so close to a great life

[jam14]

This is my first post on this site, I have never opened up to anybody about this before, but I see people on here have gone are go through what I do and im sure someone can help.

I'm 16 years old, I have (not bragging or lying) an unusually attractive girlfriend, mostly because shes younger then i am and was unaware of any rumours about whats under my clothes like every other girl my age at my school. I have a good family life and  up until recently a normal social life. At school i was the funny guy, people would come up to me in the halls and tell me how sick i was or they cant wait till next semester when im in there class. Not the case anymore. Im still funny and people still laugh at my jokes but the jocks who had some kind of respect for me in years past will slap my chest when they walk past me or sometimes squeeze my chest. It is so humiliating. Now even people who ive been friends with for years do it and act like they're cooler and better then i am and its so depressing. I know there are people on here who have larger body types and thats why they have the flabby chests but mine is different. Ive had a slim body my whole life and if i had a normal chest not only would i have the confidence every other ignorant teenage boy has but my entire life would not be heading in the direction it is. I haven't done any math homework since mid-September and marks in all my classes are below average. I'm just completely unmotivated and I feel like nothing really matters. The situation with my gf ( fake name : anne) is unusual. I have an attractive face, and so poor unsuspecting girls get interested in me and anne is a girl who is beautiful and does great in school but has serious issues at home and neither parents have ever told her they love her. I know she needs some kind of father figure so thats likely why she went for an older guy like me, and why she is so trusting and reliant on me . so 4 months ago she started talking to me on the bus and fell for me. We Were making out 1 day in my basement and she was kindve on top of me ( we had clothes on) anyway she squeezed my busting chest, stopped kissing me but giggled, i pretended like nothing happened and kissed her and we resumed. Anyway since then they're have been many instances like; bra commercial comes on tv she suggests she gets me one, another instance on the bus when she outright said i had boobs, and it seems whenever she thinks im not looking shes glancing at my chest. I'm not even sure i like her anymore but I know things wont be much different with another girl who would not be as pretty, considering i can get another girl to be with me, and she is the only thing keeping me from being a huge joke. While people will still make a comment about my chest to me or give it a poke or a slap I still can play the "my girlfriend is hotter then any girl youve been with" card, and if i lost anne (who has made me push away close female friends) i feel like I would drop even more on the social totem pole and I would have nothing and no one. Thanks for reading everything, any tips or advice or hopeful remarks would be greatly appreciated.

[hammer]

Jam, it sounds like your girl friend is accepting your gynecomastia! If she is, that is a sign of a keeper!

Please don't let the gyne bring your self esteem so low and be so depressed. You are still the same person before the natural body changes that you are going through. Everyone goes through them, however, some don't go away on their own with time, but that doesn't change who you are! That is just body, flesh and breast mass and it is all very natural and nothing you had control over. SO DON'T LET IT CONTROL YOU. It is fixable also as you can see by reading post in this forum.

If you feel comfortable with the idea, maybe it is time to open up with gf about this. Show her this forum so she can get an understanding about gyne.

Hold your head up, be proud of who you are! You are a good person, don't let this or anyone bring you down!

Bob aka Hammer

[transformSoon]

Also, consider getting  a good compression vest till the time you decide for your next action plan. Vest will help you hide them to an extent while wearing clothes. Ultimately you will have to go under the knife, best will be to save money and get it done once you have funds.

On the brighter side I think you are lucky you found this forum at the age of 16. I lived with gyno for 20 years before finding this forum. I haven't been more happier since I have got my surgery done.  On side note I was not depressed before my gyno surgery just bit frustrated once in a while. I think you are more than a person than your gyno. You have a curable condition and it is not something which is like end of the world. Plan well and get your life back - all the best!

[codemiester2006]

I feel ya bro... its sorta hard to go unnoticed... but I guess its sorta one of those things on weather you can see malicious intent in what she says. It sounds like she may be joking with you to maybe make you lighten up about it. I am 23 and I wish there was some miracle thing I could tell you to ease your worry but there isnt. All I can say is be thrifty and by the time you are my age you can have the surgery to have them removed. I made it thru adolecence by the skin of my teeth it was mostly unpleasant... yea people pinch and carry on (freakin assholes) but anyway honestly the best advise I can give is F*** 'EM who knows you may be a famous musician or a Actor or something one day. I mean you could invent a gyne compression vest and make zillions... just try to look at what you can be instead of what you are not. I feel ya pain better than you know. I fortunately never recall many girls picking on them, mostly guys... but think those jock guys will prob do steroids in college and then they will get blessed with some MASSIVE boobies.. paybacks a b**** right? ha ha well good luck mate... remember SAVE... u will need about 5000 for sure then the rest u could prob put on a credit card... I wish you luck bro.

[riot1234]

I would not tell your girlfriend about this website and your condition, i think if she is 14-15 she may get freaked out by it and not understand and might tell others if you do not stay together.

