Author Topic: Frustrated with teasing/groping as a kid and adults being ok with it  (Read 1437 times)

Offline CFDerae

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When I was 8/9 I developed breasts and other boys my age would start groping me and I was made fun of by my siblings. I complained (because I knew this was wrong) but was instead told that is was my fault for not doing sports. In their mind fat is the same thing as breast tissue. Basically when the other boys would grope me and stuff it was seen as okay and if I had a problem with it I would have to work out to get rid of the breast. I found it very violating to be groped and I am upset they didn't get in trouble for it. My siblings would also make fun of me and I am upset my parents never said anything to them about how that is not okay. I believed that I had brought this stuff on me as punishment for me not working out/do sports so I hated myself and my body for a long time and thought I deserved groping/ being made fun of. I would later go in shape but breast didn't go away.



Offline CFDerae

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:Plike seriously. what the darn. It feels like men who work out and stuff are afforded privileges to treat men who don't like shit. 

Offline blad

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I think all of us who developed breasts as a teen had various degrees of "teasing" at school. It made for a difficult and embarrassing time growing up. Further, I was constantly told I needed a bra or asked "what my bra size was". There were no resources to help deal with the constant ridicule. 

When I finally tried a bra out of curiosity, I was surprised how well it fit and how I looked wearing a bra. I realized that all the comments of needing a bra were true even if I could not admit that to others.

I became more satisfied about my breasts when I wore a bra. In adult life I began to wear a bra full time as I liked the physical comfort of having the breast tissue supported and just felt better wearing a bra.
If the bra fits, wear it.

Offline Midagemoobs2

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When I was 8/9 I developed breasts and other boys my age would start groping me and I was made fun of by my siblings. I complained (because I knew this was wrong) but was instead told that is was my fault for not doing sports. In their mind fat is the same thing as breast tissue. Basically when the other boys would grope me and stuff it was seen as okay and if I had a problem with it I would have to work out to get rid of the breast. I found it very violating to be groped and I am upset they didn't get in trouble for it. My siblings would also make fun of me and I am upset my parents never said anything to them about how that is not okay. I believed that I had brought this stuff on me as punishment for me not working out/do sports so I hated myself and my body for a long time and thought I deserved groping/ being made fun of. I would later go in shape but breast didn't go away.


I'm sorry you had to live through that; you certainly deserved better especially from adults. I think and hope you are in a better place now.

Offline 42CSurprise!

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This is a story told by quite a few men arriving at this website.  We have had lengthy discussions about such things on the Acceptance side.  You're not alone.  Most of us felt shame at being different.  Some of us experienced both verbal and physical abuse because of having soft chests, and yes, many of us were criticized for being fat.  Unfortunately, kids don't handle differences well, regardless of what makes the other person different.  But we don't need to live with shame.  There is nothing we can do about what happened to us when we were kids, but we have every opportunity as adults to treat ourselves with respect regardless of the condition of our chests.  Please be gentle with yourself my friend.

Offline Justagirl💃

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Perhaps schools could be 'better informed' in the complexities of puberty and developments. 

It seems in many cases the simple birth certificate and gender marker is taken as a ticket for 'either or' locker rooms. Many of us didn't fit in the boy's locker room, and the experience was horrifying. Kids are cruel. 

Coaches can be rather mean as well, and they will make sure your assets are noticed, intentionally or not.

Gender neutral shower stalls and restrooms are really the only way to remedy the situation. 
When life gives you curves,
flaunt them! 💃
💋Birdie💋

Offline Busty

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When I was 8/9 I developed breasts and other boys my age would start groping me and I was made fun of by my siblings. I complained (because I knew this was wrong) but was instead told that is was my fault for not doing sports. In their mind fat is the same thing as breast tissue. Basically when the other boys would grope me and stuff it was seen as okay and if I had a problem with it I would have to work out to get rid of the breast. I found it very violating to be groped and I am upset they didn't get in trouble for it. My siblings would also make fun of me and I am upset my parents never said anything to them about how that is not okay. I believed that I had brought this stuff on me as punishment for me not working out/do sports so I hated myself and my body for a long time and thought I deserved groping/ being made fun of. I would later go in shape but breast didn't go away.


That happened to me. A lot!


 

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