As well as Gynecomastia I have a another, similar, unwanted aspect to my body which I have carried all my life and that is that I am very hard of hearing. You wouldn't believe how cruel and vulgar so-called sophisticated adults can be when they encounter this. All my life I have been on the receiving end of seriously nasty comments and unpleasant, hurtful jokes, -to my face and in the company of others-, very often from people who would appear to outsiders to be pillars of society, holding down important responsible jobs. With the constant exposure to this over the years I found I couldn't help but become indifferent because it taught me that people who behave that way are themselves vulgar and unsophisticated, whatever level they might be at in society. Therefore their opinions are worthless. Also, it taught me that such comments and opinions can't actually hurt you. Yes, it might sting at the time and it sure makes you wonder why, mentally and emotionally, most people are still in the school playground, but they are just words. They won't actually do you any real harm. When I try and work out just exactly why people want to be so hurtful it sure seems to me that the engine that drives their nastiness is the fact that you have been strong enough to successfully come to terms with something which they know they would have enormous difficulty accepting if they found it in theirselves. In other words, you cause them to realise they are weaker and smaller and less resilient than you, and they hate you for it. One other unexpected thing I found through the years is that all the nasty comments follow the same format! You find people saying the same thing over and over again, mistakenly imagining they are coming out with something original. I have had works colleagues furiously twirling their hands in my face in a parody of sign language in exactly the same way as the children around me used to do when I was in junior school! Astonishing to find a so-called adult exhibiting exactly the same behaviour as junior school children. So after a while you find you have heard it all before and it all gets rather boring. All of what I have said here goes for wearing a bra too. What I would say is try and be strong and do what feels right for you, whether that's using a bra or using hearing aids. Yes, there will be awkward moments, but just accept that and ignore those around you who are not supportive. You will emerge a better, stronger person for it.
Piglet.
Topic: How to stay confident (Read 5925 times)
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