Author Topic: Book worth buying?  (Read 10535 times)

Offline Grandpa Bambu

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I am leaving in a couple of weeks on vacation and when I get back I will be having my second surgery.

Good luck dude!

As lopher mentioned, please fill us in on the details/pics if you don't mind.  

Have a great vacation!  ;)

John.
« Last Edit: July 13, 2006, 07:39:14 AM by Bambu »
Surgery: February 16, 2005. - Toronto, Ontario Canada.
Surgeon: Dr. John Craig Fielding   M.D.   F.R.C.S. (C) (416.766.8890)
Pre-Op/Post-Op Pics

Offline merle

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Comments on books that you have not read, so a lack of education, class and self esteem.
Demystifying Gynecomastia: Men with Breasts
The first book on Gynecomastia

My newest book: Facing the Truth of Your Life is very relevant to members of this forum. It could save you a lot of unnecessary pain and time.

Book books are available on Amazon. FTTOYL is also available through your local bookstore or on Audible or iTunes.

Offline jc71

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C'mon Graham, cut the guy some slack.

Merle's probably done more to spread the word about gynecomastia than anyone else.


Offline lopher

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Comments on books that you have not read, so a lack of education, class and self esteem.


I don't think that's a very nice attitude to take. We've wished you all the best in your upcoming surgery and all you seem to care about is a lack of sales of your book.

If this site gets 1.5 million hits per year, i'd be surprised if the advertising dosen't cover the running costs of this forum  ::)

Personally if I was to write a book on Gynecomastia it would be more of an A - Z encyclopedia. Listing every piece of relevant factual information on the issue. In a clearly laid out format. The bottom line is we all have questions that pop into our minds, and if we could use it as a reference guide to skip straight to that relevant section, then great. I don't want to sit down and cycle through hundreds of pages to get (or not get) an answer to a very specific question, then i'm not going to be a happy chappy.

If you have faith in your book, then why not post the first one or 2 chapters etc for people here to read. If it's a great read then people will buy it. If it's dry and vague then people won't.

Personally I buy loads of books. But if im in the library or book store then i'll pretty much always read the first few pages or chapter to get an idea of the book, if I like it I buy it, if I dont, i wont!

Next time your in a book store take a look around... How many people just walk in, pluck a book off the shelf and walk straight to the counter?

Not many.

And seriously the life and soul of this forum are not the administrators but the contributors who spend their time answering the same newbie questions over and over without intolerance. I just don't see you taking the time to do this. I'm a busy guy too, but i'll still chip in wherever possible with a little advice. Comments like "This question can be answered in my book" Well hmm  ::)

lopher
« Last Edit: July 13, 2006, 10:30:26 PM by lopher »

Offline merle

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There is a thread of entitlement that to often goes through threads. I appreciate all the kind words and listen to the less than kind ones to see if there is any truth.

There seems to be some illusion on some people’s part that I am making a fortune on the site. Far from it. Given the history of the site, I doubt that I have even broke even at this point, and I keep spending money on the site and book. Most of the money goes back in, in some way.

The only thing that I have objected to is visitors telling me what is wrong with the book when they have not read it. They get no credibility and simply show they like to complain without having any idea about what they are talking about.

The forums do a lot of good, but there is a lot of crap and that is why I have not spent a lot of time here. I get questions daily to my private email address and I work hard to answer them all. The book was in part to ease that load, as I do attempt on rare occasions to have a life. I have been doing this a long time and I do my best to put the best information out there.

I find that I don't have a lot of patience for questions that I have answered in the book. And most of the questions come and ask for a definitive answer when there is none and most have not provided me with enough information to even give a good guess.

It is helpful for people to do a little research before asking questions so that they can ask better questions or at least understand what they are asking.

Enough venting.

My surgery is scheduled with Delgado for August 31. He is being generous and it is still costing me a lot of money. I really appreciate all the support. I have considered having second surgery for a long time, and in preparation for it, I started seeing a trainer three times a week and doing cardio 4-5 times a week.

I ended a 19-year relationship 3+ years ago and in part it is for me and to make me more marketable. I have had back problems for several years, which had stopped me from working out. That is why I hired a trainer to work with me to try and prevent further injury.

I am leaving in a couple of weeks on a two-week vacation. I am scheduled to go to Israel. Assuming that we can still travel there, I will be there the first couple of weeks of August.

I will post some pictures soon, I have three businesses and the one that makes no money is taking all the time and I am in the process of getting rid of it. Like gynecomastia.org it has been a labor of love and the love affair is over and I want my life back.

