Author Topic: 15 - dealing with my breasts  (Read 3711 times)

Offline SideSet

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 As you said, you feel much more comfortable in a bra. You probably look much better, also without all that movement on your chest and your nipples showing through your tops.  

 Your breasts are probably going to continue growing. I would not be at all surprised if you start spilling out of your B cup bras  and find yourself needing to start wearing a C cup.    I am sure your mother will be happy to help you as you keep developing. 

 As you wait and as you grow, I believe you become more and more used to wearing a bra, until you reach the point where it is second nature to put on your bra when you get dressed. I also suspect you may come to embrace having breast, as I have. Breast reduction surgery is not for everybody 

Offline brock123

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Honestly, it sounds to me like you are quite conflicted about this.  You are going to get a lot of very good advice and suggestions here, but based on the dialogue I can't determine if you actually OK with having breasts or not.  The most important thing in my mind would be for you to do whatever makes you the most comfortable with yourself.  What others think, including family, is not nearly as important.  Whatever the end result, you are the one that has to live with the path you take, nobody else can walk that walk for you.

I'm coming from a place where I had an unexpected (and in hindsight - unwanted) amount of breast growth last year. I went through many emotional stages along the way. Be it "coming out" to my wife, who was supportive but quite weird about it, to finally getting the proper doctor(s) and exam(s) taken care of, I wanted to point out that if your body is generating enough Estrogen to grow breasts it's also likely altering your emotions.  Until I got the Estrogen under control, which definitely required professional medical advice, I was not only OK with having my own breasts but was actively researching ways to enhance them! Weird, right? "Hormones be like whaaaa?"

I haven't posted here much, and having been able to find my peace/solace by getting my typical (and only slightly abnormally large) chest back, all I would like to offer to you is that there is nothing wrong with being happy about who you are and how you look.  If you are unhappy with it, that is unfortunate and I would of course recommend remediation.  If you are happy with it, wear what makes you comfortable; anyone that tries to make you feel bad about it isn't worth your time and is most likely suffering from some serious self-esteem issues of their own.

I suggest simply taking the time to sit down and figure out what will make you the happiest.  True friends and family won't care, they will also want you to be happy.

Offline Bailey K

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I really hope they don’t get bigger as it’s going to be difficult to disguise any more. I’m not far off 16 and presume they won’t get bigger. The nipples are female size and the doctor said there were glands underneath them ? My mind was a bit of a blur. 

I was due to go back for tests and a scan but it’s all been put off. So in my head I sort of think I have to live with my boobs and find a way of coping. And a way of coping when I start college where atleast I don’t need a uniform. But think I’m going to still try to hold them down. 

If I’m just in  a t shirt round the house, they stick out like my sisters chest. I’m not fat. So it’s boobs. And I’m aware my hips are a bit wide as my jeans don’t fit as well. So I slob out round the house in a t shirt and jogging bottoms. It just looks strange

Offline JohannK

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They do have a decent chance of getting bigger.

And yes, if it's true gyne then there will be developed glands.  That's what pushes your nipples out, making them "puffy".  You'll probably also be able to feel them behind your nipples.

Since you're not fat, it'll probably already be noticable even if you try to hide them.  So you might as well accept it and not hide them (that doesn't mean you have to show them off, just don't take a bunch of extra measures).  Besides, hiding them also typically means slouching, and that's not healthy by any stretch of the imagination.

At 27 I can't say that I'm at a don't care" age, but I decided that it's not worth worrying.  So I wear button shirts in public (whenever possible), but nothing else.  If people see them, they see them.  It's not as if I can fully hide them anyway, apart from wearing several layers of winter clothes.

p.r.1974

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I may suggest silicone nip petals or covers for coverage without extra padding.

Offline Bailey K

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Do you wear a bra for support? 

Yes, behind my nipples is firm, it’s not fatty. They are sensitive as-well which is why it’s uncomfy against material moving about. They were getting sore and chaffed with bouncing and rubbing. I ran for the bus last year and some sixth formers were laughing and pointing at my chest. Plus on a t shirt etc they show through. I really hope they don’t get bigger. I thought they stop growing about 16 and the bra is a b cup. 

My hair has got longer but just not sure where I head to dealing with this. Not confident to just go out with them in a proper bra or bouncing everywhere without. Plus my mum says they need supporting otherwise I’ll end up with more problems. Certainly may mention the racer bra thing to my mum. I have sort of got used to wearing the tank top sports thing but it’s uncomfy squashing them. It was fine at first but now my boobs are bigger it’s not as easy. Round the house I’m used to the normal bra. The T shirt one makes it look bigger. 

I’m not fat , I’m average so they do stick out. The only people seen them uncovered are the dr and my mum. She said they are just like a girls breasts. 

I was hoping to get a summer job. My mums friend had set me up to work in an office at their building firm. I’m not sure what worries me more, the people in the office or the workers. 

I’m dreading this summer. 

Offline Bailey K

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I may suggest silicone nip petals or covers for coverage without extra padding.
What on earth are they ? Really not sure I could talk to mum about that 

Offline JohannK

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Nipple covers (or nipple petals) are just covers that you stick on to your nipples.  They are handy for preventing/hiding "high beams", and also prevent chafing (which I'm all too familiar with, especially with some winter shirts having a more plastic feel to them).

And what you mentioned about your hips, that's something many of us are also familiar with.  Personally I've suspected some widening in my case, and it seems more and more like the case.  I wear 34" pants, and definitely can't get into anything smaller.  But going by my belt, I should at least drop to 32...

aboywithgirls

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Your story sounds just like mine. It was my grandmother who made a comment about my breasts to my mother and that i could really use a bra. They next day, my mother sat me down with some of my older sister's bras and told me how a bra would help. I wore them at home for a few years. When I was 16, she said that i had gotten large enough that I needed to wear a bra full time. I had gotten used to them by then and agreed with her only if I could have my own. She took me bra shopping. I was officially a 34C.

