BREAKING THE ICE...

[Insufferable2]

Hey everyone,

 I'm 18 years old and only recently started properly researching about how to get rid of this condition that's been troubling me since the past 3-4 years. I've started to seriously consider surgery, but I was wondering how to broach this subject with my family. Understandably, it is a sensitive issue and I just can't figure out how to start a discussion. I guess I'm apprehensive about their reaction and honestly become embarrassed just by imaging this conversation. So I'd really appreaciate some help on how to approach this.  

Unfortunately, in the past few weeks my mind has been completely engulfed with this issue and I can't sleep at nights. I've even given up on any social activities and started to become a recluse of sorts. Even my parents have noticed this abnormal behaviour, but they haven't guessed the reason.

I'm really starting to feel helpless...

Thanks in advance guys...

[hammer]

Mom, dad I have a condition or a problem that is really bothering me. It is called gynecomastia, better known as man boobs! Then explain more about it or have the Internet ready to show the facts about it.

[London Man]

Hi. I've just recently had surgery and like you was struggling with how to tell my family. My situation is more complicated as I have a wife and children as well. In the end my personal decision was not to tell them about the specific procedure I was going to have done but just that I was going in for some relatively minor surgery that would involve me being under for about2 hours. Understandably they wanted to know more details but I held out as talking about it especially with the kids was just too difficult. On the day I took along a very close friend who also didn't know the details of the specific procedure but was there to provide moral support during the time waiting to go into theatre. I was keen not to back out at the last minute so his instructions were just to reassure me as best he could. This for me worked well and when I got home I told my wife the details. She was a little upset because she didn't think it necessary but I explained that I had to go through with it for my own sanity and she understood. I think if I'd told her the details of the procedure then she would have tried to talk me out of it.

Good luck with whatever you decide but on the day itself take along a friend for support.

[betterchestnow]

I empathize with you. It is something that is very difficult to discuss.

I am 38 years old, but recently told my family that I was planning to have a bit of minor liposuction. They actually reacted pretty well and were supportive. I am now considering whether to tell them specifically about the gynecomastia. It is amazing how embarrassed I am to just come right out and say it. It feels like I did something bad to need this surgery, yet I know that it is ultimately not my fault.

Honestly, if I were as young as you, I would probably just tell your family. Keeping it a secret is likely causing you more stress than just talking about it would. As long as you have a good relationship with your family, I'm sure they will understand. You are trying to improve yourself... there is nothing to be ashamed of. If something is bothering you, it's good to tell someone you trust. Often, just having another person understand your situation will make you feel better.

I wish I had addressed this problem when I was 18. I have spent my entire adult life living in shame about it. I am now looking at having surgery and just the thought of that feels like getting my life back.

I say, just do it. I thought my family would freak out when I mentioned liposuction. By their reaction, it was a much bigger "secret" to me than to them. They mainly said they just want me to be happy.

[Insufferable2]

Thanks for your replies everybody...
I've started researching on doctors etc and the procedure. Still haven't talked yet though. Maybe tomorrow
Anyway, Im really hoping that I get rid of these this summer

[N8712]

If you want this summer free of the condition you need to be booking surgery NOW. It's May in less than two weeks. Then there's the consultation, and booking the surgery.

Sorry to be blunt, but I had my surgery 10 weeks ago and only now am I starting to see the results I desired.

And YOU WILL NOT REGRET IT. It has changed my life so much for the better, I no longer feel shame wearing tighter t-shirts or have to squeeze my nipples before getting undressed in the locker room.

Good luck.

[rhyno18]

As a patent, I would definitely say tell them.  I know it'll be awkward.  But educate them on the condition and the impacts it's having on you.   As a parent, I'd be relieved that your sudden change in behavior is based on something that's pretty treatable. And there is so much information that's available online now- it's a lot easier to help paint the picture. 

I guess the one thing to be sensitive to is  what your parents can do to help.  If you live in a country where it's covered, fantastic.  If it's in the US, it's a pretty costly procedure.  If you are looking for them to pay, help pay or understand why you'd spend that much of you own money on it you might have to take that into account.