Gynecomastia Charity/Funds?

[Futile]

I had a thought...

I understand a lot of you enjoy your Gynecomastia and have come to accept it and live with it, however,
many people who do not like it cannot afford surgery, many of these people myself included cannot get a job because of the years of emotional and mental stress being beat up or teased for having Gyne. I was thinking, why not use Gynecomastia.org as a sort of socialized pool for helping members fund their surgery one at a time.

Now I'm not too certain all the details, legalities or how realistic this is but just wanted to get feedback on this idea. I have been sitting here at home for 10 years unable to do anything, literally mentally handicap from a physical "deformity" that other people just couldn't accept so they had to tease me to an extent of destroying my life.

It might work something like a donation pool with a random drawing of a person's name who desires the surgery, along with of course some way of verifying they have it and use that pool specifically for surgery, assistance on them obtaining the surgery (like publisher's clearing house drives up to your door, why not Gynecomastia.org showing up saying.. congrats! you won the pool and get surgery!)

I don't know, maybe I am dreaming here.. but in this way we could all chip in $5, $10 ..$100 or whatever we can to help one of us at a time. Maybe even sell compression garments or other items and put a percentage of the money from that towards the pool

I cannot get a job, I have no doctors or insurance. My life as it is now is futile and if nothing changes I will die on the streets  (i won't die on the streets, that is all I will say about that without saying too much)

[Atomic6]

Why can't you get a job man?

[SoX]

In an ideal world but people would begin to become disheartened when they dont get picked and they're chippin in everyweek also its not a disease many people consider to be a problem even though we know how wrong they are and they would probably rather put money into a more worthwhile charity

[Grandpa Bambu]

SoX...  Gynecomastia is not a disease! It is 'condition'... 

Futile...  Dude, get a compression shirt. Cover-up as best as possible, get out there, find a job and save your hard earned coin. It's not impossible my man...

GB

[Pacifico]

I agree with Bambu.  Get out there and get a job.  If you knew having a job would get rid of gyne, would you do it?  It will.  Go sit in a parking garage and collect money.  You sit on your ass all day in a box and in due time you will have your money.  It's like what you do all day at home but somebody gives you money, consider that charity.

Call Obama and see if he will add you in the stimulus package.

Otherwise I consider this post insulting.  This request is not much different from asking a homeless person to donate to homeless people.  How do you think a homeless guy would respond to that?

I mean that in a kind way.  Best of luck.

[Paa_Paw]

The original premises of this thread are based upon several presumptions which are false.

First,  I do not enjoy the fact that I have Gynecomastia, Nor do I personally know anyone who does. Some of us are not good surgical candidates for some reason. I am in that latter group. My health problems essentially rule out most elective surgery. Because of my medical costs, I could not contribute to such a fund in any case.

Next, If you are being beaten up as a result of your Gynecomastia, You are most likely beating yourself up. It is true that we suffer a lot of teasing etc. while in our teens but this is pretty well behind us when we become adults.

If you have been sitting at home for 10 years and are self imprisoned as a result of your Gynecomastia, It is not a physical problem that keeps you confined nor is it likely that you have a true mental condition. The problem is most likely Psychological and completely treatable. The only thing preventing you from getting treatment is your own inertia. Psychological services can be found that are funded entirely or in part by churches and community service groups. All you need to do is ask.

Finally, I take exception to your allegation that Gynecomastia is a deformity. The reason many Insurance companies do not cover the cost of surgery is that the condition is so common that they consider it to be statistically normal. It is an embarrassment, but nothing more than that.

Be a man and take charge of your own life.

[Grandpa Bambu]

Well said Dan!

GB

[Jake]

Futile, half of the burden is staying silent.  The other half is what you see in the mirror.

With your mindset, you're setting yourself up for failure before you open your eyes.

[Paa_Paw]

A professional psychological counselor would maintain confidentiality.

[Grandpa Bambu]

A professional psychological counselor would maintain confidentiality.

That sounds $$Expensive$$ Dan!

GB

[Paa_Paw]

It could be but does not have to be.

As I said previously, there are many community service groups, schools, and churches who underwrite counseling services. One of my former employers offered an employee assistance program that included confidential counseling separate from that which would have been included in the medical benefits. If one truly wants help, it is available.

