I believe ads for bras designed for men will be on TV before too long. You know, a man and his girlfriend having one of those serious conversations and she says "I have a bra fitter you just have to meet. She will do wonders for your comfort" as she caresses his chest.
I agree with TomJones. Most of us notice it far more than most of the public. I see a smile of relief on other men who are sizable but smaller than me. The shirts I've just bought leave not even a fig leaf of hiding, no folds and bulges of cloth disguising what is there. They are very comfortable and feel entirely different from my other shirts which "hung" without touching my stomach, drawing my attention at least until they feel "normal".
And Paa Paw, the local HD isn't devoid of good looking ladies, they just were nowhere in the vicinity. There is one I joke with regularly that "we just have to stop meeting this way" and she flirts a little.
I had outright experiences of hateful discrimination in the 60's while wearing a beard and badly treated for fat at all sorts of ages. I've never had that happen for breasts once out of school.