Author Topic: Conversations with parents [list]  (Read 16211 times)

Offline xXSocialPlagueXx

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I started this thread to maintain stories to help come out to family members/significant others. Please post how you came out to someone. Maybe your experience can help someone else.

I will start since I am the thread creator:
Quote
I started out telling my mother that I needed to talk to her about something very significant and I needed some time to talk later on when I felt comfortable. After a while we were both sitting on her bed and I went into it very slowly and she started guessing what I was going to say. Eventually I told her I had "Gynecomastia" to make it not sound so stupid. She did not know what that meant, so she continued to guess. After a moment or so I noticed a facial expression I said "Have you guessed it?". She then told me that she noticed my chest before. After that everything went smooth, and I told her that it's hard just laying on my back without embarrassment... everything went well.

-xXSocialPlagueXx

Offline Grandpa Bambu

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  • 31 Year Gynecomastia Victim...
When I found out that my condition had a name and that there was a 'fix' for it.... I told my wife that I'm getting surgery. That's the first time that she knew it bothered me...

GB
Surgery: February 16, 2005. - Toronto, Ontario Canada.
Surgeon: Dr. John Craig Fielding   M.D.   F.R.C.S. (C) (416.766.8890)
Pre-Op/Post-Op Pics

Offline booty_frijoles

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This is a great topic and I wish there were more replies!....this week is the first time I'm hoping to bring up enough courage to talk to my parents about this. To my mom first since I'm closer with her, but it kinda sucks cuz its easier to talk to a guy obviously. At least I think it would be.

Well it seems like this post is kinda dead, but just thought I'd let everybody know I'm doing it this week!.....hopefully

Wish me luck

Offline jorgexd

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it's been 6 years i'm having gyne , I'm 17 now,but like booty i'm planning on telling my parents. I've told them once like 2 years ago but i was 15 and my mom told me i was not ready for the surgery. Now i don't know why the darn i just can't tell them again, it feels so embarassing, i'm gonna get all the courage i can and tell them as soon as  possible.

Offline Merangue

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it's been 6 years i'm having gyne , I'm 17 now,but like booty i'm planning on telling my parents. I've told them once like 2 years ago but i was 15 and my mom told me i was not ready for the surgery. Now i don't know why the darn i just can't tell them again, it feels so embarassing, i'm gonna get all the courage i can and tell them as soon as  possible.

I know how you feel. I talked to my parents about it when I was 15ish (22 now). It was awkward as hell and I can still feel how jarring that moment was trying to make words of it (make sure you rehearse what you want them to know). I was really struggling with how deep I wanted to go with them. In the end, it was very brief (felt like it lasted an eternity), I just told them that the problem had been bothering me for a while.

It was in the hospital, I was there at the time for trivial bronchitis. It was just the three of us in the room, I didn't get a lot of opportunities like this so I figured it was a good a time as any.

My mom didn't say anything but my dad said he'd talk to a doctor about it. And that was it, dead silence after that.

He later told me that he talked to a doctor and he'd said it'd go away with time and exercise.

That's about the extent of the interaction with my parents on the topic. Back then I didn't even know about "gynocomestia" or that there was a treatment. They, of course, still don't know to this day.

Offline gofast_er

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When I was about 15 I tried one time to talk to my mom about it. It went something like this "(me) mom, if I tell you something do you swear to keep it between us? (her) of course. (me) .................................oh......um.....nothing....never mind."
It drove her crazy for so long. She kept trying to guess. Do I have an std? am I gay? what could it be? she had no clue. It bugged her for such a long time. She finally forgot about it though. I had surgery less than a week ago and have still not talked to her about it. I am now almost 29. I still want to tell her. I don't know how. Also, I'm not sure the surgery is really going to do much. I know it has only been 5 days but it isn't looking good. As of now I see absolutly ZERO change and am starting to get really scared I may have thrown away 3500 dollars and still have this problem. I really need to talk to her about it. I just don't know how.

Offline gofast_er

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My chest first started bothering me when I was 13. That was back in 1993 and I'm now almost 29. I JUST told my mom about an hour ago! I did it by sending her the link to a message I posted here. She called back after reading the post and all the responses. It was hard as hell to talk to her at first. I was silent a lot. She told me she wished she could go back in time so she could take care of it back when I was a teenager. I feel like kicking myself in the ass soooo damn hard now. After living with this for so so long and she would have been willing to help me back when I was a teenager.
Anyway, that's how I finally told her. I can 't belive that after almost 16 years I JUST told her. It's a weird thought. I didn't think I would ever tell her or anyone else.
I don't how or if she is going to help me now. I just had lipo done a week ago. I know it's only been a week but I could already tell it's an utter failure. She wants me to wait at least a few months before I decide to do anything else. I guess after that I'll go from there. I do feel like some weight has been taken off my shoulders though. After keeping it in for so long....wow.

Offline Dave_8

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I showed my father the Gynecomastia Documentary on youtube. It worked for my dad, but for my mom, I wouldn't try.
If you have gyne, dont expect not be laughed at.

Just like if you walk into a locker room, you're gonna see some hairy asses and dicks.

Unfortunately for me, both have occured in my life way too many times.

Offline BadCaseGyno

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I really don't know what the beef is about telling your parents. FFS they're YOUR PARENTS. Sure, its a little embarrassing, but these are the people who have fed you, clothed you, bathed you when you were little (which included washing your little pecker). Just because I want to be viewed as a masculine badass by the people around me doesn't mean I have to put on that charade for my parents. People really need to get over telling them, because they're the people who can help the most.

Offline Dave_8

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Yeah but they can also be the ones that bring you down the hardest.

Offline BadCaseGyno

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Yeah but they can also be the ones that bring you down the hardest.

How so? Unless your parents are inhuman aliens from the planet zork they aren't going to make fun of you, and when shown the facts (and this website) any human being would understand the pain and suffering the condition causes. The worst a parent could say is "we don't have the money for surgery" and go from there.

Offline Dave_8

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Haha not in my case, my mother told me if I had surgery, that would show her that I'm old enough to live without her and she would leave me. And I'm pretty sure she's Human from planet Earth.

Offline datamonger

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I told my mom when I was finally diagnosed with gyne.  She told me that it was alright and asked me if they bothered me.  I told her not really, but I think I need a bra.  It turned out that I am a 40B and now I wear a bra regularly.

Offline Jopet

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guys, guys.. parents are parents....
If there's a person who should know first about your problems, that would be your parents. Because I think they're the only one who really cares about us, siblings, when the going gets rough and tough and if everyone had turned their backs on you, they're the one who always facing you with a smile and comforts you...right?
*** THE GREATEST AMOUNT OF WASTED TIME IS THE TIME NOT GETTING STARTED. ***

Offline lighting506

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It's hard to do it, but for anyone under the age of 20, it's nessassary.

I had my doctor tell us both at a phisical. Later I told her how much it bugged me my whole life.

She still doubted me and said "I don't see what's wrong, you look normal, nobody notices" but I always said "I notice" and it was over.

- Tom


 

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