Author Topic: Depressed  (Read 4918 times)

Offline zado611

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Every day I wake up with the same yucky feeling knowing i have to go through that day worrying about my chest constantly. I cant go out and enjoy myself around friends bc of my moobs being their keeping me behind a wall of built up emotions over the years. I can't wait till i get out the house and get a job after I recover frm a recent back surgery. Maybe then i can have enough money to pay for surgery seems like my only way for escape bc losing weight isn't helping. GOD PLZ DELIVER ME. There hasnt been a day i woke up in the last 6-7 years feeling excited about the day. I have been in slight depression for that time span as well. Sometimes the days are worse than others. Like the last few days i just wanted to give up on life and just go hide in my room and not come out. I bought a design veronique vest the one that bermeant recommends about 2 months ago(thinking it would help me a little as far as confidence in social settings) and it doesnt help it maybe hides 25% OF MY PROBLEM. I NEED HELP. PLZ keep me in your thoughts and prayers.

Offline Paa_Paw

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I usually make it a point not to get religeous here but you opened the door for me to do just that.

Re-read the Sermon on the Mount. Especially Matt. ch 7, v 7&8.

Ask, Seek, and Knock are all verbs. You have a Heavenly Father who really wants to be of help, but you must take all the action you can for yourself.

Keep up the good work already done with your weight loss and keep up your faith.. If you do your part it will all work out OK.

As for me, I will remember you as you asked.
Grandpa Dan

Offline waves

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Hang in there Zado, there are brighter rainbows over the horizon.  Gyno can be extremely depressing, but there are things you can do to help improve the quality of your life.  Here are some I would recommend:

1)  See your doctor.  Talk to him about your condition, but more the effect it is causing on you.  Specifically how depressed you are, how much you dread each day and how you don't want to leave the house.  There are medicines that can help with depression.  Physical activity can also help with depression (run in the dark if you have to with a headlamp), but that may not be an option with your back.

2)  Try different compression shirts.  I didn't have a lot of success until I tried the "Extreme Chest Concealer from Underworks (style #988)  It's amazingly restricting over the chest area, but notice how it is not constricting over the stomach (I can breath!).

3)  When you are able to work/save money, start counting down the days until you can afford surgery.  It will give you something to look forward to each day.

Hope this helps.  It did for me!

DrBermant

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Every day I wake up with the same yucky feeling knowing i have to go through that day worrying about my chest constantly. I cant go out and enjoy myself around friends bc of my moobs being their keeping me behind a wall of built up emotions over the years. I can't wait till i get out the house and get a job after I recover frm a recent back surgery. Maybe then i can have enough money to pay for surgery seems like my only way for escape bc losing weight isn't helping. GOD PLZ DELIVER ME. There hasnt been a day i woke up in the last 6-7 years feeling excited about the day. I have been in slight depression for that time span as well. Sometimes the days are worse than others. Like the last few days i just wanted to give up on life and just go hide in my room and not come out. I bought a design veronique vest the one that bermeant recommends about 2 months ago(thinking it would help me a little as far as confidence in social settings) and it doesnt help it maybe hides 25% OF MY PROBLEM. I NEED HELP. PLZ keep me in your thoughts and prayers.

Yes, there can be a great deal of emotion involved living with gynecomastia. The effectiveness of garments depends on the degree of the underlying problem. That is why I actually put up examples to demonstrate such issues by taking men with varying types of gynecomastia / body fat and showing the effect of garment on that contour. In my opinion that is a much more effective demonstration than a sales pitch showing only something that works. As shown, it will not take someone who is obese, and because of the obesity has large male breasts, and make them not look obese. For patients who come to my office for an evaluation, we go one step further: we have actual garments for them to try on. That way individuals can see for themselves what the garments offer and their limitations before even buying one. For these patients I suggest that they jump up and down and bend over in front of a mirror with their chest exposed. Then repeat the jumping and bending over with the garment. Then repeat it again with street cloths on the garment. That is the best demonstration I can offer. The neat thing to watch is the emotion on these patients faces or the faces of their family, spouse, or friend. It is quite impressive seeing their faces watching the garments in action limitations and all.

The garment can be an emotional band-aide and so many have told me helped temporize the situation until they were able to lose weight, get an endocrine problem under control, or wait until they could afford surgery. It has become a temporizing tool, but one with limitations.

Weight loss can and does help with the fat component, but will not help with remaining gland. Major weight loss can also result in a loose skin component. This loose skin alone can cause a contour issue.

On Dec. 1, I decided to take a leap into a new lifestyle that would hopefully end up in a healthier and happier me. Its been 3 months since that defining moment.  I have been dieting by eating lots of vegetables, fruits, and baked meats and drinking 8 glasses of water everyday. All this while eliminating sodas, fried foods, chocolate, candy, and anything you can think of thats fattening and loaded with carbs.  So far I have lost 40 pounds going from 290 to 250. The results are showing up in my stomach however my chest is not really strinking that much at all. I believe that dieting is harder for those with Gynecomastia because you can easily discouraged when it seems your chest is getting bigger because your stomach is getting smaller. I have found this to be true because lately I've been getting depressed over the fact that it seems my chest is not budging which is the primary reason i went on a diet to loose some of this fat in my chest.  I just want to be able to enjoy normal everyday activities w/o having to worry about my chest constantly.  Maybe if i get down to a proper weight around 205 or so i will see where I'm @ and consider surgery. I went on this diet without doing the surgery first b/c the doctors on here were saying i needed to lose weight first, so I am taking their advice and hopefully it all turns out good. Has anybody had this happen to them? Tell me about it.

40 pounds is quite an achievement. I see so many men who in the process of losing that weight get frustrated and want to just finish the process already. I describe the condition a "Work in Progress," and during my consultations try to encourage them to continue.

