Illusions?

[Parity]

JD1,

  I feel for you in the fact that it became "known".  I have to believe you already knew it wasn't a secret. After all how could it be.  This I feel was a gentler way of broaching the topic.  If your family is anything like mine I'm sure there was talk behind the scenes already.  It's my opinion, take it for what its worth, that in the long run this will prove to be better for you emotionally and allow you to not be as self-conscious when interacting with family.  If the subject does arise you have lived with it long enough to have the response ready.  Remember they probably feel as awkward talking about it as you.  Keep being you!
Really, keep being you cause the rest of us are taken.

[Traveler]

And she is the first extended family member to explicitly know that I am aware of.

Wow…
Makes you wonder who else knows in your family. I think I’d take it a little harder too. It’s one thing to deal with nattering at work, and I know you’ve accepted that some people are going to notice, but family? I think she’s letting you know that she knows and maybe wants to talk?

[Johndoe1]

And she is the first extended family member to explicitly know that I am aware of.

Wow…
Makes you wonder who else knows in your family. I think I’d take it a little harder too.

I suspect more do know. They are just not sure. This cousin is not usually a gossiper so I don't think she has been talking. It's obvious she has known for a while and has never let on until the photo. But it is sobering.

It’s one thing to deal with nattering at work, and I know you’ve accepted that some people are going to notice, but family? I think she’s letting you know that she knows and maybe wants to talk?

She might want to. I haven't seen her since she showed me the photo so I'll see what happens next. Could be nothing happens? Most of the family is pretty laid back so I don't expect much. I have been wearing a bra around them for years so I would have thought if any of them were going to say anything, it would have happened long before now.

[Justagirl💃]

My family knew since puberty, and was very vocal about it. My male cousins wanted nothing to do with me, and still don't. 
My female cousins are about 50/50 on if I'm accepted or not. 

My aunts and uncles were very understanding and much more so than my father that his "little boy" didn't turn out to be all boy. 

Family is weird!

[Dudewithboobs]

It is a shame how people respond to it just cause it doesn’t fit THEIR idea. I have no doubt my family would not mind if I came over one day in a fitted shirt and a t shirt bra essentially a type of shirt that would hug my breasts and bra rather conceal it some. A question would be asked. I’d explain just have had this issue awhile and sick of feeling I can’t wear what I want. They’d say right on we’ll long as you’re healthy and ok it’s whatever. 
While I’m certain my wife’s family would condemn it and assume I’m part of some transgender agenda rather than just aiding an issue in a way they aren’t comfortable with. 
It’s a shame we let so many who should not mind cause of our relationships to them, who do mind, dictate how we feel or freedoms we give ourselves to make them happy and avoid their ignorance 

[Gotboobs]

Everyone in my family knows I wear a bra and why. They all know I have boobs. Like my wife as always said...they are really hard to hide unless I dress like  a slob.
Almost a year ago I joined a gym and have a personal trainer. She helps me with my diet and exercise program. I have lost the 25 lbs. my doctor told me to do. Thinking my boobs would go away. I am 5-10 1/2 and weigh 170 pounds now. After all of the diet and exercise I gained 1 inch in my hips. 43 inch hips. Lost 5 inches in waist now at 34. Lost 1 inch in my bust now at 44. Boobs stick out more then ever.☹️. 
I wear sports bras at the gym and people still look at my chest.
Doctor tells me I still have them because of my hormonal imbalance and genetics.
Just crappy luck. I accept my boobs..but would prefer not to have them. 

[Dudewithboobs]

I am sorry you put a tremendous amount of work in to diet and fitness just to find it didn’t just cause things to stick out more but added to it. I go braless at the gym cause I’m still a bit self conscious about it being seen under a wetter shirt when I run a lot and lift. As much as I’d like to believe people are minding their own business I can’t help but assume the obvious signs of a bra may be more apparent than not once sweating. 
I’ve been looking at a good sports bra that is fairly easy to change out of when heading back to work after last week or so feeling my chest bounce more than ever and feeling they’ve grown more. 
Like you I’d prefer to not have them. I don’t mind them. I like them and find them unique. But I know how public situations can be as they become more apparent than disguised. 
I’m glad people you know, know, and don’t mind. Especially the wife and trainer. 

[gotgyne]

I would like my wife to accept me as I am, after all, the physique does not depend on my will.
 
In this regard, I have not met with disappointment, I hope no one among us here.

For my part, I wouldn't want to burden my wife with showing up in a lacy bra, much less expect some kind of affirmation from her.
If one expects such an affirmation, I think it is too much.

It's a different matter when the bra is actually needed for practical reasons.
This is probably the case for some of us.
I don't know at what bust size it is impossible to function without a bra.
In my case, with a size 40C (GB) the potential benefit is negligible in the face of the dilemmas of whether someone will see or not, what a friend or colleague will say, etc. etc.

