Diagnosed One Year Ago - A recap on what I have experienced

[iam32bit]

Good day to all.  I want to start off by saying this past year was a rollercoaster ride of emotions.  I will break it down to a few points and my thoughts on them.
I would like to thank the following members for their support,
-   Hammer
-   Del
-   Paa_Paw
-   Anon E Mouse
-   Bman41

Bra use
There is nothing wrong with wearing a bra.  That is a bold statement for today's ass backwards society.  When our breasts need support due to the weight and movement of tissue why can’t a bra be the solution?  It is for many of us and should be considered a normal solution for support.  Even though I sometimes feel guilty when wearing a bra, it is the stigma that stays in your head for a while.  I will admit it gets much easier over time.  But one thing to keep in mind, growing breasts wasn’t a choice for 99% of us (yes there are some who really want breasts, all I can say is good for you) why are we forced to lay low and suffer?  My opinion of non-utilitarian bra use is meh.  I honestly don’t care what gets people off.  But when someone is suffering the same way I am, I want to offer as much support as possible.  I don’t think it is a good idea to just wear a bra out in the open.

Bra Fitting
I have yet to get the courage to actually go through with one, but my girlfriend is pushing me to do it.  I am sure I am wearing the wrong size (36B).  I called a few stores and they said they would be perfectly fine in performing a bra fitting.  I expect to do this soon.

Acceptance
I view Acceptance as realizing what you have will affect your life.  Learning to cope with your condition means more than anything.  Like I mentioned earlier, I battle the thought every now and then.  Did I accept the condition I was diagnosed with?  Yes and no.  I accept the fact that I have a condition, but can’t accept that we live in an ass backwards society.  It’s ok for a man to have Gynecomasita and be topless, but not for a woman?  To me they are the same thing, both of our breasts are comprised of the same tissue.

Surgery
Surgery isn’t really for us, it is for everyone else.  I will say that there is no medical need to remove my breasts.  It isn’t life threatening, therefor surgically removing them would be for cosmetic reasons.  I know not everyone agrees with this but please understand that if most men had breasts, then the status quo would dictate that it was desirable.  Therefor no one would want to remove them.  If having breasts is too much to bear, then that is your choice to remove them.  Also understand where you get your information from.  This forum is owned and managed by Surgeons.  They have a bias towards making money off of procedures.  It isn’t speculation it is just the way it is.

Family support
My family has been mixed in the support department.  I can safely say they would prefer that I never grew breast in the first place, however their suggestions and research into removing them is not supporting the issue.  My parents were more in the denial phase and said the usual “you should do some exercise to remove them”.  My significant other has been the most supportive during this whole thing.  She agrees that it is stupid that a man wearing a bra is taboo.

Concealment
I think we kind of feel like Elsa from Frozen.  There is a part in the Song "Do you want to build a Snowman" where you see Elsa and her father putting gloves on her hand.  There is a quote "Conceal it, don't feel it, don't let it show" we are taught to be ashamed with this condition.  There are tons of people telling us to wear concealment garments. Most guys want to conceal their breast so they fit in.  I am on the fence personally, I just want to be left alone and be comfortable.  A regular bra doesn’t conceal, but is much more comfortable than wearing a Sports Bra all day long.  Me being comfortable means I would have people look and stare at something that isn’t “normal”.  Summer it is even harder, I love swimming but I wear a SPT (sun protectant t-shirt).  When going to water parks, sometimes you are forced to take it off to go on certain waterslides.  I hated it as it was the first time certain family members saw my breasts bare.  My one family member made the comment “Your breasts are bigger than mine”.  Got to love my family.  It would be very hard to see our society allowing Bikini Tops for men.  I do think there should be a Sports bra like top for swimming.

Fetish Communities
Unfortunately our condition attracts a sexual fetish community.  Crossdressers and transvestites love the idea of growing breasts.  They need to however stop getting in the way of support.  They on a regular basis make comments like “You are so lucky to have real breasts”.  Yes in their eyes we are “Lucky” but we don’t feel that way about the condition.  Trust me I would love to give my breasts away to someone else.

Some of us are victims
Point is those of us who grew breasts due to side effects of Medications are victims and should be treated as such.  Since taking Risperdal wasn’t my choice I have bottled up anger at those who indirectly caused my breast growth.  It makes matters worse when the same people who indirectly caused it are trying to convince you to get surgery and work out.  I think there is much needed support for those who are going through the same circumstances.

Too much wrong information
If you search up Gynecomastia you are bound to find horribly written articles making the false claim that you can “Cure” yourself by working out or taking meds.  The issue stems from a lack of separation between Gynecomastia and Pseudogynecomastia.  Pseudogynecomastia is mostly fat, Gynecomastia is mostly breast tissue.  Breast tissue cannot be reduced by working out.  However since there is a blurred line between the two conditions, people are led to believe that all men with breasts can remove them simply by working out.  Point is, have your doctor check you first before you start researching.

There is a magic pill
My doctor once said that there is a pill she could prescribe to remove the breast tissue.  It is used for Cancer Patients to get rid of Breast Cancer.  She said “I wouldn’t be doing my job if I prescribed it to you.  There are just too many possible side effects.”  Yes you could ultimately take this Anti-Cancer drug, but the risks are just too high.

Thanks again to all.  I am interested in what you guys think of my points and if you agree or disagree with them.

[hammer]

Welcome to the club of reality! Very good points! I myself having gyne all my life have no idea why any MAN would "want" breast, but as you well know "we", that is, me and my family are having no problem with acceptance along with some out side the family too now.

