Author Topic: 20 year old in bra  (Read 1404 times)

Offline Craig N

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Dale asked me to post this here 
Do many men with Gynecomastia live with bras? 
I found this forum a few months ago but decided to put something on it now.  I’m  20 , at university  living in a house with  4 girls and 2 other lads. 
I was always chubby as a kid and had the typical figure with wide hips. I have a big fat pad which consumed my male thingy and that never really grew. I lost weight when I was 18 but my breasts are significant , not just fat but full with big nipples.The fat pad still there and wider hips- I’m not thin still. Last year I saw the doctor and she confirmed gynecomastia suspected following tests. I haven’t told my Dad although he made fun of my chest a bit saying keep dieting . 
Earlier in the year (admittedly when  a bit drunk ) I ended up confiding to three of the girls in the house. They said they had seen my chest through t shirts and seen me massaging them when they get sore. A few days later I let one of them see them and she measured my chest.  She talked about support but I shrugged it off. A week or so later one of the girls came in my room and produced a package with a few bras in and said I may like to try some, they may help. Their treat, they had bought them between them. Possibly I felt obliged but I agreed and she help me put one on. They had sized me at 42b and this seemed to fit. As I put my jumper back on , the two other girls came in and said it looked better, I said they felt supported.  Then it turned out the other girl in the house knew the situation and I figured that atleast one guy would know as he was the boyfriend of one of girls.  
I started wearing the bras around the house, the guys said nothing and the girls were supportive. It made it easier as I didn’t have to hide and could slum around in t shirts. And my chest felt better. I knew the lads looked at my boobs before my face. After a few months  I would wear them into class under thick jumpers.I’d bought a few sports bras online to try minimise them a bit on advise from the girls - but it didn’t seem much and the normal bras were comfier. It sort of got routine when I got dressed  to put a bra on. 
I tried to hide it but they do look different with it obviously. I look to have boobs with it without them !  But wearing a bra feel more comfortable, no jiggling or soreness. It took a few months for one of the girls in my class to comment on my breasts ( not bra) - negatively and then a few guys just laughed.
I have a part time job to subsidise uni working in an office. I think the boss there knows but she said nothing. One of the girls from the house works there and I presume she may have said something.  I forgot one day in summer and ran to the shop in a t shirt , this young builder made a comment and grabbed hold of my chest as we walked out together. I just got away quickly, felt humiliated. Didn’t wear a bra for a few weeks , pains came back and everyone in the house noticed. When the girls noticed I just said I felt silly in a bra with a mans body, the builder had said “ best breasts on a man and he has a bra”. 
On my birthday last year  the girls in the house  clubbed together with the lads and in a surreal moment when I opened it , had bought me a selection of Victoria’s Secret stuff. But not just bras, panties aswell. Its the way they said the next bit , well the girl who is lesbian said it- girls need sexy underwear to make them feel confident - you should try . Fair enough two were almost like plain shorts but one set was pure lingerie. The shorts style were fine. When I looked in the mirror it seemed to hang together more and I looked more natural. By the weekend the girls were wanting me try the blue lingerie. Anna, the lesbian said when underwear all matches if feel confident and sexier. So on the Saturday I did- felt a bit pressurised.  I looked in the mirror and odd but looked right together. And strangely comfy and confident. My chest looked bigger and seemed to show through my shirt more. So I was more conscious wearing this than the others. 
A few weeks later, Anna asked how I felt and talked me into going shopping with her. Anna went with me to Victoria’s Secret sales pretending to buy for her but it was for me. I think the assistant knew as we arn’t the same size ! Not wanting to create a scene I found myself buying a few sets, she said I’d feel good in them and on the way home we went in another shop, I presumed for her and realised she had put my size in the basket of two more basic bras and panties. She paid. She said it was great that I was living with my breasts and the house was all behind me, I looked so much better and relaxed with my chest supported, like one of the girls. 
This was all months ago, I’m approaching my 21st birthday, lost a bit more weight, still have b cup breasts, no change down below and fat pad hiding what little I have. And whilst I wear my male clothes, I’m wearing female underwear daily. It all seems so “normal” here. Chest more comfortable with bra than without, support from housemates. I rarely go home given work, Covid and studies. 
I suppose I’m wondering if this is a way of coping with gynecomastia ? Is it a way of going forward ? Everything is gender fluid nowadays. What do others think ? 

Offline Dale Warnio

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 I think you are welcome here, Craig. And you should find acceptance here. 

 We are men with breasts like women. Those who choose to keep their breasts, then must care for their breast the way women do.  Good breast health is important, along with comfort and appearance   

 Again, welcome 

Offline Dmajman

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I suppose we all have different ways of coping with what life has dealt us. There will be those who will never understand and others who will. I come to this site because it really helps me deal with my growing gynecomastia as I read about others experiences. You are not alone in this journey!

Offline 42CSurprise!

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What I appreciate is both how open you are to what you're experiencing and that you have contemporaries who support you rather than demean you.  I hope you're right, that there is more openness to this and other forms of gender fluidity in the younger generation.  It has been difficult for us older men but the invitation is still the same... to accept our bodies as they are.  Thanks for sharing your story.

Online Johndoe1

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Craig,

Wearing a bra for supporting your breasts is nothing to be ashamed of. I am glad to see you have a wonderful support system as you navigate through all this. If you feel physically better wearing a bra, it's no ones business but yours. Will life be easy as a male with breasts and wearing support for such a feminine trait? Probably not all the time, but as someone who went through my teens and twenties braless but having sizeable breasts who could have benefited from being supported, I wished I had had the courage to do what I needed to do and not let myself be bullied because of my chest.

You are not alone in this journey. There are many of us navigating the same waters successfully.
Womanhood is not defined by breasts, and breasts are not indicative of womanhood. - Melissa Fabello


 

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