Author Topic: I'm at an all time low right now.....however I'm so relieved to find all of you.  (Read 10626 times)

hammer

  • Guest
That is a nice old saying, isn't it! if you can't say something nice.........

I also think it is wrong to call gynecomastia a deformity! One Sunday morning I was watching my local Fox 9 news and they had a local doctor on as they do every Sunday. One of the subjects they talked about was gynecomastia.

This doctor said ( and I have heard it else where ) that gynecomastia affects 60% of the male population at some time in there life! That is 60%, now when I went to school, that figure would be a majority!

I know that it states, at sometime in there life! So I find it very hard to beleave or understand that someone can call this a deformity if a majority will have a problem with it at sometime in there life. Having a third breast, now that would be a deformity!

What we need to do here is to support each other, as we all have gynecomastia to some degree ( or some may think they do )! Whether you have surgery or decide to live with in, or want to have surgery but can not afford it, let's stop all this damn fighting and be here to help each other!


Thanks for reading this, and may God Bless you,

Bob aka Hammer

Offline xelnaga13

  • Senior Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 518
That is a nice old saying, isn't it! if you can't say something nice.........

I also think it is wrong to call gynecomastia a deformity! One Sunday morning I was watching my local Fox 9 news and they had a local doctor on as they do every Sunday. One of the subjects they talked about was gynecomastia.

This doctor said ( and I have heard it else where ) that gynecomastia affects 60% of the male population at some time in there life! That is 60%, now when I went to school, that figure would be a majority!

I know that it states, at sometime in there life! So I find it very hard to beleave or understand that someone can call this a deformity if a majority will have a problem with it at sometime in there life. Having a third breast, now that would be a deformity!

What we need to do here is to support each other, as we all have gynecomastia to some degree ( or some may think they do )! Whether you have surgery or decide to live with in, or want to have surgery but can not afford it, let's stop all this damn fighting and be here to help each other!


Thanks for reading this, and may God Bless you,

Bob aka Hammer

Amen! Let's let this be the final word.

Offline jazzer

  • Posting Member
  • *
  • Posts: 29
srnd2012, I'm from Alberta as well and had a wonderful experience with my surgery, even though I had to jump through a few hoops. I've had large breasts since I was about 20 and had the operation at age 58. I thought I was doomed to wear dress shirts forever until I found out that I could have my surgery covered under Alberta Health. Mind you it took approx. 2 years from first consultation with my M.D. to surgery. But it was well worth the wait.

My chest isn't perfect, and it's doubtful I'll go shirtless anytime soon. But I knew that going in. I was told I'd need a double mastectomy and free nipple graft, and that a large scar would remain for some time. But, I can wear golf shirts and Tees anytime. And I can't tell you how you'll feel psychologically with your operation. Like a new person. Anyway, you've made a great decision and I hope things turn out ok for you. Take care.

  

Offline Grandpa Bambu

  • Senior Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 5444
  • 31 Year Gynecomastia Victim...
Gentleman,

Breast enlargement is not the end of the world, you will not die from gynecomastia. Some men can deal with it and some can not, how you handle having or developing breasts is up to you. Acceptance comes from self confidence, no one can make you feel bad about yourself except yourself. Surgery is always an option but be careful because if you convince yourself that cosmetic surgery will solve you problems you are sadly mistaken. Fix the issue in-between your ears and the rest of your perceived problems will come into perspective.

For you younger men, I understand your need to be accepted by your peers and the ladies. If you are strong enough you will soon learn who are your "true" friends, the same goes for the ladies, if she is a loving caring, intelligent woman then she will accept you as you are for who you are. Ignore the self centered stuck-up bitches, finding a lady is a numbers game, the more you meet the greater your chances of finding one or more winners. Generally if you are kind, intelligent, witty, generous, romantic and passionate finding the kind of ladies you are interested in fairly simple. While the occasional bimbo is fun for a few weeks, having the ability to share experiences, build new memories together and hold an intellectual conversation will last far longer the a few fun romps.



