Re: Women

[letmeknow]

Hey guys, i'm looking for some advice on situation. I'm 18 5'8 170 lbs with moderate but very noticeable gyne. I hate how it stands out so i conceal it with underarmour and now with a ace bandage. I've had a few girls that had crushes on me but i never had the courage to ask them out cause 1. if theres contact she'll notice the bandage and 2. find out about gyne.

What do you guys suggest?

[Mr_Nip]

I know you'll see a lot of people dissagree with me on this because I've said it before here and that's what happened.  I think that most of those people probably are not as experienced in these matters as I am.  I'm 42 and I had more experience at 18 than most of the guys I knew who didn't have gyne.      

My advice:

Ditch the Underarmour and toss away the bandage under your clothes.  Show confidence and act as if you don't notice the gyne.  That's what girls are looking for.  If you'll notice, there are a LOT of flat-chested guys who never get dates.  They lack confidence.  If you ask a girl out with confidence and she can see that you've got nips through your clothes, she's going to be attracted to your confidence and the fact that you are noticing her - She's not likely to think much of your chest.   Once she's into you to the point that you are taking off your shirt, it's not going to matter to her because she already knows and doesn't care.  Make yourself go out and be around people without the bandage and practice acting confident.  Make yourself start conversations with the girls in general and then girls you're interested in.  I think that it may take a little practice to change your confidence level, but you can be sure it'll make your relationships get past a date or two.  What happens if you're wearing a bandage under there when she slips her hand under your shirt?  If you don't wear the stuff under there to hide it, then she'll not be surprised by anything she finds under there.      

By the way, I just read this to my wife and she agreed with every word.   

Think about it. 

[flex1appeal]

Listen to mr nip. He speaks wisdom! I 100% agree!

flex

[letmeknow]

Yeah, i figured thats the solution but i dont have the confidence and self esteem to do that yet. Well hopefully ill have surgery towards the end of summer. Hopefully ill last. Thanks.

[normexcept]

Real confidence only comes after success.  Before that it is will power.  You can will yourself to make the steps that the others suggested.  Act with confidence.  Hold your head up.  Through your shoulders back.  Look the other person in the eye.  Smile.  Make small talk by asking questions about the other person (not yourself).  Look at people around you that seem confident.  Not what they look like but what they act like.  Copy those things even if they feel fake.  After success you will feel confidence.

I know this condition erodes your confidence. It has mine over the years.  But I have employed the above techniques when I realize I am in the state you just described, and gues what, it works for me.  I've found that people respond less to visual when there is something stronger like personality or confidence involved.

[flex1appeal]

When I had gyne, I didn't have confidence but still displayed it despite that. If you show any attention to your own gyne then you only draw attention to it. You know you don't have confidence but that doesn't mean anyone else has to know. Just pretend you are an actor in a movie playing a part.

flex

[Spleen]

Mr. Nip offers good advice.  Like Nip I'm also more than twice yer age.  Trust the old guys; chicks won't really notice or care.

[gyneman]

I had a minor case and women never gave them 2 looks besides , WoW, you have a nice chest. Even though I had it at the time and never stopped me from having relationships with woman. They are more concerned about being treated good and having someone who compliments them. IMO, personality is more important to women than a guy with great pecs. Seriously!! They are more concerned about themselves just like we are!!

[Mr_Nip]

i remember my gf said ooh you have boobs. at the time it killed me but we proceeded doing whatever it was in bed we started. it sucks but will be noticed be strong and act like its no big deal and it wont be. i am married now with the same girl. btw that happend 9 years ago lol it sticks with u.

That's a good point.  Some girls may mention them but that doesn't necessarily mean they are negative.  They may even like them.  That's right.  You said she didn't stop in bed, right?  That just proves what we're all saying here.  In most cases your chest doesn't matter to a girl if she likes you enough to take your relationship to that level.  So she notices it?... So what!... You ended up marrying the girl who called attention to your chest because she loved YOU.  Congrats. 

[andres]

What really matters in a relationship is your and your partner's own happiness. Really. You are young and may not think that anything or anyone will lead to acceptance or accept you, but be warned, they will! When you truly connect with a woman and honor her for who she really is and support her in what she loves to do, and find out what truly impassions her, it doesn't matter what your body is like. Truly! The body is only a thin first layer in a real relationship that matters. I know firsthand it's tough to understand, b/c it took me a lot of suffering and anguish to realize this, but it's true. If she doesn't accept you and your body from some socially programmed taboo, then screw it! It wasn't ment to be. Keep your head up and go on. Ditch the straps and overly baggy cloths and the underdog attitude. They'll only weigh you down.

Let yourself be as open as possible and keep that confidence high. Woman want to be honored for being people and are . They are attracted to a happy and open personality more than anything, and are attracted to, as was so well said before, being the focus of attention. just be yourself and good luck out there!


~a

[Paa_Paw]

Go back and re-read the comments by Mr_Nip and Spleen. They are dead right!

As for me, I've had Gynecomastia since age of 12.  That was in 1949, I will be 70 next month.

[Mr_Nip]

Go back and re-read the comments by Mr_Nip and Spleen. They are dead right!

As for me, I've had Gynecomastia since age of 12.  That was in 1949, I will be 70 next month.

This man could teach us all a few things about confidence and women.   

Happy birthday, Paa!