Huge problem

[tartan_tiger]

Well, I developed gynecomastia when I was 13 and prior to that I had been doing athletics year round and the thing that I enjoyed most and was best at was swimming. I was told by my coaches that if I kept improving and working hard I might have had a shot at going to the trials in the future. Unfortunately, I developed gynecomastia and it's been seven years and I haven't been in a pool since I first developed the breasts. Well, I finally talked to my doctor about solving the problem because it has been ruining my life, I didn't do any sports in high school so I didn't get into the sort of college I could have and I didn't even go to college because of it. Well, he told me what I probably could have found here pretty easily in that insurance does not cover it. Here's the problem for me, I also have moderate hemophilia which is a bleeding disorder where the person has very poor clotting. Because of this, any sort of surgery is going to be extremely expensive considering I need transfusions of recombinant factor which is in the neighborhood of $2000 a dose and I would need 4 doses a day for probably three or four days around the time of the surgery. This would all be out of pocket and I cannot afford it but I can't live with this. I've never had a girlfriend, I wear multiple layers even in the summer, and I don't play the sports I used to love so much. I miss swimming so much and being able to go to the beach and have my shirt off and not feel so ashamed and depressed, I can't even look in the mirror when I'm taking a shower without feeling overwhelming rage and hatred. I really have no idea what I should do.

[Dave_8]

Damn dude. When I look at your problem, then myself, I feel like I have it pretty easy. But seriously dude, the only thing you can do is start saving cash and making goals and achieving them one at a time.

[tartan_tiger]

Damn dude. When I look at your problem, then myself, I feel like I have it pretty easy. But seriously dude, the only thing you can do is start saving cash and making goals and achieving them one at a time.

It's just so discouraging because this has been ruining my life and has irreversibly altered the course of my life and I'm told that it is "cosmetic." I also got a referral to a psychiatrist but I'm not sure how much that will help when the major underlying problem cannot be properly addressed. Usually the best way to fix things is to remove the cause and not medicate the effect. I don't know, it's not like I really even have anyone who I can trust or tell in real life so I pretty much suffer in silence.

[GynO_DuDe]

Wow mate, the more I read on this forum, theirs always some one new with a deeper more complicated problem than the one before ... I dunno what to say mate, saving up must feel like a long shot, but it REALLY is the ONLY option ... most people have to pay for their surgeries, I had to pay £4000 which is nearly $8000 but I managed too, made sacrifices (im still a student).

Your focus now should be on getting employed & simply working, working, working ... save up that cash and hopefully in the years to come you can have it sorted no problem.

You could also look in to finance, only if you know you can make the monthly repayments and if you think its worth it which sounds like it most probably will be ...

[tartan_tiger]

Wow mate, the more I read on this forum, theirs always some one new with a deeper more complicated problem than the one before ... I dunno what to say mate, saving up must feel like a long shot, but it REALLY is the ONLY option ... most people have to pay for their surgeries, I had to pay £4000 which is nearly $8000 but I managed too, made sacrifices (im still a student).

Your focus now should be on getting employed & simply working, working, working ... save up that cash and hopefully in the years to come you can have it sorted no problem.

You could also look in to finance, only if you know you can make the monthly repayments and if you think its worth it which sounds like it most probably will be ...

I work full time but it's tough because I have many living expenses and it's expensive living in a major city. It's not like I could move home and save because my mother and I do not get along and my dad died when I was a child so even though I do make quite a bit of money I got smacked with taxes, health insurance, living expenses, etc. Even if I save $1000 a month that still's almost three years and $30k is probably the low end of the price spectrum. I know the only other surgery I've ever had was my circumcision which was $35,000 and that was done when I was little and did not need as much factor so I'm scared to even think how much this could potentially cost. It's so discouraging because all my friends went off to college and are enjoying college and partying and going to the beach in the summer and dating, I've never even kissed a girl and 23 for my first date... I don't even think a girl would want to go out with a guy that's 23 and never had a date.

[mrpower33]

Holy crap, your circumcision cost $35,000?  Where the heck do you live?  What kind of health insurance do you have?  That's terrible man.  I'm not sure what to tell you except to work harder and save more money.  I was thinking about your post in the shower earlier today, and you know, we are all dealt with the cards we got when we were born.  Some of us are more fortunate and some less.  But at the end of the day, all we have is this body that God gave us and the will to make a better life for ourselves.  Purpose and motion, that's it.  I know it may sound trite, but you just got to suck it up and play the hand you were dealt.  The truth is, there is just no other option.  Be thankful for what you got and work for what you don't.  I wish things were better for you, but there are many others who have it worse.  I know that is little consolation, but that's life. 