You are correct there my friend... Having Gynecomastia is NOT the END of the WORLD... However, having to 'LIVE WITH' Gynecomastia, greatly reduces the QUALITY of LIFE the sufferer has.

While it is true that if one has BDD (Body Dysmorphic Disorder) as well as Gyencomastia, there will be onging issues after surgery... However, for the average guy with Gyne, I highly doubt the he 'also' dealing with BDD. Speaking for myself, I had surgery almost 8 years ago and have enjoyed every single day of living without the 'CURSE'... I do not have BDD!!!


You stated:"Generally if you are kind, intelligent, witty, generous, romantic and passionate finding the kind of ladies you are interested in fairly simple".

How would those ladies know that the Gyne sufferer has those kind of qualities when they won't even give a 'second look'. For on the 'first look' they saw 'BREASTS' and ran away...  ??? :'( ???   I had bigger breasts than most females that I know...   :-\

While it is good to raise the issue of BBD, I would tend to think that BBD does not play a role in most Gynecomastia cases...

GB...

Surgery: February 16, 2005. - Toronto, Ontario Canada.
Surgeon: Dr. John Craig Fielding   M.D.   F.R.C.S. (C) (416.766.8890)
Pre-Op/Post-Op Pics

Offline TigerPaws

  • Senior Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 587
Grandpa Bambu,

With all due respect many men including myself do not have a problem with having breasts (I have fully formed 38C breasts on a trim body and yes I have bigger and firmer breasts than one of the ladies I am currently seeing and she is a former Playboy Centerfold). Additionally I have had very little issues with the ladies, those who were put off or expressed themselves negatively they were never seen again. There are many intelligent and beautiful women in the world, finding a woman who accepts and enjoys me as I am is not all that difficult. Far too many men wrap up their total self worth in what they see in the mirror.

I and many others on this site have not suffered any quality of life issues and speaking for myself I am not suffering in the slightest, mentally, physically or in regards to attracting the ladies.

If a man wants surgery then that is his decision and his decision alone. The surgery may come out perfectly but like women getting breast augmentation the results may not be what they expected. With any surgical procedure there are risks, from being permanently disabled, deformed or even death. While it sounds like you made it through the surgery without any ramifications, if you look through this forum, many others did not.

There is no one answer as the decision to live with what and who you are or to attempt to change yourself through any surgical procedure; be that a bilateral mastectomy or some other cosmetic surgery.

There is only what works for each individual
.  

 
« Last Edit: September 24, 2012, 07:27:26 AM by TigerPaws »

Offline Grandpa Bambu

  • Senior Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 5444
  • 31 Year Gynecomastia Victim...
"There is only what works for each individual."

TP...

That statement sums it all up doesn't it!!! To each his own.  ;)

You're dating a former PLAYBOY Centerfold... NICE!!!  You DAWG!!!

My hat is off to you my friend! You take your disfigurement in stride. Good for you!!! Many others who are burdened with this affliction, find it very difficult to bear the intense fear/humilliation of being publically ridiculed by his peers... such as I did.

I'm fully aware that surgery has its inherent risks and am fully aware that some of the members on this site have had less-than 'expected' results... Have you heard of having 'Realistic Expectations' of surgery results? Many Gynecomastic sufferers 'Expect' to look like that 'ripped, flat chested 20 something magazine model with those dime-sized areolas' post-op. Gynecomastic Reduciton Surgery is only a 'fix', not a 'Cure'. Those comtemplating surgery should aim for 'an improvement'... not 'perfection'. While obtaining 'perfection' is not beyond the realm of posibility, I would have to take an educated guess that the 'pre-envisioned perfection' does not happen very often...

