Inner Self - Inner Feelings

[Orb]

  Responding to other post today got me thinking.  I stated It's a balancing act pleasing self and not pushing things, our outward appearance, none male chest, onto and down others throats. 

  42C has said a lot of things about the need to wear support and the times chosen not to.  I'm in that camp.  I agree as I stated in Taxmappers thread the bra makes him look, more finished.  It softens the chest so to speak.  I'm sure I, and most others, would say the same.  I'm to the point where wearing makes me just feel better.  Emotionally and physically.   I feel looking better as well.  However there are times I don't wear.  Not to make me feel better but to avoid the controversy and to be, " taken more seriously," in the situation.  Those times I just try to tone down and just plainly don't want to be noticed and judged.  Again because of where others are.  When I'm wearing I feel complete, happy.  Is it in my head? I feel it's me.  It's hard to express.  When I'm bra free I don't feel myself.  Untrue to my inner self? A fraud?  I keep telling myself not but the loop keeps running in my head.  The times of not wearing something is and has to be fewer and fewer in between now.   Not wearing a traditional bra yet wearing a sport coat is doable. More of a thin pullover then which I don't find all that comfortable.  However I do feel true to self when I'm "fully dressed."

  Am I alone in my feelings?  Do others have that same mental calmness when your "fully" dressed?

[Johndoe1]

I feel "more complete" when I am wearing a bra. It has nothing to do with needing to "scratch an itch" but the realization that I have two fairly prominent flesh and glandular mounds projecting off my upper chest which cannot self support very well and needs external scaffolding and holders to keep their weight and movement from ripping themselves off my body. That prominence I cannot hide, braless or not. So I wear what works for me, which is a bra, a garment traditionally styled for and associated with women, which I am not. It's society who has the hangup that I have naturally two fairly prominent flesh and glandular mounds projecting off my upper chest and a traditionally women's garment is what one would wear to support and contain such prominences.

I have learned over time that I prefer to be comfortable being supported and contained over what people think or say.  They don't have to live with my boobs. I do. If I present male, people generally accept me as a male, even if my chest looks feminine and never acknowledges my girls. 

Your mileage may vary. 

[Busted (and happy)]

Very happy fully bra'd up. Definitely not comfortably dressed without. 
I have made it clear before that 95% of my clothing comes from "across the aisle"
I present and  am accepted as male and I wouldn't want it any other way. The only out ward obvious choice that notices is skirt instead of shorts in summer which most of the time goes under the radar and is excused  as an alternative to a kilt. 

[Evolver]

...mental calmness...

Mental calmness...love it.

My mental calmness has shot up a million % this year simply due to self acceptance, whether I am wearing a bra or not.

[42CSurprise!]

There definitely is something calming about feeling brassiere cups holding my breasts... the band around my rib cage, the straps over my shoulder.  Not all of my brassieres require a slender strap holding the shoulder straps in place, but even when wearing that device it all feels perfect.

This morning on a whim I tried on the four different white brassieres I own, each a different style though three are from the same lingerie company.  It is fascinating how each brassiere holds and displays my breasts.  The minimizer does just that... a 42c.  The 44c is also a minimizer, but the larger cups gives a bit more room for my breasts.  The 46b has a more rigid frame but the cups are amazingly soft and they project my breasts more than the other two.  At the moment I'm wearing another 42c which is also called a minimizer, perhaps because it is not padded.  None of these four brassieres is padded.  The fourth is from the same company as the first two, but the cups are larger, allowing my breasts the room they need.  They fill the front of my turtleneck in the most delicious way.

I know many of you are wearing a brassiere every day.  I also know many of you have quite dramatic breasts.  It is hard for me to imagine presenting myself with these sumptuous boobs projecting from my chest.  I may love them but I don't know if the world in which I live is quite ready for them.  For the moment both my breasts and my wonderful collection of brassieres will remain my secret pleasure.  I'll tell you guys though... but maybe not everything...

[Johndoe1]

I may love them but I don't know if the world in which I live is quite ready for them.  For the moment both my breasts and my wonderful collection of brassieres will remain my secret pleasure.  I'll tell you guys though... but maybe not everything...

That's why they are called "unmentionables"! 

[Dudewithboobs]

Lol John. Never thought of it like that but makes sense and funny. 

The mental calmness is definitely there. Never thought at 30 when I began developing and the insecurity and such that came with it that at 36 I’d be going to bed picking out what bra to wear the next day or trying bras on in a store before buying a new brand or style of. Or putting one on in the morning and scooping swooping and feeling great about what I seen looking down as they’ve gotten fuller. Or kind of bopping around laughing a little at their jiggle. But just have found enjoyment and entertainment in them now days rather than embarrassment. But I think over time insecurity just turns in to appreciation when you have a community of folks like this who open the discussion and topics to normalize what society may not. 

As mentioned by 42c may not be shared with everyone but days that I wear a bra I absolutely feel better about how i look feel and feel pretty calm when walking around a store at work or where ever in my bra. I’m a 34b in some and 34c in others and in a bra or not I don’t get stares or views

[42CSurprise!]

That's funny John... unmentionables.  Undergarments, especially brassieres, panties, bustiers are unmentionable despite the fact breasts get so much attention in our society... boobs, breasts, T&A...