TikTak, as I see it, your breasts already could need support. I wear the regular Doreen bra in size 40 C myself (the Doreen Luxury is not available in my country). It makes 'pointy' breasts, but in fact the cups are even larger as a C, more than a D in comparison to some other bras. But my wife is not lucky with my wearing too, thus I understand your reservations.
In my opinion your wife is the one who counts, whereas friends or colleagues are not so important. I've worn support and medical compression pantyhose with shorts since 2000, even at work (my job allowed it). My wife was completely okay with it from the beginning. But it was a purely medical issue (several deep vein thromboses). All of my colleagues and my boss know me wearing pantyhose (tights) and so do the customers. The bra with size 40 C is not a medical issue in the strict sense, since I know several women who don't wear a bra at all even with cup D or DD. (Other members of the forum may have a different opinion). So I'd agree to your last sentence regarding your wife but not colleagues or friends.

[gotgyne]

While I’m certain my wife’s family would condemn it and assume I’m part of some transgender agenda rather than just aiding an issue in a way they aren’t comfortable with.
It’s a shame we let so many who should not mind cause of our relationships to them, who do mind, dictate how we feel or freedoms we give ourselves to make them happy and avoid their ignorance

So don't let them dictate how you feel. If your wife is okay with it, it shouldn't matter. But it is possible that how I look upon this is based on the fact, that I always didn't give much on neighbors, colleagues, friends and even relatives.

[oldguy]

Everyone in my family knows I wear a bra and why. They all know I have boobs. Like my wife as always said...they are really hard to hide unless I dress like  a slob.
Almost a year ago I joined a gym and have a personal trainer. She helps me with my diet and exercise program. I have lost the 25 lbs. my doctor told me to do. Thinking my boobs would go away. I am 5-10 1/2 and weigh 170 pounds now. After all of the diet and exercise I gained 1 inch in my hips. 43 inch hips. Lost 5 inches in waist now at 34. Lost 1 inch in my bust now at 44. Boobs stick out more then ever.☹️.
I wear sports bras at the gym and people still look at my chest.
Doctor tells me I still have them because of my hormonal imbalance and genetics.
Just crappy luck. I accept my boobs..but would prefer not to have them.

I get it.  I am recovering from total knee replacement.  Second in 16 months.  I'm down 43 lbs from last surgery.  Still in PT, so I wear exercise pants to appointments.  Those keep falling down, which is a pain.  Don't wear any support to the sessions, because they would create headlights.  Still, even when on my back, for icing, I will notice a glance.  Fortunately, my wife is there, so only that.

Heading out for walks is different.  I wear a tight sports bra and layer.  Still, even I can see them.  So what, I'm feeling great.  I can deal with that.

[TikTak]

Gotgyne, just like for you, only the wife is important.
Friends, family, their insights are important to me only for my personal comfort:
it is always better not to be the object of unhealthy interest.
And if they should already say something there behind my back, think something, then burn them to hell.
My wife once, it was twenty years ago, happened to say something unkind. Back then, my problem was still smaller. I dared to strip to the waist on a hot day, to work in the garden, assuming that, after all, I was among loved ones. Well, and I flunked, probably on the occasion of some other problem.
When my breasts grew really big and I started to despair a little, my wife was very supportive, saying that it was a dispute unworthy of attention.
Once, even when she wanted to do well, she knocked me off my feet, stating that "it's good that in this house someone will finally have a nice bust"

[Benusa2]

Hi John,
I’m happy that you have a new found ally. I agree it sounds like she was trying to let you know that and coming from a place of love. She understands how long your journey has been. Sometimes it takes courage to be kind and it must have taken a bit of courage to bring up a sensitive topic in perhaps the only way she knew how. I hope it’s been healing for you. It sounds like she’s extending an invitation.
The same thing happened to me at that age and I can assure you I made every effort to make sure no photos survived. In recent years I’ve just submitted to the fact that I’m prone to development and that it’s lifelong.
I hope you’re doing well and having a good week. Wishing you the best in dealing with family on the subject.
-Ben

[Johndoe1]

It's a different matter when the bra is actually needed for practical reasons.
This is probably the case for some of us.
I don't know at what bust size it is impossible to function without a bra.
In my case, with a size 40C (GB) the potential benefit is negligible in the face of the dilemmas of whether someone will see or not, what a friend or colleague will say, etc. etc.

The benefit of a bra is when you say it is. Size doesn't matter usually. It has more to do with self comfort and that could be physical, that could be mental. Personally, it got real for me when I started to jog. I had been feeling the need for support for a long time, but couldn't bring myself to do it. I had no idea I was as large as I was. I thought I was a large B or small C. My first official fitting had me at DD! Anyway, before that, I got a nasty rash in my IMF and that started the serious thought process of getting them off my chest, literally. In the mean time, I started an exercise program that included jogging. The physical pain from the bouncing was agonizing. It felt like my breasts were being ripped off my chest as they bounced up and down in time with my jogging. I had a talk with the doctor I was seeing for this exercise program. In my case, the doctor happen to be female. She examined my chest and said I had three options. Surgery, live with the pain or wear support and she said I should consider support in the short term if nothing else to avoid injury to my breasts when exercising if I was considering surgery. The rest, is history, as they say.