Having been a member of this site for 8 years and with a personal post count of over 5000, I would have to say that I've 'read' 10x that many posts from other members... So yeah, I'm fully aware that 'some' surgeries do not provide 'expected' results... Actually, in many cases, the newbie post-opper 'panics' because he sees swelling and 'thinks' that he still has Gyencomastia. From my experience of reading many, many posts by post-op sufferers, they have the notion that they will be 'Cured' and 'Good-To-Go' in a weeks time after surgery... In many cases, recovering from Gyne surgery involves alot of patience... It can take anywhere from 6 months to a year for some of us to obtain 'final' surgical results. We all heal at different rates.

Well my man, I'll let you get back to your former 'PLAYBOY Centerfold'...   ;)


GB...

 
« Last Edit: October 04, 2012, 09:50:57 AM by Grandpa Bambu »

Offline AnonNZ

  • Posting Member
  • *
  • Posts: 36
I have bigger and firmer breasts than one of the ladies I am currently seeing and she is a former Playboy Centerfold).

I just logged in to give you a virtual high-five. Dating someone like that while having large breasts isn't easy, despite what you may think. You must be one handsome man, or are quite the charmer.

Offline Alchemist

  • Gold Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 492
I have bigger and firmer breasts than one of the ladies I am currently seeing and she is a former Playboy Centerfold).

I just logged in to give you a virtual high-five. Dating someone like that while having large breasts isn't easy, despite what you may think. You must be one handsome man, or are quite the charmer.

Hi AnonZ,

I rather think you are mistaken about many things.  I have had D or DD reasonably firm breasts since Jr High.  I am of average looks and of any of many builds over the years as my metabolic problems took me all over the place weight and muscle wise.  I have never been accused of being a "charmer" or of being "handsome".  Most often I am approached by the woman both when dating and now for teaching. I turned down many more offers from ladies than I have accepted. Every offer was with a lady that had instantly gotten my attention as well. I teach a variation of tantric alchemy. I don't have a lot of adult getting to know and date ladies experience however, as I was married for 33+ years and ill for 20 years of that, and have been in a relationship for all but the first year or so after divorce.

And I have no problem at all in any way with the breasts I have.  They in no way hinder my life style in any way.  As far as finding a winner of a woman, how many does a man need to find?   There are not that many polygamists around.


Offline TigerPaws

  • Senior Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 587
Honestly I am what you would call average for my age, I am physically fit but I do show the miles of a career in the military, and I have the battle scars which go along with those years. I will admit that I am fairly well off, enough so that I could retire in comfort if I so desired. But what would I do?

Generally the social circles I associate with are a bit more of the business, fashion and high brow crowd which I believe makes a big difference in the ladies I meet. Generally speaking I have no trouble attracting intelligent, affluent and beautiful women. Occasionally one will be put off or visibly uncomfortable with my breasts, if that is the case I simply do not associate with them any longer.

Having developed full firm fully formed breasts has had no perceivable impact on either the quantity or quality of the ladies I choose to be with.

As with many things in life, if you present a air of confidence people will accept you for what and who you are. If you are intelligent, kind, have a sense of humor, attentive to a woman's needs and generous with your time and resources (not a cheapskate) then attracting women is not an issue.
     

Offline Alchemist

  • Gold Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 492

Hi Tigerpaws,

As with many things in life, if you present a air of confidence people will accept you for what and who you are. If you are intelligent, kind, have a sense of humor, attentive to a woman's needs and generous with your time and resources (not a cheapskate) then attracting women is not an issue.     


I would bet that you also genuinely LIKE ladies, that you respect them and of course treat them well.  The ladies can tell if one is just after them for sex or if a man genuinely likes to be with them.  I follow Heinlein's advice on ladies.  Really and genuinely pay focused attention to them.  Really be there with them.  If one is afraid of what she may think or say, there is no way to really pay attention.  Really it probably comes down to the golden rule.

