Gyne sucks

[Snake]

Sorry, I just have to vent.  The other day I was a little late for work because I had to choose some kind of shirt that hides my chest and nothing works.  I wasn't satisfied and dreaded looking forward to a day of working feeling so uncomfortable.  I ended up wearing a sweatshirt type of thing and I was roasting all day long.

I have debt so I can't get surgery and was recently denied a loan.  I just don't make enough money so I don't see me being able to solve this problem at any time in the near future.  My posture is bad, my self esteem is low.  I can be pretty quiet which hurts my chances of advancing at work.  One of my supervisors thought I was someone else.  Uggghh.  Most days I can deal pretty good but I'm just getting tired of this.

I even have a trip planned for summer and all I can think of is how I'm going to hide my puffy nips instead of what I'll be doing on my trip.  This is just absolutely ridiculous.

[tonysoprano]

Im with you pal.

Ive spent the last 5 years buying nothing, wearing the same old gyne-friendly clothes, working a go-nowhere job, and declining all kinds of career,social,romantic,sexual and personal invitations all in preparation for the beginning of a new life being gyne free.

that was supposed to finally be realised a year ago , in march 2005.
my surgical improvement to me has been  around 30-40%, which I consider close to worthless. IMHO if someone has say a 10 inch port-wine stain on their face or a 5-inch one, or even a 3-inch, theres still a fukkin port-wine stain there. unless it gets down to 1-inch and smaller its still the same problem mentally.

sorry for the craap analogy, but thats how I feel about my gyne improvement. although It is much better than pre-op, nothing has changed in terms of my feelings, perception of my body and what activities I will/wont do.
and until I ever geto 90%+ improvement, I dont think ill ever be able to reconcile this whole thing, that dominates all my thoughts all day every day year after year, season through season. it has compltely eroded my personality and most else about me. to make it worse people are always complimenting me on various qualities they find in me, whether physical, personal, moral or empathetic, however I am so suffocated by my 'secret' that I cant function enough to recognise any of my other qualities let alone acknowledge that someone else has noticed them.

I feel like my life is just wasting away, while all my friends are travelling, marrying, advancing their careers, buying homes,becoming reputable/famous, having kids etc.

I am 26 now and am exactly where I was in life at 19, except I am now a lot more emotionally and psychologically  burdened than I have ever been, and life is just a battle working towards 1 thing.  This goal that most others I know wouldnt possibly believe could be the primary goal in the life of a young guy in his mid-20s.

were all in this same boat man, no matter how we differ in terms of gyne severity on the 1-10 scale, we are all equally affected by our own cases in our own rights.

pheew.. thatd all been building up for the last couple of months- just had to type some shixt outta my system-

[Worrier]

What you say chimes with me. Gyne just interferes with how you want to live your life.

I hear you with the sweat shirt thing. Before I lost weight, I was the only person wearing a leather jscket in the summer. People must have thought I was fuc*ing nuts.

Then you sweat and you get self concious about that.

The other day I was at the gym, and there was a girl talking to me about something and  when I went into the changing area she followed me. (we don't have proper changing rooms just a little alcove where you pay ).Naturally I didn't want to take my t-shirt off in front of her but what could I do stand there like a lemon?

So in the end I had to turn away from her and take it off. I felt fu*king ridiculous. Not really about the gyno but what it made me do.Despite the fact that other people say it isn't noticable but I do have a puffy nip and it really gets me down.Now that girl is a really nice person and if she did see something I seriously doubt she would make a joke but I just get tired of it.

I can't afford a decent ps at the mo just the nhs in the uk who don't want to operate as they think it isn't bad enough and there would be scars so all I can say is save your pennies and try not to let it mess everything else up. Easier said than done I know. :-/  

[ScottLastName]

Gyne is the pits.

I am a very active person, I have played sports all my life however I have always had to wear a dark undershirt or singlet underneath all my clothes and missed out on representative teams because you are required to take a shower etc.

