Author Topic: Needing Encouragement  (Read 12747 times)

Offline calledasissy

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I have read a few post this forum for the past few weeks,after trying to find a solution to my back and neck pain.I have had manboobs from the age of 14 and now am 45 but like some on this site I don't want surgery I want to be able to live with them.I bought two bras both 38b one fits perfect and I wear it in the morning while walking the dog but take it off before the rest of the family get up i just don't know how to tell my wife about this...

hammer

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I have read a few post this forum for the past few weeks,after trying to find a solution to my back and neck pain.I have had manboobs from the age of 14 and now am 45 but like some on this site I don't want surgery I want to be able to live with them.I bought two bras both 38b one fits perfect and I wear it in the morning while walking the dog but take it off before the rest of the family get up i just don't know how to tell my wife about this...


Truth is always the best policy! There are very few men here that have wives that don't fully support and understand their need to support breast! After all they themselves have to support theirs!

My wife went with me for my formal fitting and said I was treated with more respect then my daughter was when she took her. I found out that I was wearing a much to tight bra after that as I was in size denial. I thought that I was a DD and it turned out that I was an "H"!

70% of males have gynecomastia, so it is as very normal. If you are one that grows large enough to need support there is nothing wrong with the use of support.

We often say here on the forum that bras are a article of clothing made to support breast. What difference does it make if those breast are on a man or a woman?

Welcome to the forum! We are here to for one another!


Bob

aboywithgirls

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For me, wearing a bra makes more sense than having surgery. I don't mind wearing a bra.  I don't usually go bra less.  I know that I am not a woman.  Every one else knows that I am not a woman. But women figured out years ago that life with breasts is easier with a bra. Just because I want to make my life easier and wear a bra, I won't magically become a woman if I wear one. I will only be a more comfortable man.

hammer

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Yes, you said what needed to be said! The bra provides comfort!

That is exactly what one can say if ever ask why you wear one? All one must say is, "I'm a man the has been "blessed" (say this as a joke) with over sized breast! I wear it for the same reason that any one else with breast does, comfort!

If that doesn't work, then you may need to get down and dirty!

aboywithgirls

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Hammer, over the years, I have been asked that question more than once (alot more than once) "Are you wearing a bra?" followed by "why do you wear a bra? " My replies (to the people who don't deserve a dignified response) is "yes I am" and "are you wearing shoes?, that's because you have feet, right? ". That usually ends the Q & A about my bra.

hammer

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Hammer, over the years, I have been asked that question more than once (alot more than once) "Are you wearing a bra?" followed by "why do you wear a bra? " My replies (to the people who don't deserve a dignified response) is "yes I am" and "are you wearing shoes?, that's because you have feet, right? ". That usually ends the Q & A about my bra.

That works! "Are you wearing shoes"? Never thought of that!

Offline LittleBob

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It has been a couple weeks since I posted on the forum and I must say that my feelings regarding my breasts have not changed. I'm still experiencing tenderness and a slight burning sensation. I have concluded that tissue growth is most likely the cause. The fear of them growing out of proportion has not subsided. Though I think the overall feeling of loneliness, depression, and lacking approval constitutes more to that fear than the unlikely scenario of being turned into an outsider of society. There are many other factors that have already satisfied that claim.

...I actually don't know what else to say. I've been sitting here for a good 10 minutes pondering why I'm even making the attempt to write out something as if the answers to my problems will suddenly appear. I can say that I'm financially secure to the point of not requiring a job. I just put a new video card in my computer. I spent a week visiting my older brother. I've made arrangements with my cousin to visit the Philippines next year. Yet I'm still worried about these odd physical changes enough to come to the forum.

Maybe I should give it another couple weeks and see what happens. Then perhaps I'll know what to ask.

Offline dbweb

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Aboywithgirls said it as well as anything I have seen in the past! 

If the shoe fits wear it as they say.  Simply using clothing designed to provide comfort and add required support, does not change who you are.

I have been wearing support stockings for more than 30 years now (pantyhose) and still have my little friends and their buddy, so I didn't change cause I started to take of my poor veins.

More recently because of changing hormone levels, I became aware of another need for support, and have accepted it as such.

The point in all this, not every person is the same, some have some body issues that require special  clothing to  manage a good well being.  Accept that for what it is, and live your life. 

I see others that have been given serious medical conditions, some times fatal, and I feel lucky I can continue on with simply some changes in how I underdress.