I wrote this morning in the General Talk forum about the itching I'm experiencing at my nipples and breasts.  My breasts are definitely growing.  Bizarre to realize this fact does not disturb me, even though I'm aware it will become more and more difficult to conceal them.  Winter is approaching and multiple layers will help but who knows... by next year I may feel the need to wear a brassiere all the time like the pros among us.  As I've said, however, wearing a brassiere though quite natural on one hand, even comforting... also has an erotic edge for me. 

It seems a shame to have such lovely breasts and not have anyone with whom to share them... though with much diminished libido, I have no idea what that would look like.  In the meantime I'll follow developments with great interest.  Using the old measurement guide, I think I'm past the grapefruit stage and approaching melons... definitely pliant but firm cantaloupes filling my Lilyette brassiere at the moment.  I'd have been thrilled as a teenage boy to have encountered a bosom like this on the front seat of my Chevy coupe.  

[blad]

I have been living with bras for most of my life, having developed breasts around age 13. Constant comments about my breasts from school classmates created the curiosity to try a bra in my early teens. From that first time trying on a bra I was instantly surprised how well I filled out the cups and realized that all those school comments, although not given to be helpful, were right that maybe I did need a bra.

At that young age, not only was there a realization that I fit a bra but that there was a fascination in wearing one. It was a unique feeling as a teen boy to be looking at myself filling out the bra cups with cleavage, and seeing my profile in the mirror with the bra on. The feeling of wearing a bra was  very positive. I also began to realize that I physically felt more comfortable and put together while wearing one.

Almost overnight I had a big improvement in my self acceptance when wearing a bra. My only hold back was figuring out how this all fit in with social expectations. It was a bit of a conundrum to be a teen who has just realized that they are ok with having boobs and wearing a bra but unsure how to move forward as the real me.

Having had breasts for so long now, as opposed to others developing later in life, it is not something I am overly self conscious about or think about in a social setting. I am comfortable both physically and emotionally wearing a bra daily, and would feel there is something missing if I did not have the support of a bra.

Many here are still trying to figure things out with their more recently acquired features, while early teen developers like me have had much longer to establish what is normal for us. Further, after all the tumultuous comments about my breasts and needing a bra during the school years, my life with breasts after those school years has been very quiet with almost no comments made. By avoiding T shirts entirely, staying with pattern button down shirts, I am not aware of anyone noticing my bra, and feel very safe to wear one daily. If I were to worry about my bra being noticed, it would only be due to close contact such as a hug, and if those situations are anticipated I will usually select a racer type bra which I would guess is less detectable.

As an aside, many on this site have posted pictures of themselves in T shirts over the course of time. I would think that a T shirt would be far more risky in exposing your bra outlines, if that is a concern. If it is not a concern then good for you.

In conclusion, I would say that those who developed breasts early in life during puberty have had a different journey and a much longer time frame to adjust to their reality. Further, if you have breasts you will have bumps up front whether you wear a bra or not. So if a bra makes you more comfortable just do it. If you are concerned about displaying a bra, clothing choices definitely make a difference. 

And on a positive note, you may enjoy having those breasts and wearing a bra, which makes acceptance all the more easy.

[Orb]

I have been living with bras for most of my life, having developed breasts around age 13. Constant comments about my breasts from school classmates created the curiosity to try a bra in my early teens. From that first time trying on a bra I was instantly surprised how well I filled out the cups and realized that all those school comments, although not given to be helpful, were right that maybe I did need a bra...



In conclusion, I would say that those who developed breasts early in life during puberty have had a different journey and a much longer time frame to adjust to their reality. Further, if you have breasts you will have bumps up front whether you wear a bra or not. So if a bra makes you more comfortable just do it. If you are concerned about displaying a bra, clothing choices definitely make a difference.

And on a positive note, you may enjoy having those breasts and wearing a bra, which makes acceptance all the more easy.

  I appreciate honesty and openness everyone shares.  

I feel developing in ones early years certainly adds a different level of acceptance in your life. ( Not to diminish the hard times endured.)  Yet, all life's influences, pressures and experiences has and does shape ones view on the matter no matter what stage of life we are.  

I have from the onset accepted everything nature and life throws at me.  I have found that level of acceptance, joy and wonder to be rather...interesting & fun.   I guess that's the part I'm trying to come to terms with.  My level of yeah this is me and I'm having fun with and quite like it, is me now. 

I feel I'm in the camp also that I now enjoy a nice well fitting bra and like how it makes me look and feel.  Contained and at ease.  It's the at ease part I'm now realizing is okay.  

  As 42C noted, allowing everyone else into our world isn't all ways best in the moment.  The right time will show itself also.

I hope the whole of society can get to where we are sooner rather than later.

[Dudewithboobs]

I often wonder if it is better to have development to a point of obvious growth early on or later on. Early on gives the idea of being accustomed to them so whatever. But also gives an enduring insecurity that even as one gets over it later on they may not overcome the overwhelming history of people mocking staring rejecting etc. 
And while later on is great to me as I didn’t develop until 30 it gives the life has begun with job or career family kids etc. so why would a healthy male who isn’t on meds or condition be growing breasts. My insecurity is always gaining suspicions rather than sympathy if they get any bigger. 
And agreed wearing a bra isn’t an every day every moment thing for some of all as while we’ve adjusted don’t mean others will and it is fair to be mindful of that and isn’t a judgment to any who views it as odd or whatever. I know this forum gives me as much comfort as my bras do. But I still need to be mindful of when and where I can put my breasts in their pockets lol. Between this forum and the messages shared with some directly I have really found a solid peace with being a healthy guy in his 30s who just happens to have boobs. Very thankful for this place