Surgery is not a good jump starting tool in such cases. The issue is weight loss before surgery is usually better than weight loss after. Men tend to put fat first on the breast and belly areas. We take it off these regions last. Surgery is not an alternative to losing weight, you can only go down to what the global fat contour is. Contour the body to this global level, then lose weight? If it comes of the normal way for men, and not as much comes of the chest region, it will look like the gynecomastia has returned.

This becomes really critical in the major weight loss patients when there is a loose sagging skin component. Do surgery first and then lose more weight? What makes you think that your skin will shrink after the subsequent weight loss? If is is going to shrink, why bother with the earlier surgery?  Is it worth the risk of needing a revision after the additional weight loss?

Be careful to look for before and after surgery pictures of someone saying that surgery as a jump start tool works. How many operations did it take to get there? Investigate if patients shown needed revision or are the images after the revisions? Words alone are not enough to understand the many issues involved, you need to see examples, what did it take to get there, and preferably how the tissues move.

Surgery can work for the individual who is willing to accept compromise. In such cases, breasts are made smaller, they are still there. If going that route, look for examples before and after surgery to better understand the limitations of what surgery really offers when global fat remains an issue.

Hope this helps,

Michael Bermant, M.D.
Board Certified
American Board of Plastic Surgery
Member: American Society of Plastic Surgeons and American Society of Aesthetic Plastic Surgeons
Specializing in Gynecomastia and Surgical Sculpture of the Male Chest
(804) 748-7737
« Last Edit: March 16, 2011, 10:20:21 AM by DrBermant »

Offline pokeweed

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Zado, As both a Christian and also one who has dealt with both gyne and depression, I want to encourage you to speak to your Dr. or a specialist about what you're going through. To say that you've not had a happy day in 6-7 years AND that you just want to go in a room and never come out, are NOT signs of being in a slight depression. They are signs of depression. My battle lasted 2 years and treatment gave me a new life. I want to encourage you to do that quickly and talk to someone...not about the gyne, though you can bring that up as a possible source of your feelings...but to talk about your lack of desire to function in life. That should be your first concern. They gyne can be taken care of in time.  I was 56 when I finally had my surgery...but medical intervention on my depression gave me my life back at 42!!  You deserve to enjoy life NOW even with the gyne. It can be done.  God bless you on your journey to healing on every level.

Offline Mark102

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Hi Zado, I kind of know how you feel as waking up everyday thinking "ok, so how am I going to hide my man boobs today?" Its a daily thing and I'm "Sick and tired of always being sick and tired"

Since you do seem to have depression, I have heard, but am not positive that some people have gotten their surgery covered by insurance because the gyne was so emotionally damaging their lives..maybe you can see into that and get some help also?

God bless, and good luck!

Offline zado611

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I really appreciate everybodies uplifting comments and advice truly means alot.. glad to know i have somewhere to go to talk about this problem that nobody around me understands

Offline Paa_Paw

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We are all in here for the same reasons. You are among friends here.

Offline Entouragee

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Sounds like your my twin

Offline zado611

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@Entouragee yea man i look forward to the day i can get up and just be happy ready to take on the day with no worries about my chest.. that day will be one of the best days of my life by far it kinda puts a smile on my face thinking about it.. i find myself daydreaming about it often and i look at other ppl that don't have this problem and so badly wish i could just for one minute get to be them.. to live everyday without man boobs, to be able to enjoy a nice day outside, to be able to enjoy a vacation, to be able to enjoy swimming again, to be able to enjoy hanging out with friends... gosh i wish i was having the surgery tomorrow.. WHAT A GREAT LIFE THAT WOULD BE

Offline Entouragee

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@Entouragee yea man i look forward to the day i can get up and just be happy ready to take on the day with no worries about my chest.. that day will be one of the best days of my life by far it kinda puts a smile on my face thinking about it.. i find myself daydreaming about it often and i look at other ppl that don't have this problem and so badly wish i could just for one minute get to be them.. to live everyday without man boobs, to be able to enjoy a nice day outside, to be able to enjoy a vacation, to be able to enjoy swimming again, to be able to enjoy hanging out with friends... gosh i wish i was having the surgery tomorrow.. WHAT A GREAT LIFE THAT WOULD BE
I very much feel the same way and its had a big impact on my life too. That date is not to far for me, i'm having surgery on April 21 and i'm literally counting down the hours...I remember swimming when I was very young like 8-12 and I can't wait for a day I can just leave the house without this problem

Offline zado611

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wow that awesome that you are getting the surgery.. wish i was in the same boat being just 18 and no way of working cuz of my back surgery i just had is kinda hard to get it done but glad to hear that you are about to live that life that i can only dream about:)

Offline fedex

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Zado,
I will keep you in my prayers. I am also depressed and havemlow confidence from gyne. We are with you and know what it feels like. I may opt for surgery but i cannot even take the steps to find a recommended surgeon in my area; im embarassed about it.

Offline PatrickS

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wow that awesome that you are getting the surgery.. wish i was in the same boat being just 18 and no way of working cuz of my back surgery i just had is kinda hard to get it done but glad to hear that you are about to live that life that i can only dream about:)

I work and im 18, it would of taken me a long time to save up the money. But i built up the courage to speak to my parents about it and they paid for my surgery (had surgery 10 days ago). Now all i do is give them a bit of money back every month to pay back my debt.

It helps a lot to speak to your parents.

Offline zado611

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PatrickS- I did do that and to be honest it was kinda weird and haven't spoken about it since i spilt it out on them and it was just awkward.. i tlked about it like for a whole week and they finally said once they get the money they would help out even though i told them i would get a job.. since that time(6-7 months ago) they havent brought it up at all so looks like its up too me


 

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