Stages

[Johndoe1]

Another theme that comes out to me in the responses of gotgyne, AlfaQ, Johndoe1, and blad, is that while we accepted the need to wear a bra, we  felt constrained by our social surroundings. We would’ve been happy in bras if everybody else accepted us in bras.

I agree with this. I have said for a long time now if my bosom could have the same respect as women's bosoms, I would gladly submit to the draconian rules that society has placed on how women can show their breasts in public. While many of the rules are pretty stupid and were originally put forth in the Victorian Era, I argue that they're a far cry better than the shame and hiding many of us have had to endure. I am not trying to be a woman or present as a woman. I am just trying to be comfortable in my everyday life and if bras and such work for my body, then who the hell should care? I am not hurting anyone. 

I eventually got too big to even pretend I could hide. I personally believe that point is a C Cup, which I am now well past.

I got too tired of trying to hide what can't be hidden anymore. So I stopped trying. If my bosom shows, my bosom shows. It's not like I am wearing skin tight tops to show off my chest.

Sometimes I wonder what would’ve happened if the sales associates were not accommodating. I suspect it would’ve slowed me down, but not have stopped me.  I was long past denial. And camouflaging clearly no longer an option.

I have found, as many others here, most women will understand and have sympathy and empathy for us understanding the challenges of having breasts. Are there some women who fall in the "be-atch" category? Oh yes. I have dealt with some. There's a local shop that will not allow men into their shop much less serve men. So yes, they're out there. But it seems less than understanding ones. Don't be creepy and they will be accepting.

I need to wear a bra just like a woman does. And I will be wearing bras for the rest of my life.

And I like it that way.

I believe many of us feel the same way. Which is why we are here.

[WPW717]

Had the junior high school teasing like everyone who developed breasts. It had a negative effect that took a bit of time to overcome. Late adolescence placed me in the military environment (USN) and life went on with the boob issues fading into the background.
   Adulthood advanced me into the healthcare arena in a very hands on role. Saw a lot , did a lot, learned a lot.
Accepted a lot too. Onward and upward into senior citizen status and retirement. Off the rails here. T levels dropped as expected at that age but it wasn’t the slow slide of 1% /yr. It was a crash and burn scenario the Docs had no ear to hear with. The speed at which the bosom developed was stunning, 6 months!! The bust was 5” larger than the underbust. MEN Type 4 became the diagnosis after 4 years of exploration. The bosom fleshed out even more with the Prolactinoma.
The stages that Busty described are valid for me also, I just sped through them at Mach speeds. The insights gained here were valuable as were the nuggets of knowledge about bras.
     I want to thank all of you here for opening your ’robe’ and exposing yourselves and inner most thoughts and feelings. It is probably helpful to many of the silent ones that are here with questions. I know it has brought me immense comfort to help deal with what was a turbulent time. Life is settling down a bit and my headspace is very good. I have enjoyed the support, intellectual, emotional, and physical. Especially after learning that underwires are the way to go for the wide set among us.😃👍

[Busty]

Puna and Johndoe1,

I had a similar experience and reaction. People just seemed compelled to comment and not very nicely.  As I said, the most common being being told I need to wear a bra.  I don’t know why people felt that was the right thing to do.  As you said, Johndoe1, Not like we were bothering anybody. 

On the other hand, if I wasn’t always being told I needed to wear a bra, I wonder if I would’ve become so interested in and knowledgeable about bras. I doubt the girls in my class were studying each other’s bras or looking at everything they could find about bras. I mean, look at most women today. Most hate bra shopping and many are wearing the wrong size bra. 

[Busty]

WPW717,

Reading between the lines of what you shared, my takeaway is you have led a lifetime centered on caring and giving. My hunch is that challenges you faced along the way contributed to the qualities that enabled, and maybe even caused, you to do that. 

And if I am reading your measurements correctly, you are now a DDD!

[blad]

Another theme that comes out to me in the responses of gotgyne, AlfaQ, Johndoe1, and blad, is that while we accepted the need to wear a bra, we  felt constrained by our social surroundings. We would’ve been happy in bras if everybody else accepted us in bras.