Merle

Offline Hypo-is-here

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There is a thread of entitlement that to often goes through threads. I appreciate all the kind words and listen to the less than kind ones to see if there is any truth.

There seems to be some illusion on some people’s part that I am making a fortune on the site. Far from it. Given the history of the site, I doubt that I have even broke even at this point, and I keep spending money on the site and book. Most of the money goes back in, in some way.

The only thing that I have objected to is visitors telling me what is wrong with the book when they have not read it. They get no credibility and simply show they like to complain without having any idea about what they are talking about.

The forums do a lot of good, but there is a lot of crap and that is why I have not spent a lot of time here. I get questions daily to my private email address and I work hard to answer them all. The book was in part to ease that load, as I do attempt on rare occasions to have a life. I have been doing this a long time and I do my best to put the best information out there.

I find that I don't have a lot of patience for questions that I have answered in the book. And most of the questions come and ask for a definitive answer when there is none and most have not provided me with enough information to even give a good guess.

It is helpful for people to do a little research before asking questions so that they can ask better questions or at least understand what they are asking.

Enough venting.

My surgery is scheduled with Delgado for August 31. He is being generous and it is still costing me a lot of money. I really appreciate all the support. I have considered having second surgery for a long time, and in preparation for it, I started seeing a trainer three times a week and doing cardio 4-5 times a week.

I ended a 19-year relationship 3+ years ago and in part it is for me and to make me more marketable. I have had back problems for several years, which had stopped me from working out. That is why I hired a trainer to work with me to try and prevent further injury.

I am leaving in a couple of weeks on a two-week vacation. I am scheduled to go to Israel. Assuming that we can still travel there, I will be there the first couple of weeks of August.

I will post some pictures soon, I have three businesses and the one that makes no money is taking all the time and I am in the process of getting rid of it. Like gynecomastia.org it has been a labor of love and the love affair is over and I want my life back.

Merle


An awful lot of truth in that post Merle.  I would have thought you might have been far more PC/diplomatic on here, far more removed and said a lot less than you have.  

It is nice to hear about your thoughts/reasoning in terms of where you are with the site/book and also with regards to your upcoming surgery.  It shows the human face behind the site.  

All the best- surgery included.  



Offline jc71

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You know I've been hearing a lot here about, 'spreading the word' lately that it's made me wonder. Is this what we really want? For more men and women out there to know that men having breasts is actually a 'condition' of some kind? Someone once told me that I didn't have to worry about my boobs because most people would just assume I was rather fat and move on. However, if we start unnecessarily informing everyone out there about gyno, I suspect people like us will get teased and stared at even more. Not only that, more and more young men, even with very mild gyno will start feeling insecure about themselves and perhaps spend lots of money on unnecessary surgery. I think what's happening now is just fine. If it bothers you enough, you'll go to the Net and find this site and learn all about gyno. No need for everyone on the street to know about this. Treatment options should also not be dependent on popularity. Just because a 'condition' is not very well known to the public, does not mean endochrinologists and surgeons shouldn't care about it either.



Graham:

"Spreading of the word" is long overdue. Educating guys with this condition, as well as parents, teachers and coaches can only help to build tolearance and a better understanding.

Sure, you'll get the occasional pin head who'll take this new found knowledge and run with it, creating lude verbal and physical assaults on anyone that appears to have anything other than a flat chest.

I think that person is the exception to the rule.  

Think about it. Who benefits most from "spreading the word?"  It's the guy who's contemplating suicide because he thought he was the only one who had moobs. It's the guy who hides in his bedroom with the social skills/personality of a door knob without the slightest shred of confidence.

Remember when you were teaching us about your Mind Control techniques?

You mentioned something about using the sub-conscious powers of your mind to create your physical reality? Something about using your mind as a magnet to attract into your life what you desire most?

Or the time you threatened to use the power of your mind to zap Hypo with a life threatening illness?

Kidding aside. My point is, the end result of "spreading the word" works much the same way. Those without this condition will soon lose interest in both this site and any further information on the topic.

Others, like me, can't seem to get enough.

The guys on the street that you speak of (the ones who will pick on us if they learned about our condition) are a lot like the trolls we occasionally see visit this site.  They're here today, gone tomorrow.

As with your opinion on surgery, what you suggest about those who learn about this condition feeling more insecure about themselves, is suggesting the exception rather than the rule.

I know you feel you're offering another option to an online gyne community that you feel is over-the-top Pro Surgery. I can respect that, but most guys who go into surgery understanding that their chest will be better but not perfect should have some peace with their results.

The vast majority of guys who learn that they have this condition feel a new found strength, not insecurity.  Giving it a name/face is a huge relief.





