just got a new girlfriend...

[EvDog]

Hi, im a 19 year old with what i consider a very clear case of gynecomastia.  im about 6'5" and i used to weigh nearly 300 pounds, but over the last couple years i lost 70 pounds and am trying to lose more and i am already in decent shape.  before i lost weight i went to a pediatrician with my moobs and he said that it was all fat, but after loosing so much weight and getting second opinions from my family, it was determined that losing weight wont cure my problem.  I recently decided that im sick and tired of not going swimming and not taking my shirt off and wearing so many ungodly layers in times of heat just to hide my breasts.  being in college i am getting a decent amount of looks from women, but only when i am wearing layers because my moobs look like nice pecs under certain clothes.  of these women, i found one that seems to like me a lot, and i like her very much as well
  being somewhat ashamed of having plastic surgery, i refuse to tell my friends the truth, im just gonna tell them that doctors needed to remove dangerous lumps in my breasts, but i think that in order to build trust with my new girlfriend, do i tell her that im getting the surgery or just one day show up without manboobs and lie to her?  what do i do.....?

ps: sorry for the poor sporadic wording of this message but i have so many thoughts i need to get out and am too lazy to organize it al

[Dave_8]

Tell your friends you're having ribs surgery cause the lumps in you chest seems a little suspicious. Just tell your girlfriend, if she laughs and it hurts you, obviously she's not the one. Good luck with everything though.

[Aperture]

In my opinion, the hardest thing to hide will be your recovery.  It'll be a lot easier to tell her, rather than hiding it from her.  Remember, you'll probably be wearing a vest for 6 weeks, 3 of those weeks you'll have to wear it 24/7 (in most cases).

[EvDog]

yeah thats what im thinkin too.  she must like me for who i am moobs and all so if i tell her im getting surgery i think she will accept that too... but you are right, if she laughs or makes me feel bad about it, she is not the one for me.  she changes what she looks like by doing some tanning and sometimes dying her hair and i still like her so i think that she should still like me if i change what i look like too   i just scheduled a consultation on March 2 with Dr. Kevin Muiderman and ill let you all know how it goes.

[Aperture]

Good luck man, all the best.  I have never been able to bring it up to anyone, let alone my past girlfriends. I wish i told them. I really do think it ruined one of them, because i just couldn't be myself when we were intimate and she would always ask if something was up (i was very shy when we were intimate due to my chest) and i would have to make lame excuses, which led her to believe it was her fault

[EvDog]

hey man i feel you... i prolly will be very hesitant too so i hope that i can get something done before she starts to think its her fault im so shy

[EvDog]

damn... she just told me she has a hot tub... i hope i get the surgery done before she invites me in there... lol  commence operation avoid hottub!

[Twin Peaks]

I told my girlfriend before I got the surgery and it was the best thing I could have done.  It was a huge weight lifted off my shoulders.  She came with me to the surgery and helped my recover in the hotel over the weekend.  We were together for over 2 years at that point though, so it wasn't extremely difficult to tell her.  If she was a new girlfriend, I might have a harder time though.

[confused_satisfaction]

hey man i was almost in the same boat as you.. haha.. 19 years old.. lost a bunch of weight.. 6'5.. it was like reading my own life story really hah.. currently going to college.. all that good stuff. anyway. i was dating a girl not too long ago, but it wasnt for long. it was on and off for a couple months. for some reason she always liked to pinch my moobs.. but when we had sex, i also never took off my shirt and it never came up? anyway, if we were still dating i would have told her a couple days before the surgery so she knows whats up. if she cares enough then she will understand where you are coming from, if not, then move on man. thankfully my ex is a psycho-bitch and i dont have to put up with her anymore  so i think your best bet is to tell her.

ps. now that i am out of a relationship (and i have surgery next thursday) i am not looking for another relationship till i am done with this (hopefully all goes well..). BUT when i do get back into that scene, i am going to be more willing to talk about the condition with people post-op rather then pre-op.

with your possible surgery so far away though, you might want to hold off telling her till you know shes something special

[EvDog]

well... last week i told her... it was very hard to do but the night before i night before i got drunk and told her on the phone that i needed to tell her something and that my other friend already knows (i told him earlier that day cuz of my drunken condition) and bcuz women like to know important things like this before anyone else, i had to tell her.  but she said that she supported my decision and that she will visit me when i am laid up for a bit   she was mainly interested in the whole thing saying, "i never knew anyone who had plastic surgery before let alone dated one!"  and then later that night we made out for about half an hour so i dont think it bothers her that much...  so yay!  i picked a winner!

[Aperture]

That's awesome. She's a keeper!

[Paa_Paw]

I'll wager that she has some things that she considers imperfections which you pay little attention to, or possibly do not even see. Love is like that.

[Postop Boy]

Good Man! I've just had the surgery. My girlfriend came with me and has been very supportive since. If people can't accept why you have to do it then that's there problem but it sounds like she's a good 'un. Good luck with the future matey boy.

[caps]

Everyone in this thread has given pretty good advice.

I say...always tell your wife or g/f before hand.  She'll almost always support you.  And tshe may get mad at you if you don't tell her first.  Also, consider this:  She may NOT want you to have the surgery, in which case you save a lot of pain, scares, moo-la, ...and she gets to keep her man the way she likes him.

jn

[Dave_8]

Congrats, so lucky.