What Does "Acceptance" Mean to You?

[Johndoe1]

To me, acceptance is in two pieces, and is based on my coming to terms with my gynecomastia and what I have observed with fellow gynecomastia sufferers.

Personal Acceptance - Whether you developed due to pubescent hormone imbalance or due to medication, there is always a time period, even if only for a very short time, when there is no acceptance at all due to the conditioning we all have had. Men are masculine and women are feminine and and the two shall never cross and now you have a very feminine trait that defines the very essence of femininity, breasts, on your chest. We are told "men don't cry", "men are rough and tough", "men don't wimp out", etc. But there are these two Mammalian Protuberances prominently on display and that doesn't reconcile with our upbringing. There eventually comes a point when you have to at least acknowledge them to decide what the next move is. Reduction or acceptance. For those of us who frequent here, for various legitimate reasons, we have chosen to accept them. Some do not have a choice but to accept them due to the medication or health reasons they have developed in the first place. That acceptance ranges from do nothing to wearing support full time depending on the individuals needs.

Societal Acceptance -Society in general does not look favorably on men who have breasts. This adds stress to an already stressful situation. In my own case, I have come to the conclusion that if universal acceptance of my chest means I would have to submit to the silly taboos women must deal with their breasts, I would be willing to do so. That is better than having to go around hiding my chest as if I am the one in the wrong, when clearly it is society that has the hang up with boobs on guys, not me. Until we can get society as a whole to at least acknowledge having gynecomastia does not make you a freak or monster or whatever, we will continue to be outcasts.

Even women in general have no idea what gynecomastia is. I was called a trolling perv by a woman in another forum because there was no way a guy could have naturally occurring 38DD/36DDD breasts. I then spent the next hour or more explaining it was completely possible and there were men with larger breasts than mine and how it was possible. In the end, she admitted she had no idea this was even possible and finally apologized. I truly believe it is the lack of education is the root of this problem, but that is a very long term solution.

These are just my opinions from observation and what I have personally experienced. Your mileage will definitely vary.

[JohannK]

Interesting read.  I don't think there's much for me to add.

And yes, that conflict between accepting your breasts and "being a man" is very real.

[hammer]

Johndoe1 said a lot that I would think he speaks for many of us. I for one having breast enlargement for as long as I can remember,  has put me though some ups and downs but primarily in my later years as I was very lucky that I never let it bother me in my earlier years.

Being on the forum now for a long time I've told and heard a lot of stories and I sure hope that I have helped a few out along the way too, but I'm thinking that it is getting to be time that old hammer closes this chapter in his life, and just focus on his grandchildren, as they are keeping me very busy lately and to be Frank with you all, I have really, and I really mean totally come to a point in my life that I dont give a rats ass about these damn mounds on my chest no matter how big or inconvenient they may be sometimes!  Ya, sometime I have to bundle them up in a bra, I usually dont, but there is a need to at times so I do, and so what.

So gentlemen,  I  will be thinking about this and I  might be deleting my account in the near future so if i   do, I want you to know that it has been a great pleasure to get to know you and I ask that you keep up the good fight!

Bob

[Goodnplenty]

I think that if you can accept yourself and your body the way it is then most of the battle is over.   One thing I've learned over the years and it may sound  cliche but attitude is everything.  If you spend all your time ripping on yourself, telling yourself that you're somehow defective or less than because your body is shaped a little differently then you don't have to worry about society beating you down and defeating you because you've already done it.  Men and women exist on a spectrum.  As men though our expected point  on the spectrum is more fixed than women's.   Women have a lot more flexibility and are granted more forgiveness when they deviate.  For those of us who accept and even embrace our new found features we are not given the leniency that women enjoy and expect. 

[island dude]

Hammer if and when you decide to close out, then know you will be missed. Always found your posts to be honest and sincere. Enjoy the family, and Gods Speed.

[hammer]

Hammer if and when you decide to close out, then know you will be missed. Always found your posts to be honest and sincere. Enjoy the family, and Gods Speed.

Thank you very much. 

[Johndoe1]

Bob, 
Would hate to see you leave but I get it. I too want to get to a point where I can say F you to the world about my girls. Being here has definitely helped me get so much closer to that day. 