We have heard from many young men in their teens who have started to work and save for surgery because their families either wouldn't or couldn't help.

We all know about the emotional and psychological impact that Gynecomastia can have on us. It is what brought most of us to this site. There comes a time though when each of us has reached a realization that we have only two options: Accept our condition or have surgery to get rid of it.

Gynecomastia is not a condition for sissies, you have to be a man to deal with something like this.

[Futile]

Thank you all for giving me a "get off your butt and work" attitude, I wish it were that easy. I understand all the logical reasons why Gynecomastia should not disable me, I understand logically that yeah, it is just flesh, it is just a body it is not who I am. But my logic can not over-power my emotion and psychological scars, it does not matter how many people talk to me about it, it does not matter how much I think about positive things in the end my emotions entwined with my past experiences wins and I find myself thinking about my gyne constantly, and how others do not accept it, cannot accept it and judge me based off it.

I did not mean to make this thread sound insulting to you as one stated, it was not my intent at all to insult anyone here. I guess I am a failure to life, I might just give up soon and take my own life to prevent being a burden to society, to gynecomastia.org and to my family. I thought this was a support group, not a group to ask for help and be dragged through mud.

People cannot understand my circumstances or my disabilities without having either empathy, understanding and listening or unless they lived my life and went through what I have been through. We all have our disabilities, and we all have our abilities. When we have a disability we need help others to help us with their abilities. That is all.

I give up, thanks for the responses anyways.

My own mom shuns me about it, my dad mocks me and makes fun of me, but when you come to a support group for gynecomastia and get plowed you know your life really is meaningless beyond anyone's care

I know it's a mental condition, but mental conditions can and do have physical triggers. Without that trigger, there is no mental condition. Without Gynecomastia, I would be free.

[Jake]

You're the only one keeping yourself from getting professional help as Dan suggested.  No one here is dragging you through the mud or any such thing.  You've got to make things happen and take action yourself or nothing will progress.

This IS a support group and from what I've seen, we're trying to help you.  Everyone has been kind and no one has been out of line.
I strongly believe you're making every reason to not do anything and maintain an "Oh me" attitude.

Accept our suggestions and do something or don't do anything.  No one is calling you a failure or doubting your Gyne.

Don't expect us to coddle you and say it'll be alright.  That's not support.

Gynecomastia is not a disability.  You could have something else wrong with you if you're so overwhelmed by this.  That's why Dan suggested professional counseling so strongly! 

Dan is right about one other thing: Gyne is not a condition for sissies. 

Be a man, Futile.  Be more of a man than your Father is being to you and own up to the situation.  Do this for yourself and no one else.  If you think I'm dragging you through the mud, then don't come back to these boards.

Good luck.

P.S. - Don't ever tell anyone here that we don't know your pain because we haven't lived your life.  We all have suffered the same way and tasted the pain you're talking about.  We all know how bad you feel.  You know the difference though?  We all did something or are doing something about it.

[Pacifico]

Jake, well said!  We are all pulling for you! The first steps are the hardest!

[dondante]

There are 10,000+ registered users on this site, a fraction of which are actually active. Even if each registered user contributed a dollar, it would pay for no more than 2 surgeries.

The biggest problem with this condition is the shame that we, and society, attach to it. People like Grandpa Bambu & Merle, who are willing to be public spokespeople for this condition are very rare. I'm sure many people on these boards have seen that "me versus my boob" video, where the documentarian goes around interviewing people on the street, and the reactions of the people when asked about "manboobs". It's a joke. Hence the shame.

Futile, I can't say I know what you're going through. My gyne tormented me, but it didn't prevent me from having an otherwise normal life. Maybe your condition is so dramatic that there's no way for you to even conceal it. If that's the case, I truly, truly, feel for you. It saddens me that your family, which is supposed to be your true "support" network, is making your situation worse by ridiculing you. That's awful. People like that shouldn't be allowed to have children - they ought to be in jail.

I have one thing to tell you, though, and I want you to believe this. Take your pain and turn it into motivation. Believe me, once you know you are working towards a goal of saving enough money to get surgery done - the looks, the snears, all the BULLSHIT that you will deal with won't matter anymore because there will be an end in sight.

I hope you read this. I hope it gives you even a little bit of inspiration.

Good luck,
dondante