Well what a waste of time telling my dad was...

[_Edward_]

How depressing... I got up the courage to tell my dad, which has taken me years, and his response was "you worry about your appearance too much" and "I've never noticed it, don't be so stupid" and "Well we'll go see this doctor (dr. star), and see what she says, but if she doesnt say that you should have surgery then there's no way I'm paying for you to go see a plastic surgeon"

What a result eh? I hardly wish I bothered  

[Allan7865]

Man that sucks  

Could you post some pics so we can be on your side.

[BR_Guy]

I'll suggest you to do something difficult and boring at a first thought.

I don't know where you are, but no matter where you will find some psychiatric public service (or you can pay for one if you want). Get an appointment, tell about your problem and about your dad reaction.
The psy will call your father and will explain how important it is for you.

An alternative to that is talking to your mom, grandfather, uncle or any other person that can go to your dad and show how serious is the problem.

I know... this makes everything more hard and embarrassing, but the important thing is not give up.
Once you had started this by talking to your dad, go ahead and do anything to let him know how this is important to you.
Once he realize that, he'll step back and will fully support you.

God luck.

[brm]

Edward, keep on your line. But there's something positive in your father's response. He may have been perfectly sincere when saying he had not noticed. If so, he must  not be the only one and this point must be a help for you to regain some self confidence until you may get your surgery. Anyway, what about trying the other side, I mean your mother and getting her to convince your father. This is the first step I would take.

[mrfantastic5]

did any of you come to think that mabye edward's case is very slight/not even that bad and maybe his dad's boobs are a lot bigger

so the father's responose is quite legitimate.. lol

sorry bro, if it's a huge deal that sucks.

but again, maybe it is in your head

i think ur dad was on the right track there.  SEe a doc and see what he says.

[kev]

Go to a doctor and tell them how its messing up your life and ask them to pass that onto your father.

My father was the same.

[ruinedlifenew]

did any of you come to think that mabye edward's case is very slight/not even that bad and maybe his dad's boobs are a lot bigger

so the father's responose is quite legitimate.. lol

You mean in the way your gyno was virtually non existant and how your chest looked better before surgery?

http://www.gynecomastia.org/cgi-bin/gyne_yabb/YaBB.cgi?board=11;action=display;num=1135703813;start=0#0

I don't see what's so funny about his dad not understanding his dilemma.

Edward, don't give up.  Take the advice and see a doctor.  Your dad just learned about this; there's plenty you can do to get him to come around.  Leave nothing out when you tell your doctors/dad about how much this affected your life.

Telling your dad wasn't a waste of time.. it was a beginning.

[mrfantastic5]

uhm, no if he is bitching to his father about getting gyno surgery and he has a very slight case he has problems with his appearance and his father is 100% dead right.

yes i got surgery

but i was 20 years old and did it for cosmetic reasons, not for psyhological health.

this kid obviously needs support finanically for this sort of things, and it is again a case like mine which is simply cosmetic he can wait till he gets enough money himself to perform the procedure.

ofcource it doesn't matter how the case looks like if it bothers you.  The difference is that if the case if miniscule and it bothers you like u have a D Cup you have body dysmorphic disorder...

now even if his case is miniscule and it does bother him sooo much that he feels he needs surgery ASAP or he can't go on.. HE needs mental help.

fact of the matter is.. if he has a case that an insurance company wont pay for because it's tiny, do you really think his father will?  No.  My guess is if the father doesn't think there's a problem, the doc wont think there's a problem either.  THe only problem will be in the kids head.  

if it is a legitimate concern.. his father is an awesome dad... He was honest with the kid, said he didn't see a problem, but sitll offered to see a doc.

i'm being biased here.  The kid is upset at his father because he didn't jump the gun and say. YES! surgery is for you.  AM i wrong?? comon.  The grown ups here... IF your son came to you with this problem, and u didn't see anything too wrong with his chest u would also offer to take your son to the docotor ??

i mean comon.. ya son, i know nothing about gyno, but from what u say i'll shell out 5 grand.

[mrfantastic5]

edward all i can say to you is your dad gave u the best possible response.

trust me on this..  A lot better if your family were millionairs and he offered to pay for plastic surgery because it was nothing to him just to make you happy.

go to the doctor.  See what he says.  Tell him exactly how u feel, and don't hold back.. have your father be present in the room.

and go from there

[Worrier]

At least your Dad cares about you enough to come with you to the doctors. Although my parents were sympathetic when my gyno was worse, my uncle when he heard told to 'lose some weight you fat cu**.'

In my opinion if your Dad said he didn't notice it maybe it is not that bad.I can see why you might be unsure of your dads opinion as parents tend to think there kids look great whatever, so hopefully the doctor you are seeing could either reassure you if your dad is right or explain to your dad about gynecomastia and what options there are to deal with your case .

Echoing what others have said tell the doctor how it makes you feel when your dad is in the room, even if it isn't a very significant case it can still mess with your head and your dad should know this.

Don't give your old dad too much stick   if he really didn't give a crap about 'your gyno' he wouldn't even bother arranging to see a doctor about this.

[kev]

It's tough for people who haven't had a problem to understand (e.g. mrfantastic)... talk to your dad and the doctor, try to get the doctor to talk to your father.

[jc71]

I haven't read the earlier posts so maybe someone already suggested this, but have dad commit to 10 minutes looking over this site.