[hammer]

Bob,
Would hate to see you leave but I get it. I too want to get to a point where I can say F you to the world about my girls. Being here has definitely helped me get so much closer to that day.

Thanks, I'm good on QRZ if you ever are ready to connect on HF. As we used to say in the Navy, you leave the ship at the ship and the beach on the beach, so you need not worry about the subject matter of the forum being talked about. If you need my QRZ info, let me know. 

Bob

[Catmando]

Good bye, hammer.

Good luck as you go forward and no longer on this site.

Side set, I think you are the type of person that hammer might have been tired of and decided to leave this forum! You should try to find a life and have less warship in the man breast!

[Catmando]

Good bye, hammer.

Good luck as you go forward and no longer on this site.

Side set, I think you are the type of person that hammer might have been tired of and decided to leave this forum! You should try to find a life and have less warship in the man breast!

Cat I was going to just move on and let this go, but I will not!
You have done nothing but insult the members here. I  can't figure out why you want to be here with us "freaks" except to  insult folks that have done nothing to you. I have a dislike for bullies and you sir are nothing more than a bully! I will not be bullied, not ever! No one want to come into a forum with such childish behavior,  I  know I don't. But I will not be run off by your rudeness.

Perhaps it is someone like YOU that drive people away.

Charlie, I sure do hope that you feel much better now that you have that off your chest. I am the farthest thing from a Bullie, in fact I was the guy that used to be the protector of the bullied.

I'm glad we were able to have this talk, I hope you feel as good about it as I do. Thanks for this chance to talk.

[Catmando]

Good bye, hammer.

Good luck as you go forward and no longer on this site.

Side set, I think you are the type of person that hammer might have been tired of and decided to leave this forum! You should try to find a life and have less warship in the man breast!

Cat I was going to just move on and let this go, but I will not!
You have done nothing but insult the members here. I  can't figure out why you want to be here with us "freaks" except to  insult folks that have done nothing to you. I have a dislike for bullies and you sir are nothing more than a bully! I will not be bullied, not ever! No one want to come into a forum with such childish behavior,  I  know I don't. But I will not be run off by your rudeness.

Perhaps it is someone like YOU that drive people away.

Charlie, I sure do hope that you feel much better now that you have that off your chest. I am the farthest thing from a Bullie, in fact I was the guy that used to be the protector of the bullied.

I'm glad we were able to have this talk, I hope you feel as good about it as I do. Thanks for this chance to talk.

Cat, we haven't had a discussion son. I can tell from your previous post and especially this one that you are quite the narcissist. You and I have nothing to ever talk about so this is the last time I will acknowledge Your Existence in this forum or on this planet! Because life is too short to deal with assholes.

I'm sure your not old enough to be my dad as I've been retired for many years, over 20 actually, and I'm so sorry for hitting a nerve as I have that I brought you to the point of name calling. Fact is I've been here much longer then you can imagine,  lve just been an active reader.

[JohannK]

Catmando, the majority of your posts have either been on the agressive side, or contradictory.  And in those cases you refused to admit to contradicting yourself.  So it's only natural that people would take offense.

[rebcho]

Acceptance seems to be a day to day battle for me. Today, I'm feeling rather insecure about my breasts. I hide them in uncomfortable compression shirts and am shy about showing around anyone, even family. I don't know how much they know about the extent of my "condition". Privately, I enjoy having them. I like how they look. I like how they feel. I guess I'm still struggling with acceptance. I'm not a freak, right?

[Goodnplenty]

You're not the only one here that likes the look and feel of their breasts and actually enjoys them.  Society conditions men to be ashamed of ourselves if we are not 100% on the masculine end of the spectrum.  
Whereas women have the freedom to feminine, masculine or anywhere in between with no repercussions. 

[Catmando]

Catmando, the majority of your posts have either been on the agressive side, or contradictory.  And in those cases you refused to admit to contradicting yourself.  So it's only natural that people would take offense.

I apologize,  it may be that I had a very bad day on one day and a good day on the next. I'm a person that lives with a ton of chronic pain.