somethin i want to share...

[desi]

hi all,

I was abt 14, when my friends in school started pinching my chest (i was overweight also) and started makin fun of me. I decided, I have to lose weight! I was not aware of such a problem called gynecomastia. I started running like crazy, went on a diet.

I lost a lot of lbs, and started gaining some confidence. I still had small breasts/puffyNipples.
Then there was a time, I went into complete depression. I hardly had friends, and kept away from women completely. Women would never even talk to me. I didnt care.. just gave up on women. Most of my friends enjoyed their lives, and I lived in depression.

I kept thinkin, this will go away someday. When I was 21, I had a girlfriend. Becoz of my workout regime, I had and still have a great chest under the gyno. I avoided wearing T-shirts and kept myself away from the pool and waterparks. I finished school when I was 24 I got married, to my girlfriend.

2 yrs back, I started searching about chest fat and came across this site. I realized I have this problem. I went for a surgery, lipo only.. as expected, I dont have the results I looked fwd to.

Today its the 31st, and the new year will set in. I am sitting here and as I type, I just want to share that the same girl friend I had, who is my wife now, wants to leave me forever. She says we dont get along well. She is going to her parents, I dont know what to do. I am lookin for a surgeon, she knows I am going thru a hard time, keeping up the expenses of the home, also doing my job, and doing this all by myself.

I really dont care about what happens next. Life is not perfect. I thought that I would bring her a gift today or at least take her out for dinner and spend some good time. I am 30 yrs old now. She doesnt like my parents, my friends, anyone related to me. I am getting this surgery done only for myself. I have completely given up on my married life. All I want to do is just keep living and doing what I am doing. Hopefully, someday, someone will understand.

Thank you all, for understanding. I dont know what I would do if it was not for these boards.

[desi]

i totally hear you dude.. wheres home for you?

[headheldhigh01]

that sucks in a big way. 

not getting along well is kind of vague.  how much is gyne a factor - is op $ part of the issue at all?  can you talk her into any kind of counseling?  sometimes women just bottle up and expect you to mind-read, and a third party can let them get past it.  maybe you've tried, but thought i'd mention it. 

feeling for you   

[desi]

yea headheldhigh, its kinda difficult. I have tried all these yrs. Now i am not tryi anymore, so everything is cold. So long as I tried, things kept going up/down , now I give up, and things dont move anymore. $ definitely is an issue, but well, I have saved for surgery since last 1.5 yrs.

[flex1appeal]

I am so sorry to hear about this bro. Please do me a favor and don't give up. That's the easy road. And I know I am not in your situation and you probably think what would I know about being in your shoes. And you are right, I know nothing about being in your shoes other than what you've shared. However, I have gone thru some pretty crappy things myself these past few months. Hell, the entire last year was the worst year of my life. I had to pay my now ex $8k to get her off the title to my house. 8k i didn't have to part with. $8k I shouldn't have had to part with cause I bought the house and loan was in my name and she was only added on the title after we got engaged. She conned me into it like she conned me the entire relationship. I found out just how horrible people can be in a relationship to the one they claim to love. Now my story (which I've barely shared) is nothing similar to yours. But I can tell you how badly I've felt like quiting over the years and saying f--k it. I've had a pretty bad decade so far to be honest with you. Don't get me wrong, hasn't been all bad. But more bad than good. But I fight for each day. Surrendering to your situation (s) in life is equivalent to killing yourself IMO. You want something it won't come to you. I've learned that the hard way. And I have been very successful in getting what I want because I haven't given up. Somethings I have gotten and lost and somethings I still haven't gotten. But I know that a lot of the things I have gotten were out of pure determination and they were things I at one point saiid I'd never be able to get. But I got them. Trick I've now got to learn is how to hold onto those things I worked so hard to gain. Anyhow, go see that movie The Pursuit of Happiness for some real inspiration. It really makes you realize how some of us really don't have it as bad as others. It's a very powerful movie. And it makes me glad that I fight for my life situations like he did. You are in control of your own destiny. I truely believe that. Sorry for the pep talk! LOL I just hate hearing the words I give up. Things will get better believe it or not if you continue to put forth effort. But they won't improve if you give up.

[desi]

hey flex,

thx for the good words dude. i think i really needed that.

thx again dude..

[flex1appeal]

Thanks for the compliment. Honestly, if you could see what I looked like a few years back you'd kick me yourself for me letting myself get gyno. I'll see if I can find a picture of me in competition shape and post it. I had a perfect chest. I will get it again.