[tartan_tiger]

Holy crap, your circumcision cost $35,000?  Where the heck do you live?  What kind of health insurance do you have?  That's terrible man.  I'm not sure what to tell you except to work harder and save more money.  I was thinking about your post in the shower earlier today, and you know, we are all dealt with the cards we got when we were born.  Some of us are more fortunate and some less.  But at the end of the day, all we have is this body that God gave us and the will to make a better life for ourselves.  Purpose and motion, that's it.  I know it may sound trite, but you just got to suck it up and play the hand you were dealt.  The truth is, there is just no other option.  Be thankful for what you got and work for what you don't.  I wish things were better for you, but there are many others who have it worse.  I know that is little consolation, but that's life. 

complications of the genetic disorder make things cost much more which was the point I was making. I also appreciate the completely and utterly useless advice of suck it up, not exactly what I was expecting from someone here.

[Merangue]

I really feel for you here. You have it worse than a lot of us.

However, you should be thankful it isn't full blown hemophilia. There's still hope, better than no hope.

Like others have suggested, start saving. Start cutting expenses. Don't make excuses, just do what needs to be done.

Also you could try losing weight if you're overweight. It won't reduce gland but it will help with the fat in there.

[mrpower33]

I don't mean to be insensitive, and I really do feel bad for you, but it seems to me that truly useless advice would be for everyone here to just tell you how sorry we feel for you.  Don't you think?  What exactly were you expecting?

[tartan_tiger]

I really feel for you here. You have it worse than a lot of us.

However, you should be thankful it isn't full blown hemophilia. There's still hope, better than no hope.

Like others have suggested, start saving. Start cutting expenses. Don't make excuses, just do what needs to be done.

Also you could try losing weight if you're overweight. It won't reduce gland but it will help with the fat in there.

It's full blown just not severe (under 1% clotting factor) Mines at 3% which is better than almost zero. As for overweight, I don't really think I'm over weight as I'm at 6' and about 160 lbs. I was just hoping that there would be some sort of brilliant eureka sort of idea that would make things not as difficult but that does not appear to be the case unfortunately. Shame heh.

[tartan_tiger]

I don't mean to be insensitive, and I really do feel bad for you, but it seems to me that truly useless advice would be for everyone here to just tell you how sorry we feel for you.  Don't you think?  What exactly were you expecting?

Less useless than saying "don't be a bitch and suck it up" because while useless, it's also completely insensitive. I was hoping someone might have some creative idea that wasn't something I already thought of. I knew it was probably a long shot but worth a try before I start trudging through years of saving and lighting on fire a pile of cash the size of a down payment on a house.

[Dave_8]

mrpower, I dont think he was looking forward to us feeling sorry for him. He was just trying to take a load off his back because of how much shit he has to deal with. Better out then in. And tartan_tiger, you said saving $1000 per month would take 3 years to save up to $30,000? Gyne surgery only cost from $5,000 to $10,000. So maybe 5 months?

[tartan_tiger]

mrpower, I dont think he was looking forward to us feeling sorry for him. He was just trying to take a load off his back because of how much shit he has to deal with. Better out then in. And tartan_tiger, you said saving $1000 per month would take 3 years to save up to $30,000? Gyne surgery only cost from $5,000 to $10,000. So maybe 5 months?

There is the additional cost of factor transfusions for before the surgery and after which run about $2000 a dose and I would need 4 doses a day. It's needed to bring my factor levels up to that which normal people enjoy so that I don't bleed to death.

[Merangue]

I really feel for you here. You have it worse than a lot of us.

However, you should be thankful it isn't full blown hemophilia. There's still hope, better than no hope.

Like others have suggested, start saving. Start cutting expenses. Don't make excuses, just do what needs to be done.

Also you could try losing weight if you're overweight. It won't reduce gland but it will help with the fat in there.

It's full blown just not severe (under 1% clotting factor) Mines at 3% which is better than almost zero. As for overweight, I don't really think I'm over weight as I'm at 6' and about 160 lbs. I was just hoping that there would be some sort of brilliant eureka sort of idea that would make things not as difficult but that does not appear to be the case unfortunately. Shame heh.