When I was still working as a contractor, one of the last years that I still worked I was attaching an existing garage to an existing home with a breeze way. The home owner was from Germany and her sister was here visiting. Her sister said to her in German that I needed a bra, I was around a "D" then. I turn to the home owner and asked "what did she say", oh, nothing and I reminded her that my first wife was from Germany and I could understand part of what she said. She then told me. I told her, "when a man loses his BALLS that's what happens, he grows really big BOOBS"" and she felt real bad then, and  apologized!

Even after all these years of wearing a bra off and on and now having all the support of love ones, my doctor telling me that I should, I still get mixed feelings about it, that is, I feel funny putting it on! Not as often, as I use to, but no matter what people think about it I'm still more man then most of them will ever be, with or without bra or balls!

[Bman41]

Yeah, there are a lot of people who are pretty fetish about it.  I just don't entertain them. 

My wife knows, my kids probably do (hard to miss my bras in the bathroom and they go in there, at 40C underwires and my wife a 40DD wirefree, they are different in size).  I don't care for wirefree, I feel like it makes me much more noticeable and more monoboob looking.

I have gone to Soma a couple times to buy a bra on clearance, they are more than welcoming to let you try on.  I haven't got a fitting yet, but I probably should.  Call ahead.  I have called and spoke someone and told them what I was looking for and told them it was for me as I had a medical issue and needed a bra.  They didn't question it at all. 

Soma and Cacique are known to be good about it.  I have gone in later in the day, bad weather days are ideal to be less crowded.  I went in Soma in Orland Park and they brought in someone next to me and didn't question it or make me feel in anyway uncomfortable.  I haven't been to a Cacique yet, but I have heard on another forum they are very good about fitting and allowing trying it on and helping you with fit. 

At first it was a big thing to worry about others thoughts, now I really just don't, but I don't flaunt it, I just don't want to draw attention to it. 

[Paa_Paw]

I think you summed things up quite nicely.

[iam32bit]

Yeah, there are a lot of people who are pretty fetish about it.  I just don't entertain them. 

My wife knows, my kids probably do (hard to miss my bras in the bathroom and they go in there, at 40C underwires and my wife a 40DD wirefree, they are different in size).  I don't care for wirefree, I feel like it makes me much more noticeable and more monoboob looking.

I have gone to Soma a couple times to buy a bra on clearance, they are more than welcoming to let you try on.  I haven't got a fitting yet, but I probably should.  Call ahead.  I have called and spoke someone and told them what I was looking for and told them it was for me as I had a medical issue and needed a bra.  They didn't question it at all. 

Soma and Cacique are known to be good about it.  I have gone in later in the day, bad weather days are ideal to be less crowded.  I went in Soma in Orland Park and they brought in someone next to me and didn't question it or make me feel in anyway uncomfortable.  I haven't been to a Cacique yet, but I have heard on another forum they are very good about fitting and allowing trying it on and helping you with fit. 

At first it was a big thing to worry about others thoughts, now I really just don't, but I don't flaunt it, I just don't want to draw attention to it. 

I hate cloths shopping.  My Fiancé insists that I try everything on before leaving the store.  Imagine how much I debated going to get a Bra Fitting.  After getting tired of wearing a Sports Bra for 10+ hours a day, I decided it was time to finally get a real bra fitting and start wearing regular t-shirt bras instead.

I called both Victoria's Secret and Soma.  I was rather surprised at the response I got over the phone.  When I called VS's Customer Support line they gave me all of the nearby store's numbers.  They told me that VS will provide service to whomever asks, but I should call the store directly to give them a heads up. 

I called 3, the first one said I would have to come in at 10AM on Monday or Tuesday. 

The second one was horrible, a woman picked up the phone, I said “I am a man who has Gynecomastia, I am looking to arrange a fitting” She chuckles and says, “Do you know that you called a Bra Store?”  I said “Yes, I know that, obviously you don’t realize that Gynecomasita means I have Breasts”, she patched me over to her manager.  I repeated what I told the first person and she said “I have seen Gynecomastia on the news just this past week.  Let me get your phone number” I preceded to give it to her and she cut me off midway and hung up.  I called up their Customer Support line about this and they apologized and are giving me a free $25 gift card for the insulting experience.

The third one welcomed me with open arms and said I could come any time of the day.

I called Soma and got the same response as the third VS store which made me happy.

I got the fitting this past Saturday.  It was the most nerve racking experience I have ever gone though.  It sucked having a person measure me and start bringing bras for me to try on.  I learned that I am a 36C or 38B depending on the manufacture.  I did buy a few new bras that fit so much better than the ones I guessed at.  It is like these bras were made just for me.  So comfortable!

After all of this I still recommend getting a fitting performed, however prepare yourself.  I almost passed out at the store but it was worth it in the end.  It makes you realize that you need a bra when a complete stranger measures you and says "you’re a 36C."  I really didn't think I was that big.

[Alchemist]

I'm sure my partner would take me bra shopping and probably get a kick out of it.  She doesn't like bras but wears them for comfort.  I have them.  All in all I would rather not have them and haven't fetishized them. I would be an Alchemical priest with or without them, they just push costuming in a particular direction.  They caused me a decade of misery.  Now, as a nudist, they are just part of the landscape and occasionally part of the costuming at nudist costume parties and we can all laugh.  I get plenty of hugs from the ladies so they are no problem at all.  Men are more afraid, as if it was contagious.