Well... I'm on the other side!!
Feeling bruised, knackered and a bit all over the shop, but wanted to check in with you all and let you know how it's gone.
I know there are loads of stories on here about the operation day, but I found each and every one immensely helpful when I was researching/preparing for, so I'm going do the same. My apologies as this is definitely going to be
long one!
So, I'd been having difficulty getting to sleep all week worrying about the op; things racing through my mind and I was convinced something was going to go wrong. But surprisingly, the night before I actually slept pretty well, so the 6am start wasn't too bad. (I live in North London so the hospital is only a short tube journey away).
I arrived there just before 7am and made my way to St Clare's Ward on the 1st floor. I was greeted by a nurse (the same nurse who looked after me all day). She was really nice and made me feel at ease straight away. She took me to my room - very nice too. Flat screen TV, own bathroom... if it wasn't for the hospital bed, it would've looked like a hotel room.
Anyway I settled in, filled in some forms with the nurse about my medical history, ordered my lunch and then I was told to get changed into the gown and some very fetching surgical socks:
The infamous see-through undies were on the bed too (I thought they were a shower cap at first!) The nurse said if I had cotton boxers on then I didn't need to wear them. Luckily I'd read about that on this forum, so I'd made sure I was wearing cotton ones. Great tip because those undies wouldn't leave
anything to the imagination!
I was told I'd be going down for surgery just after 9am. Had a visit from the anaesthetist who explained a bit about what he was going to do, then
Dr. Karidis came in to mark me up and take some photos. Just like in the consultation he was relaxed and confident (which I found really reassuring). While marking me up, he said something like "Just an hour to go and then it'll be flat city for you!" Haha... a bit cringe worthy like, but I appreciated the sentiment!
So then it was just an hour or so in the room waiting to go down. I didn't really feel nervous at all. Or excited. Or anything really. It just all felt really, really surreal. Like it wasn't happening to me. Very hard to explain.
Anyway the time passed by fairly quickly; I had my partner with me so we just chatted and watched the telly until my nurse came back in and said it was time to go. She took me down in the lift to the theatre and into a small side room where the anaesthetist was, with another male nurse. I lay down on the trolley and started chatting to the anaesthetist and the nurse. They both had grown up in Liverpool (where I'm originally from) so we talked about that while the anaesthetist was putting a canula into my left arm. Then he said something like, "just putting this in now, you'll probably feel a bit drunk". After a few seconds, I could feel buzzing in my temples and then I went lightheaded and that's all I remember...
I've read a few times about GA that people say "and the next thing I knew I was awake". It wasn't like that for me; I definitely felt a passage of time (albeit a short one). I definitely remember dreaming, so it just felt like I'd been asleep for a bit. I came around in the recovery room, looked at the clock and it was 11am. As expected, I was really groggy and didn't really come to properly for another half hour or so, I just kept drifting off back to sleep.
When I did wake up properly, I was actually in quite a lot of pain and was shivering loads. The pain was right across my chest and all over the tops of my arms. It felt as if my chest had been ripped open. Like it was raw almost. My mind was a bit all over the place too. I didn't know what was going on.
A nurse came over and asked me if I was OK and whether I was in any pain. I don't know why but I automatically lied and said "not really, just a little bit". I must've looked like shit because she said "Are you sure it's not a lot?" So I just nodded this time. I'd say the pain was about an 8 or 9 out of 10. I actually felt like I was going to cry with it at one point. She injected me with some morphine and got me this heater thing which she put under the covers to warm me up. Once again I was out of it for a while.
When I woke up it was about 12:30, the pain had subsided to a dull ache, but I still felt like I'd been ran over. The nurse and a porter came down to take me back up to my room. Before I left the recovery room they must've given me another shot of morphine, because at this point, I was off my face. Felt like I was floating in space. Got wheeled back into the room, where I had to shift back on to my bed and get a drip put in me. Spent the next hour or so drifting off into sleep and, as I found out later, chatting absolute shit to my partner!
On the bright side, the pain had gone down to about a 5/10. But my throat was quite dry so I was gulping down loads of water. I was starving too, so as soon as the nurse came back in I asked if I could have my lunch. After I'd had that and had my blood pressure/oxygen levels taken (which the nurse came to take every half an hour for the rest of the afternoon). Then I went back to sleep again for another hour or two. I think the whole thing just took it out of me. Plus, I had quite a bad case of gyne so I reckon they must've took a lot of fat/gland out of me - I still need to find out how much exactly...
Anyway, I started feeling relatively "normal" again at about 4pm. I'd been for a wee twice, and the nurse said everything was OK with my blood pressure, so I was free to go once one of Karidis' nurses had been to see me. She came about 4.30pm, explained the after-care procedure, answered any questions and gave me another compression vest (I'd already had the first one put on during the op.) Then the nurse came back in with some medicine: some co-drydamol for pain relief, some laxatives in case I get constipated (I can tell you now, that is
definitely a side-effect, as is farting loads??!), plus some waterproof plasters/extra dressings. And that was it. I got changed, called a taxi and went back home.
Didn't have the greatest sleep last night, I'm not going to lie. I sleep on my side normally, so adjusting to sleeping propped out on my back was difficult. I'm sure I'll get used to it though. The painkillers are definitely helping and the pain is now on about a 3 or 4 out of 10. It just feels really tight with the compression vest on and I feel quite achy all over. Kind of like I've got the flu or something. It's definitely bearable, but I'm so glad I've got the weekend and a few more days off work to recover.
One of the worst parts of it all was this morning, taking the vest off and the bandages for the first time. I haven't got a very hairy chest so didn't take the advice I'd read here about trimming it, or my underarm hairs. Big mistake. The tape absolutely KILLS when you take it off - it's like getting waxed or something. I had to cut literally half of my armpit hairs just to get them off. Also, I felt like I didn't want to pull too hard because I felt as if I was going to rip something off. I had visions of my nipple coming off inside the plaster!
It's a really strange experience seeing your chest like that for the first time. The after-care notes Karidis provides describes it as "europhia" but I wouldn't exactly say that. It just looks weird, like it doesn't belong to you. A very strange experience that actually made me feel a bit light-headed and shaky. (Make sure you've got somewhere to sit down when you're doing this.)
Anyway after a lot of wincing, I eventually took all the bandages/plasters off, put on the waterproof ones on the incision sites (1 on each nipple, 1 at the top of each armpit - absolutely tiny marks you can hardly see alreadt) and then I got a shower. My nipples started bleeding when I got out the shower for some reason, so I had to change the plasters again.
I'd expected my chest to look concave, but not as much as it does: It's
beyond flat. If I hadn't read the accounts on this forum, I'd probably be a bit worried. But I know it's just because of the tight bandages that were on it, because it's only the first day after the op and because things have to settle down a lot before it starts looking "normal". I'm not actually worried about it at all. After reading everything on here and seeing the results for myself, I've got faith it's all going to sort itself out.
Anyway, I know this is the start of another journey now. I know it's going to be a roller-coaster, but I do feel relieved at being on the other side already. To be honest with you, it actually feels a little bit like an anti-climax. All that building up of it in my head and it was over in a few hours. I just feel like I want it to hurry up and heal now so I can get on with my life and never have to think about gyne again!
One last photo for today. I couldn't resist putting a t-shirt on that I'd bought a year ago and never worn because it made me look like I had an actual woman's chest. I took a photo of me in the t-shirt on Wednesday night and then took one of me in it this morning after I'd took my bandages/vest off. The difference in 24 hours is unbelievable. Now that's what I call "euphoria"...