Ah, I'm sorry to hear that. Also at that weight/height you're probably on the skinny side. How would you rate your chest (cup size? fat:gland ratio?)? Maybe post some pics so we can get a better idea. It could just be in your head since you're not over weight.

Mr.power has a point but he may have been a bit harsh in his wording. Definitely don't wallow in the pity. It just isn't good in the long run. Try to stay constructive.

Have you tried financing? There are many companies that offer it for surgical procedures. It could cover all or a significant portion of the costs.

In terms of the transfusion is it possible to get family/friend donors to cut the cost of blood (which can be pretty high)?

Last scenario: It's a stretch but could be the magical solution you were hoping for.... ready?....

Move to Canada. Lol, silly but may work. Our public health care comes in quite handy up here for gyne surgery. Excision of gland is covered 100% (including hospital fees, anesthesia, etc) for all provinces except Quebec I believe. We just pay for the lipo portion up here (cosmetic procedures are not covered, however even this winds up being cheaper since all your hospital fees are being covered through the excision). Most Canadians pay around $2000 CAD for excision+lipo with Dr. Fielding (best in Canada).

Arguably, you may be able to get your transfusion covered since it would be required for your condition. You can look up each provinces health care coverage and see if any cover it, than apply for immigration or look for a job or something in the province.

A stretch but... there's hope. Don't give up.

[tartan_tiger]

I really feel for you here. You have it worse than a lot of us.

However, you should be thankful it isn't full blown hemophilia. There's still hope, better than no hope.

Like others have suggested, start saving. Start cutting expenses. Don't make excuses, just do what needs to be done.

Also you could try losing weight if you're overweight. It won't reduce gland but it will help with the fat in there.

It's full blown just not severe (under 1% clotting factor) Mines at 3% which is better than almost zero. As for overweight, I don't really think I'm over weight as I'm at 6' and about 160 lbs. I was just hoping that there would be some sort of brilliant eureka sort of idea that would make things not as difficult but that does not appear to be the case unfortunately. Shame heh.

Ah, I'm sorry to hear that. Also at that weight/height you're probably on the skinny side. How would you rate your chest (cup size? fat:gland ratio?)? Maybe post some pics so we can get a better idea. It could just be in your head since you're not over weight.

Mr.power has a point but he may have been a bit harsh in his wording. Definitely don't wallow in the pity. It just isn't good in the long run. Try to stay constructive.

Have you tried financing? There are many companies that offer it for surgical procedures. It could cover all or a significant portion of the costs.

In terms of the transfusion is it possible to get family/friend donors to cut the cost of blood (which can be pretty high)?

Last scenario: It's a stretch but could be the magical solution you were hoping for.... ready?....

Move to Canada. Lol, silly but may work. Our public health care comes in quite handy up here for gyne surgery. Excision of gland is covered 100% (including hospital fees, anesthesia, etc) for all provinces except Quebec I believe. We just pay for the lipo portion up here (cosmetic procedures are not covered, however even this winds up being cheaper since all your hospital fees are being covered through the excision). Most Canadians pay around $2000 CAD for excision+lipo with Dr. Fielding (best in Canada).

Arguably, you may be able to get your transfusion covered since it would be required for your condition. You can look up each provinces health care coverage and see if any cover it, than apply for immigration or look for a job or something in the province.

A stretch but... there's hope. Don't give up.

Definitely no pictures. I can't even look at myself in the mirror without a shirt on there's no way I could actually take pictures. My doctor agreed that it is gynecomastia and as for how much there is, it's definitely a handful and I have pretty large hands. My breasts are probably almost as large as my older sisters. Part of the reason it bothers me so much is that other than the breasts, I'm pretty lean which makes it stand out more I feel like. It's mostly glandular I would think considering I don't have that much body fat on my chest, stomach, etc just at the base under my nipples where I can feel the breast tissue.

That is pretty lucky actually. I do have a bunch of friends who live up in canada and although I'm not too familiar with the specifics of the healthcare plan don't you have to be a citizen? I thought about the transfusions maybe being covered but the insurance companies here in the states try as hard as possible to screw you over so I'd be shocked if they'd cover something that the only reason it is needed is because I'd be getting an operation they consider cosmetic. I think it'd probably fall under the same category as anesthesia and what not.