I have had puffy nipples since I was 11 or 12, I am now turning 16 and have had surgery. It's been two months and there is only a minimal change which makes me very angry. Every year of my highschool I have never once been able to go to a swimming carnival or been able to participate in swimming, which sucks because I used to be a surflife saver and an active swimmer. I have also got detentions for not swimming >.<

I don't know what to do, I am at the point of doing self surgery....

[Hypo-is-here]

Sorry, I just have to vent.  The other day I was a little late for work because I had to choose some kind of shirt that hides my chest and nothing works.  I wasn't satisfied and dreaded looking forward to a day of working feeling so uncomfortable.  I ended up wearing a sweatshirt type of thing and I was roasting all day long.

I'm nodding like a nodding dog Snake- I have done that Soooooo many times.  

It is very distressing.

I am post op now and I don't have that anymore, but WOW yes I really identify with what you are talking about.

It took me a very long arduous journey to reach where I am now- but I got there in the end.

You will get where you want to be eventually as well.

Good luck to you my man and hey vent your spleen whenever you want, that is what the board is for- getting some of the psychological burden out of your system- at least a little.

P.S

I once played tennis in 90+ degree heat with a massive fleece top on    and I know the anguish of constantly trying to find clothing to hide the problem and thinking "no, no, no" as each shirt fails to hide the issue, all the time looking at the clock "thinking I'm going to be late for work".

It takes guts to do what you are doing, your gutsy and you WILL get where you want to be- don't forget that!!!

[Snake]

Thanks for the replies.  Every now and then its just good to know I'm not the only one going through this.  

[Paa_Paw]

Is it fair to hope that you have at least some kind of medical insurance available to you?

Gynecomastia is not a condition that usually has any direct physical problems though it can sometimes be a symptom of a problem.  The effects are primarily psychological and they can be devastating.

You need to see a doctor and get a thorough physical. Most Insurance policies will cover that.  Then you might need a referral to an Endocrinologist.  Another possibility would be a referral to a Psychologist.

Sometimes a letter from an understanding Psychologist will help get surgery covered by an Insurance company that would otherwise refuse that coverage.

What have you got to lose?

Good Luck

[Snake]

It is just a puffy nipples situation.  It looks even odder on an otherwise slim guy like me.    

Unfortunately, I don't have insurance at all at this point.  I'm at the awkward stage where I've finished college and am too old to be covered by parents, yet I don't have a decent enough job yet to pay insurance out of pocket.  I'm in a transitory phase in life.  

However, I have been working out.  Nowhere near the washboard abs or anything but it sure helps my posture out.

Its funny that some of you have mentioned changing my attitude.  I am reading a psychology book about changing your perception of life from a failure personality type to a success personality type.  And its written by a plastic surgeon.  Its called Psycho Cybernetics and I recommend it to anyone on this board with esteem problems.  Basically, the message is too program your brain to think positively.  Live life now and don't wait for that magical point in the future when you are free of gyne (or whatever it is) to actually start living your life.

Live your life the way you wish it to be now and everything will fall into place.  Its tough advice to follow, I know.  Being positive won't magically get me five grand to get rid of my man lumps, but it can't hurt.  It makes sense to me.  Change the way you act and people will change how they act toward you.  Act like you are worthy of that job or that girl and you will achieve your goals.

I have a failure type of personality of which gyne is partly to blame.  If I change this, maybe I can get a better job and in turn, afford my surgery.  I always think that I can't be happy now, because I have gyne.  This type of attitude is holding me back from going anywhere even though I have finished college.  

Anyway, I've blabbered on enough.  Hopefully this advice will be of use to someone.  I am only really beginning to follow it myself.  So far, so good.

[Shaman]

There's this kid in my PE class(it's a major pain in the butt) who has puffy nips and I've never heard him get grief for it. He is a wrestler though, so he's ripped but abs seem to cancel it out.

[bogieman]

you hang in there my friend. Im 40 and just got it fixed and ill tell you i identified with each and every thing you said- I was the popular kid in school though and had all that going for me but lived this dirty little secret since i was 13. passed up dates sex women all because of my insecurities. save save and then save some more and just hang in there- life is short