Best thing for you to do is wear a compression vest ect to hide them. Then try get by until you have finished developing (18-19)as some gyne appears at puberty but goes away once you have developed and matured.

In the mean time save up as much money as you can and possibly ask you parents for assistance to pay for surgery when the time is right.

You said dudes were grabbing ya nipples then ya mates doing it too thinking they are cool..... that sounds like the most frustrating and annoying situation in the world.

All the best dude

[greatlakes]

What riot1234 said - tell your GF NOTHING about your feelings about this, the condition, or if you have the surgery. Sorry, if this sounds anti-female, but she will tell others at some point everything about you- and your body - and your feelings. Females are just like that.  My best advise is that if you have the surgery - you  have the surgery between GF's or at a time when you are not intimate with a particular GF.

[hammer]

You know, as I think about this, you guys are probably right and say nothing. This is very sad! I know that woman can be very vindictive, and that can remove the most important person in your life at the time, some times. At the age you are at, I agree that this would be best.

This is also very sad to say the least, If one can not depend on a friend at a time of need for support. To not have the trust with someone that you are intimate with, and I see intimate as getting married one day, (not friends with benefits) then it is no wonder that divorce rate is so high.

[greatlakes]

Yes women can be vindictive - I know this first hand. No what I was really saying is females, even good ones, like to "share" with others  - mainly with their girlfriends. Not in a mean way - they just do it without much thought - share stuff we guys would never share. Wives do this too.

[hammer]

I have to tell you that I have a wife and one daughter that are not open enough! I am serious guys! People have a hard time getting to knew them because of it. On the other hand the other daughter and I are far to open!

So in my house hold it is I that would say to much, but I do knew when to not say anything as well and so does the daughter that is very open. We both know how to be discrete. I have a sister in-law who is like the wife, in fact she is so tight lipped sometimes I fear my brother could have a heart attack again and she might not let us know, even though he and I are best friends and we do all our holidays together. Now I know that is extreme, but I need to make a point. In the end I believe it depends on personality.

As a young man I had the great experience of traveling almost around the world thanks to the Navy. Six of the seven continents to be exact, all but the Antarctica . With this I have been able to meet and get to know many people from many walks of life, both male and female and if I learned anything it was you can't lump people into a category, because no one is alike, you can even find differences in identical twins.

There is an old saying, telegraph, telephone, tell-a-woman, however, I am a people watcher, and I had noticed as portable cell phone started to become more popular, there were far more men with them then women. Go figure.  

[jam14]

Hey thanks for all your input!
(Bare with me it's another long one)
It's been about a month since that post and I have gone with the advice to not show her this site or address my chest. Only problem with that is she draws her own conclusions and while the truth isn't pretty I know she has run to friends and her sister and told them about her boyfriends situation. And there is no way i can admit that i have gynecomastia to her or anybody but that means i have to stress that its just muscle..anyway about a week ago she got me to take my shirt off and show her my acne-ridden shoulders (the lie i told her as to why i dont like being shirtless) and i stood in front of her in her poorly lit basement trying to flex the pec muscle hidden under my flabby chest. She said i was totally hot and i said im just uncomfortable cuz im a lot buffer on my right and it looks lopsided (kinda true) and so she said noo and reached out and squeezed them both for a second. I talked quickly after that and tried to hide my embarrassment, but somehow i talked her into being shirtless too. it was the weirdest/best turn of events i can remember and definitely one of my better days. Anyway she still says she misses me and all the things she would before this but she has been treating me with less respect then she used too. It's frustrating but she is really pretty and i know im lucky to have her, in fact she is probably the only reason im not the joke of the school since jealous guys respect me cuz im with her. either way i really don't know what my next move should be, or if things will ever really get better or if "regular people" problems will also add up and my life will be even more tragic.
advice? ideas? inspiration stories?
and sorry for whining so much on my posts, i feel pretentious after i do it but this is the only place i have to vent

[hitchcock]

I know it's all a big part of growing up but try to move beyond worrying what other jealous guys think because of your relationship and whether or not you'd be a joke without her.

The less you think of life that way the happier you will be. When you get older none of that BS matters. No one remembers who was the cool guy, who dated the hot chick, etc.

[hammer]

I know it's all a big part of growing up but try to move beyond worrying what other jealous guys think because of your relationship and whether or not you'd be a joke without her.

The less you think of life that way the happier you will be. When you get older none of that BS matters. No one remembers who was the cool guy, who dated the hot chick, etc.

hitchcock, hit that right on the head! You may not believe it right now but there will come a day if you would decide to attend a high school reunion very few people will even remember your name, let alone the things that you fear!

I am beyond the 35TH reunion now and don't even bother to go. I don't know anyone any more except for the ones that live near by, and they don't go either.