D B


Offline TigerPaws

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It has been a couple weeks since I posted on the forum and I must say that my feelings regarding my breasts have not changed. I'm still experiencing tenderness and a slight burning sensation. I have concluded that tissue growth is most likely the cause. The fear of them growing out of proportion has not subsided. Though I think the overall feeling of loneliness, depression, and lacking approval constitutes more to that fear than the unlikely scenario of being turned into an outsider of society. There are many other factors that have already satisfied that claim.

...I actually don't know what else to say. I've been sitting here for a good 10 minutes pondering why I'm even making the attempt to write out something as if the answers to my problems will suddenly appear. I can say that I'm financially secure to the point of not requiring a job. I just put a new video card in my computer. I spent a week visiting my older brother. I've made arrangements with my cousin to visit the Philippines next year. Yet I'm still worried about these odd physical changes enough to come to the forum.

Maybe I should give it another couple weeks and see what happens. Then perhaps I'll know what to ask.
LittleBob,

Breast growth is not linear, it occurs in spurts, I can go for months of nothing then suddenly pain and itching. My nipples are so tender the shower water hurts.

You need to remember that your breast is a 3 dimensional object, growth can occur inward and structurally as well as outward and increasing in fullness. As your breasts develop, so will your glands, especially your lymphatic system which is far more developed in women. New nerves will grow as will fat deposits.

Growth can continue for many years but it my take time to see any changes. We can feel far more than can be seen. One of my Ladies who is a physician recently gave me a complete breast exam, and while she pronounced me healthy she had difficulty feeling the breast gland until I assisted her.

I understand that it is difficult to speak to others regarding your feelings as your breasts grow, it feels so very different from anything else you have ever experienced that you have little point of reference. I believe that most of us here have had many of the same feelings, like when your arm cuts across your chest and your breast is in the way. You notice these things because they are strange and new but given time most learn to deal with it and move on to more important issues in life.
   

aboywithgirls

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There are quite a few women out there who have 38G breasts like mine or larger and they haven't died from having them.  They probably haven't considered having breast reduction surgery. All they want is a good bra that fits.....Me too!

hammer

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At 46H I've never thought of surgery either and the only doctor that has ever even said anything about it to me is the same doctor that told me that I needed to get a formal fitting! My VA primary told me that the VA doesn't do that sort of surgery, but being that my breast are as big as they are she thought she could make a good argument that the VA should remove them!

I said no thanks! I just couldn't  imagine how I would look after them doing the surgery for one thing being they don't do it! For the other, I don't think it needs to be done.

Offline expedient-traveller

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TigerPaws: I just read your comment and what caught my eye was, "...cutting across your chest and your breasts get in the way." That is something simple but one of the everyday things we deal with. It is so simple and is never thought of until you do it. Another is holding something in your hand while driving and cupping a breast with the "crook" of the arm. As a guy these things are so foreign and new as the "girls" get a bit larger. The point is...it is all normal! There is nothing weird or odd about it. Like an earlier reply stated, we all wear shoes, we get hair cuts, we cloth ourselves and it is all the same. It is a part of life.

hammer

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 Constant change is also a part of life, some change is good, some not so good, but it is our best interest that we learn to adapt! Of course, much easier said, then done!


Blessing to all!

Bob

Offline bill44b

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As said before a bra is just a garment for support. I have been wearing bra for over 30 years with only a few comments or questions. A couple female Co-workers  asked if I was wearing a bra i answered yes I needed it for support. They agreed and nothing else was said (I think that I was larger than one of them). It took me time trying to hide the fact I was wearing a bra, but now I don't care if my bra shows or not. "ITS JUST A GARMENT FOR SUPPORT FOR BOTH WOMAN AND MEN".

Offline Bman41

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Amazon has a very good return policy, I haven't bought a bra from them that I returned, but they might.  Underwear, no, Bras might.  
And no one will ever know or care.  
HanesOutlet stores are rumored to be very good at letting men try on bras, but I haven't tried.  Soma is too, and I have with ZERO issues (even with a woman on the dressing room next to me) and Lane Bryant Cacique is rumored to be very good with men too.  Cacique is not commissioned sales, I think Soma is.  Either way, they have good policy on allowing men to try on without issues.  With Soma I just went in a a rainy or snowy day about 30-60 min from closing,  No one in there.  And I called ahead to find out if they had what I was looking for and asked if it was ok to try on, so they were totally fine with it.


 

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