Hi Everyone.
First of all I'd like to say what an amazing site this is and what an inspiration it has been reading everyone's posts. I wish I'd discovered it sooner.
Anyway, here is my story about my gyne. I've never shared it with ANYONE before, so writing this is a pretty big thing for me. By the way, I'm 20 yrs old at present, and am due for surgery in 3 weeks.
It started when I was 12/13, with the dreaded *breast-buds*. I don't know if everyone got these, but they are these UNBELIEVABLY PAINFUL and sensitive little bumps underneath the nipples. I wince just thinking about them. I remember one time at school being hit on the left side with a tennis ball. I was in agonizing pain, but i had to carry on like nothing had happened as all the other boys were looking at me wondering why there were tears in my eyes. That was so hard, and the memory will always stay with me.
Around the same time of my life, in the changing room for P.E, someone saw me when i was undressed and reaching down to pick something up. They shouted "hey, John's got breasts!", and suddenly all eyes were on me. I just wanted to sink into the ground and i remember going home crying and not getting out of bed for a week. My mum understood the situation, as i had alerted her to the breast buds a year or so before, as i thought it might be cancer.
When i was 16, I became pretty depressed and was put on prozac (which resulted in an attempted suicide and drug abuse) and then seroxat which turned me into a zombie practically. My mum took me off the tablets, and as a result i just got on with life and became very thin (almost anorexic). The result of this was the gyne subsided a bit but was definitely still there. It got me down a lot.
Then at about 18 i got better, put on weight and the gyne came back with avengeance. It continued to plague me, and my self-confidence was damaged (as was my posteur!)
After a few trips to the doctor where he kept saying i couldn't get surgery on the NHS, i decided to look into going private. I was given a quote of around £4,000. I decided this was too much and would just learn to live with it.
Then University came (last September). Everything was going well, except the heightened social life meant going out a lot more, and keeping up with fashion trends. My gyne was standing out and becoming a real problem.
To get over this, I stated putting plasters (band-aids) over my erect nipples before putting on t-shirts and things. This seemed to work ok for a bit... BUT after a few consecutive nights of doing this, I woke up one morning with the most shocking, seering & burning pain over my nipples. It was absolute agony. I went straight to the shower but the water made it even worse! I ended up sitting at the bottom of the shower just crying, in pain.
Then, later on in the day, i was in a lecture (still in pain) and something came over me. I think my actual thoughts were "RIGHT, F*CK THIS", and i decided there and then that i was going to have surgery. I went home, looked at my bank balances (i'd been saving from working the previous year) and i had a nice overdraft from my bank. I just needed to take out a £500 loan and i realised it could be sorted out.
So here I am, almost at the end of my gyne (i know surgery doesn't absolutley guarantee success).
I can't believe i'm actually only 3 weeks away from having it done. I'm excited, scared, happy, even sad, all at the same time.
It's been really great sharing all this with you.
Please please feel free to reply to this post or even message me.
Thanks for reading.
Keep your heads held high, guys.
John1984
Topic: My story - to the end (Read 3914 times)
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