« Last Edit: July 14, 2006, 08:57:24 PM by jc71 »

Offline Grandpa Bambu

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jc....

Excellent post dude!

John.

Offline oldgynodude

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I don't understand the negativity of some individuals on this message board.

If they don't want to purchase a book, then fine, don't purchase it. There's no reason to badmouth or second guess another individual simply because they are writing and selling a book. Go to any website that deals with issues of health, beauty, appearnce, etc. etc., and they too will sell books.

This website helped me a LOT with my concerns and issues regarding this condition, and all for FREE. Most of the people here are very supportive and understanding.  But it appears as if some people come here just to show how much of a chip on their shoulder and be very antagonistic and hostile.

Face it, many of us are glad this issue is finally starting to get widespread attention. To believe that doing so would only cause more pain and embarrasment is false. Anyone that had or has this condition knows that the pain and embarrasment has always existed, even before we knew it even had a name. That's why we kept our shirts on at the beach, etc. etc., because of embarrassment. The mean spirited people that would make fun of us probably don't know the condition has a name either but they have always poked fun of it for many years now. So to say that bringing more attention would cause more pain and embarrasment is false IMHO. And juice is right, insurance companies in the u.s. don't care about the emotional pain this condition may cause and the surgery options available. Perhaps more attention will help this cause.

And finally, sugery is not for everyone, anyone that comes to this site can make their own personal decisions regarding that. They can weigh the risks on their own, and abide by their own decisions.

Offline jc71

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Dude, you've lost it.

Offline merle

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So what you are really talking about here is your own shame and self hatred. You keep trying to believe that everyone in the world  is as full of same and self loathing as you. They are not. And all of your projection of your stuff onto them is not helping in your healing.

Telling the truth and learning more is a way out of shame for most people. Clearly, knowing more about gynecomastia has not helped you.  You are angry. I would guess that it probably has very little to do with your chest. You are only seeing the world through one lens and it is hurting you.

Merle

Offline merle

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The problem is that you clearly do not have any objectivity. You are just angry and you keep twisting to get out of owning your own words. I have a lot of sadness for you.

Merle

Offline Ffurg

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Graham what your saying is ridiculous. Merle is totally spot on with his comments.

The bottom line is this. EVERYONE has a name for gyne at the moment. And the uneducated name is b!tch t!ts.

Is that what you prefer over gynecomastia?

Graham grow up.

Offline Hypo-is-here

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I don't understand the negativity of some individuals on this message board.

If they don't want to purchase a book, then fine, don't purchase it. There's no reason to badmouth or second guess another individual simply because they are writing and selling a book. Go to any website that deals with issues of health, beauty, appearnce, etc. etc., and they too will sell books.

This website helped me a LOT with my concerns and issues regarding this condition, and all for FREE. Most of the people here are very supportive and understanding.  But it appears as if some people come here just to show how much of a chip on their shoulder and be very antagonistic and hostile.

Face it, many of us are glad this issue is finally starting to get widespread attention. To believe that doing so would only cause more pain and embarrasment is false. Anyone that had or has this condition knows that the pain and embarrasment has always existed, even before we knew it even had a name. That's why we kept our shirts on at the beach, etc. etc., because of embarrassment. The mean spirited people that would make fun of us probably don't know the condition has a name either but they have always poked fun of it for many years now. So to say that bringing more attention would cause more pain and embarrasment is false IMHO. And juice is right, insurance companies in the u.s. don't care about the emotional pain this condition may cause and the surgery options available. Perhaps more attention will help this cause.

And finally, sugery is not for everyone, anyone that comes to this site can make their own personal decisions regarding that. They can weigh the risks on their own, and abide by their own decisions.



Brilliant post.

Graham,

The idea that education is harmful and that ignorance is a more blissful state is what is fundamentally flawed here that and how you project your problems onto other people.

It is also worth saying that Merle has done an awful lot to help boys and men with gynecomastia by devoting his time and efforts to creating this website and write the book, the book will reach people that the website cannot and vice versa . Now you wouldn’t have your voice on this website if it wasn’t for him, so I don’t think it is right to besmirch his character, if you don’t want to buy the book fine then don’t- where is the problem?
« Last Edit: July 15, 2006, 10:54:18 PM by Hypo-is-here »

Offline merle

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Graham,

My sadness has nothing to do with whether you have surgery or not. You keep trying to make this about gynecomastia, its not.  It is about you, your anger, your dispair, you isolation and loneliness.

My sadness is that you are in so much pain, and it appears that you have no interest in getting out of it. Being stuck is painful, hopefully you will get tired of being in so much pain and choose a healing path for you, no matter what that is.

Merle


 

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