Words don't change reality -
You're absolutely right. Those chromosomes tell a story... but then so do changes in our endocrine system. We develop breasts ONLY because the hormone mix in our bodies is changing, often through reductions in testosterone that can come with age. However, we know from men here that many of us developed soft chests, even breasts when we were teens. Doctors said it was a normal developmental stage as our bodies came to terms with changes in adolescence. But for some they never changed and their breasts got bigger. They may have been "assigned male at birth" but their bodies were saying... "wait a minute."
Since there is no such thing as a standard male we understand that those AMAB will in reality land somewhere on a continuum from more to less masculine, less to more feminine. Being on the feminine end of the continuum won't make us women... we'll still be men, simply feminized men. Of course, none of this is meaningful for those with ambiguous genetics... people like Birdie. So you may wish to talk about squares and circles but it is much more complicated than two simple shapes. Estrogen not only gives us breasts, it changes our minds as well. I believe I recall you saying something about it being easier to relate to your wife. That is likely attributed to reduced testosterone which allows estrogen to have its way with you... we could say feminizing you. You are a more feminine man now. I imagine for some men that would be hard to take... for most of us it is a blessing.