I ended up having the same chest as my sister. I realized that for me, a bra was a better solution over surgery. I'm a 38H and most men's shirts and pants don't fit my figure so I have also adopted an androgynous look.

I am happy to answer any questions that you may have.

p.r.1974

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Covers, aka petals, do not always have adhesive, and can be worn in a bra with limited or no padding, and still provide for modesty without the bulk and projection of molded cup bras.

Bridge

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Bailey,

  It appears that you are at the point of trying to hold things firm and be the least noticeable.  There are options out there with the many bra choices available.  It sounds like your mum in her efforts to help at this time didn't and perhaps couldn't go to the lengths needed to get you a bra that would work best for your body type and gender.  Perhaps after the coronavirus settles down you will be able to go out and find something at a store selling a wider selection of bras that will work better for you. One that is less "out there" and more of a minimizer bra might be available for you.  I have found many of the back issues is from poor posture as I, and others, tend to slouch to allow our shirts to fall aver our chest more.  Please look for something that will allow you to stand, walk and sit with proper posture with minimal projection.

  As for those you see friends, mates etc. Don't let their words, looks and comments in anyway injure your spirit.  You are you. Period.  Be true to yourself and be strong.  Don't let their Ignorance of this matter affect you.  Sounds like you are in a good place with family and a few friends.

Offline MarcoB

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I'm sure everyone here has a story a little different from everyone else's; but we're here to find and give help about a common problem (and maybe commiserate a little bit too, LOL).  I probably have one of the smallest breasts on the forum, but it (yes, "it," not "they," since I can grab a small handful only on one side) quickly gets sore and irritated if I go without some kind of bra(lette).  When the problem started a few years ago, I didn't even realize yet that there was some breast tissue there.  I thought it was just that for some reason the nipple was extra sensitive to friction on the inside of the shirt.  I got the first sports bra with the intention of using it only when riding bike; but the problem progressed to where I needed something pretty much full time.

At first I was very scared to go out in public with it, but gradually realized no one is searching to see if I'm wearing a bra (although I haven't been in a group of teenagers with one).  I still try to hide it completely, because most people are ignorant about gyne and our need for a bra of some sort, so the whispers and snickers and condemnation would start up, which is not good for anyone.  I wish it were more-common knowledge.  For me, being small, it's mainly about hiding the back; but for you, the same things that help hide the back might reduce the attention the front gets as well.

In addition to the obvious (like having the color closely match your skin's), something I find helps is wearing a starched, plaid cotton shirt over an undershirt.  I'm using Marico's Revive instant starch, which is very easy and really helps hide the bumps and lines.  Now in the winter I'm often using flannel shirts (with no starch).  It still wouldn't pass the "hug test" as someone else here put it, so family gatherings might require wearing a bra that doesn't have the lumps in the back.  Last summer I regularly wore a tank-type pullover bralette under striped polo shirts with collars, and I never saw any evidence that anyone noticed.  I am however looking for a suitable bra with small, actual cups, as I think that would be more comfortable than a bralette that just smashes my breast down.  They're rare in my size though.

Growing your hair and getting a close shave might work to keep others from realizing it's a man with breasts, but I can imagine other ways it would raise eyebrows.  I for one would be extremely uncomfortable in the men's room if I thought that was a woman that just walked in!  My wife and I were standing in the check-out line at the supermarket one time and there was a tall man in front of us dressed as a woman, and very convincingly so, except the height which is very unusual for a woman (and even for a man!), and the manly chin and hands.  He was trying not to talk and give away that he was a man, but eventually was forced to talk a little bit to complete his business with the checker, and his bass voice was another giveaway.  So, take everything into consideration.  I grew up in another country, and kids there really made fun of me and the very few other kids who wore glasses, and in fact wouldn't admit when they needed glasses themselves even if they were obviously blind as a bat.  Here in the States, kids wearing glasses is common, and no one gives it a second thought.  I wish the acceptance of gynecomastia were that way.

Keep us updated.

Offline blad

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I can definitely relate to this thread, having developed breasts at age 13. They were a constant subject of conversation in school with much embarrassment.

You have several advantages on your side. One, you are finished with school and the environment at a college or university is definitely not as intolerant. Second, support from your mom and family and the openness of wearing bras is a game changer with nothing to hide. My mom was aware of my breast development and had taken me to a specialist for tests, but nothing more was ever discussed. It would have been helpful if she introduced the option of trying a bra, like your mother did. I had to navigate wearing a bra on my own and it would have been much easier if my mom was involved. Like you have found, I was aware of the discomfort of being braless and once I tried a bra on my own I realized the need. But unlike me, you are not alone in your situation.

With regard to visibility in public, if you are at all like me there is no hiding your breast outline anyway, with or without a bra. So if you find the right combination of bra style and color that conceals the bra outline as much as possible, you can enjoy the benefits of wearing a bra without much concern at all. In a short while, it is just second nature to put on your bra in the morning and forget you are even wearing one as you are out in public, with no concern that anyone notices. Again, they may noticed you have some breast like features as that is not going to magically disappear, but they will not realize you are wearing a bra.

You are more than half way there with acceptance of wearing a bra and good family support. With a bit of fine tuning your confidence over the situation will make your concerns disappear. 
If the bra fits, wear it.

Offline MarcoB

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Bailey K, with all your use of the word "jumper," I had to look it up.  Apparently in Brittain, it's a pullover sweater.  In the States, a jumper is usually a dress that needs a blouse underneath, like this:

Any updates on the situation?


 

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