This is exactly the way I had come to feel as a teen. I found acceptance and even enjoyment of my breasts once I discover how a bra fit and felt on me. I accepted in my mind that I did have breasts like the girls in my class and I want to treat them the same way they were able too by containing them in a bra. I liked how the bra supported them and removed that jiggle sensation that was a constant background irritation. I liked the complex emotional support wearing a bra gave me. Maybe somehow I felt I was part of a club; the I have breasts and thus wear a bra club. With all the "teasing" I had to endure it seemed good to belong to something  I could identify with. I could identify with how it felt to have breasts and wear a bra.

I had no illusions of wanting to be a girl. I liked looking at girls. But I also had breasts and wanted to be able to manage and enjoy them like the girls could. I definitely would have been quite accepting of wearing a bra full time even in those early teen years if I could have done so in a world of acceptance. The barrier to wearing a bra full time in those early years was not my attitude or acceptance, it was the acceptance of others. 

I sometimes fantasize what it would have been like if there was a dress code mandate to wear a bra to school or if my mom had suggested I wear a bra. Obviously it would have been mega embarrassing to start wearing a bra to school, but I was already being mega teased for needing a bra. After a while would it have been any worse? 

As an adult I eventually was able to decide what was best for me rather than over obsess how I fit in. I have always know since those early teen years that I was beast served by wearing a bra and over time I did just that and have been very satisfied to wear a bra full time. It is not about any thrill of wearing a bra as most of the time I forget I have one on. It is that if I am braless I am acutely aware of the negative sensations of not being supported in a bra.

To this day I think it would be a complicated world to develop breasts as a teen male. It is complicated even if you accept the need for a bra. But back in my time there were no resources and I felt like I was the only guy with boobs. 

[WPW717]

Busty
Very intuitive of you, spot on.
The east & west factor plus a very wide base puts me in the C /D category. The bra has to be generous in sizing. Have used Torrid and Wacoal.

[Busty]

blad,

I agree, 100% with what you said:

The barrier to wearing a bra full time in those early years was not my attitude or acceptance, it was the acceptance of others.I sometimes fantasize what it would have been like if there was a dress code mandate to wear a bra to school or if my mom had suggested I wear a bra. Obviously it would have been mega embarrassing to start wearing a bra to school, but I was already being mega teased for needing a bra. After a while would it have been any worse?

Looking back, if I had it to do all over again, After trying on my mother‘s bra and finding out how it fit and how I felt , I would’ve started wearing a bra to school.

As you said, we were already being teased that we needed to wear a bra. So what if we ended up being teased because we now wore a bra?

I never said anything all of the times I was told I needed to wear a bra. But if I had begun wearing a bra and then was teased for wearing a bra, I am pretty sure I would’ve said something.  After always being told I needed to wear a bra, I finally listened, and tried on a bra. And it fit great and it felt great to wear a bra. So, you were right, that I do need to wear a bra. Thank you. And from now on, I’m always gonna wear a bra.  If I was then told only girls wear bras, I would have said I have breasts like a girl, so I need to wear a bra just like a girl does. Don’t you think I look better in a bra than going braless like I was for so long?

I could have worn a regular bra to class and for PE, just kept a sports bra in my gym bag along with everything else I needed to wear for PE. And when I was assigned to the skins team, which I always was every class, Instead of running around topless, I would’ve worn my sports bra. It would’ve been a little awkward at first, but It would’ve been better than running around bare breasted.

And would’ve given me a level of protection against getting felt up in a way they never would dare with a girl.

Plus, it just would’ve felt better with my breasts contained and supported, and I would’ve looked better, without that movement on my chest or nipples poking through my tops, and just the more polished look of being lifted and shaped.

And, given the way some women have treated me now as I go about wearing a bra, I believe some of the girls might have been nicer to me

As you said, blad, Wouldn’t it have been wonderful if the school had sent me home with a note to my mother saying she’d been letting me come to school braless, and  That was too suggestive, And against school code, so from now on, please make sure I wore my bra to school?  Of course, that would’ve been way too much to ask, even though it would’ve made perfect sense.

I

[gotgyne]

Reading of your experiences with developing breasts during puberty, I am glad that it didn't happen to me. If this had happened to me, my father who wanted a manly and athletic boy would have never liked a son with breasts. The same with my mother. If she had noticed that I had tried on one of her bras she would have called a doctor.

Even worse are the experiences of Birdie as an intersex person. Trying to get things corrected with testosterone might have caused more damage instead of helping.

I am glad that all of you are at peace and even embrace your breasts now.