One of the best ways I ever found to get to know easily college aged and young adult ladies was to invite them to model for me photographically.  That follows your rule of generous with time and resources (she would have access to all cameras, lenses, accessories), lunch and dinner.  It was an all day date. I had a darkroom and made some excellent b&w prints.  I also played it fair. I was willing to model nude for them and they would model nude for me. Going first often broke the ice and let them get over their fears of seeing and showing the body. They could photograph me too and I would aid them in the darkroom.  I was willing to be equally vulnerable with them.  Those with fear try to always position themselves protectively and that is a real put-off to a lot of ladies.  They wonder what you are hiding and why.  I don't lie to or mislead the ladies in any way. I don't use the body language of fear trying to hide my breasts.  I have as good posture as I am able to because of some hard mileage along the way.  Confidence is a key.  I was never afraid of scaring some off by my opinions, body, practices or whatever; better up front before a lot of time and effort.  The ones with whom I connected incredibly well were very rare.  I've run into perhaps 12 in my lifetime, married to one for 33 years and been with another most of the time since.

Good luck to all in their pursuits of the ladies (or guys for that matter, same fears apply) and in dealing with gyne.  For me at least a good relationship really adds to my joy of life.






Offline Grandpa Bambu

  • Senior Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 5444
  • 31 Year Gynecomastia Victim...
I have bigger and firmer breasts than one of the ladies I am currently seeing and she is a former Playboy Centerfold).

I just logged in to give you a virtual high-five. Dating someone like that while having large breasts isn't easy, despite what you may think. You must be one handsome man, or are quite the charmer.

Or... have alot of coin...  ;)

Offline TigerPaws

  • Senior Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 587
I have bigger and firmer breasts than one of the ladies I am currently seeing and she is a former Playboy Centerfold).

I just logged in to give you a virtual high-five. Dating someone like that while having large breasts isn't easy, despite what you may think. You must be one handsome man, or are quite the charmer.

Or... have alot of coin...  ;)

I know and have known many men with a great deal of money, what good did it do them when they were dead? If my last dollar was spent giving a rose to a beautiful lady who was by my side when I die, then I can meet what may lay beyond death knowing that no one will be fighting over what I may have had in life.

Life is far to precious and short to wast it by being a miser, a dead billionaire is just as dead as a broke bum.

I saw a news piece about Donald Trump's new 757 jet which seats 30. It has gold plated this and gold plated that, a bed, shower, large entertainment, system full galley and much more. When the reporter asked Trump's personal pilot if Mr. Trump ever used the entertainment system, the pilot said no, he works.

Now I do not begrudge Trump a penny of his 6 plus billion dollar net worth; what I question is his and others need to die with the biggest bank account. What good is a big bank account/high net worth when you are dead?

Maybe it is just that I have caused, seen and come very close to death myself. I now value what time I have left and spend each day enjoying life. There is little in this word that compares with waking up and watching the sunrise, spending the day with an intelligent, beautiful woman who is fun to be with. To enjoy a Lobster dinner while overlooking the ocean as the sunsets.

Life should be enjoyed not struggled with by such concerning yourself with such trivial matters such as Gynecomastia.
 

Offline jazzer

  • Posting Member
  • *
  • Posts: 29
Life should be enjoyed not struggled with by such concerning yourself with such trivial matters such as Gynecomastia. 

Gynecomastia ruined the younger part of my life. When I had surgery to eliminate the issue it changed my life completely. And I'm sure many people with this condition will agree that gynecomastia is not a trivial matter.

Offline xelnaga13

  • Senior Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 518
I wish I had a silver bullet to put this thread to sleep for good. There is not sense in debating a topic that is subjective to personal experience and feelings. That is to say that if you believe gyne is a trivial matter, you are just as correct as the member that thinks its a serious matter. 

hammer

  • Guest
Very well put! Maybe we/ or no one should add to this particular post anymore, as you said everyone handles it the way they do and I can't make you handle it the way I did nor you make me handle it the you did, as we are all individuals!

That all being said, we all need to be here for each other as we all have one thing in common, and we should support each other, and if we do not have good intention in mind, then we need to move on!

I for one have decided to change how I look at this, as we are all individuals! Who else is with me? I am here to support!



Bob
« Last Edit: October 07, 2012, 09:51:34 AM by hammer »


 

SMFPacks CMS 1.0.3 © 2024