Author Topic: My Advice  (Read 2233 times)

Offline ineedhelp

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Its been a few years since i came on these forums. as a gyne sufferer for years through my teens and twenties, i felt i was the ONLY one. until i found this place and the support  i received was FANTASTIC!

i now hardly even think about my chest, it feels like it was a different lifetime i had gyne (about 5yrs have passed) however and this may sound really strange, i am GRATEFUL i went through what i did growing up. it makes me appreciate life so much more. i now am full of confidence in so many ways and when i honestly think if i could go back in time and have gyne again, i would probably laugh at it and make a joke about it with my friends!

i know that may sound crazy, but now i can put it all in context and all the crying, hiding and confidence issues i had was because of the shame i felt. now i did have a SERIOUS case of gyne. i mean imagine a slim guy with floppy boobs with hard lumpy breast tissue under! some cases i see on here are so mild or even look like a great model type chest makes me know the mental torture we put on ourselves is the real worst part largely because we see so many perfect looking people on television.

thats not to say i would not have had surgery, it was a great decision for me. cost me 4k in london and although a lot of money, surgery works. it changed me and made me realise that i am the same person was before and i think if i was to go back to having that chest again, i highly doubt i would even be so bothered about it!

the real reason why i think we feel the way we do is because we go through that mental torture in school growing up and never really get to experience what the other lads do. just the general things like wearing a t shirt or going out jogging. i wore jumpers and hoodies through the scorching summer!

i never saw it before because i was so ashamed about myself but i see guys topless or with tight t shirts proudly showing off what we would call on these boards a serious case of gyne! yet those guys could not care less and the truth is, no one really does. the person who cares the most is us because we have a few embarrassing encounters as a child growing up and think the whole world goes home thinking about our man boobs and whenever we walk they are staring at our chest!

so what would be my advice, well pretty much that i would opt for the surgery if you have the option (and if it is really needed). those that are scared, i can tell you i was PETRIFIED but now that i look back on it and the fact i am a bit of an expert in the medical field now, it really is such a simple procedure! but i would say that many on here do not need surgery. just think if you saw a guy walking down the road without a top on and he had a flabby chest, who the hell would really care? no one really!

or heres another - imagine if you saw a hot looking girl walking down the street and she had a scar on her chest and a spot on her forehead, would you say no to her if she asked you for your number? the truth is, you would not really even care about a silly scar and a spot but that girl would be so ashamed of it. she would spend hours trying to cover her spot and scar up and if she was your girlfriend, you would say to her 'stop being so silly, no one cares about a stupid spot and scar'. but she would say 'everyone can see it and i must cover it up, its so embarrassing!'

what i would ask is maybe try to one day go to an area that is far far away from your home and walk in the street without your top on or wear a tight t shirt and see how people react, the reality is, they wont care! we are so afraid of what our local people will say is why we get in to our shell even more.

so i would say to you is if you are thinking of surgery, im pretty certain that after the op and a couple of years later you will think 'was i really beating myself up so much about that?'

hammer

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As a person that has lived with it all my life and has accepted it, I would have to say that you said that all very well! Thank you!

Bob

Offline ineedhelp

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As a person that has lived with it all my life and has accepted it, I would have to say that you said that all very well! Thank you!

Bob

and i am glad you have accepted it! i honestly think if i was back in time now with gyne, i would laugh at it. but that said, i dont think anyone is being silly in feeling down as i was a wreck back then. i just remembered that my username is 'ineedhelp'! as i really needed help back then!

but now that i have had the surgery im not saying that i regret it, just saying that i really do not think it is a big deal at all. i used to worry so much for no reason. the sun is out in england and every other man is walking topless and many with man boobs and love handles and they are happy as anyone! the funny thing is, i have a couple of mates now who are overweight and have 'manboobs' and they both make jokes like 'my boobs are better than yours!'. no one notices, no one cares about it, they both have wives who dont care about it. it really is a non issue and if only i could have understood it at the time before my surgery.

i urge some of you guys the next time you are on holiday or out of town, wear a tight t shirt and walk around like you dont have a care in the world. because the world does not care that a guy has got a bit of flab on his chest!

hammer

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It would also be a good time to remind everyone that WE are our worst critics as you also said others DO NOT look at or notice our chest or man boobs as much as WE think they do!

I happen to be a people watcher, always have been, always will be, and it was very helpful in law enforcement, anyway, when you watch others they are very busy doing so many other things that if anyone was to ask them if they saw you, they wouldn't have a clue what you even looked like even if they looked right at you! This is way it is hard when it comes to finding good witnesses at a crime scene you can get 10 different stories from 10 different people.

As I've said before, I also support surgery, but mr. Ineedofhelp has some very good points that are worth a try, especially for those that really are not that bad! Give it a try and let us know how it goes!


 

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