My Breasts

[aboywithgirls]

Honestly, I would have benefitted from wearing a bra probably at age 11 or 12.  As you know, that was not an acceptable option for a boy that age in the early 80's.  While it would have been embarrassing, I would have been more comfortable.  Some of the girls in my classes at that age would tell me that I should wear a bra.  Believe me, they were big enough for one.  Just happy with my decision to wear one now.

Actually, I had my first bra talk with my mother when I was12. She gave me a stack of hand me downbras frommy olderr sister. She had me try them on and said I could wear them around the house if it helped me. I did this for a few years butwhen I turned 16, I had gotten large enough that she had a second bra talk with me and said that I really needed to start wearing a bra full time. I told her thatn would but, I wanted my ownn bras. I was fitted at JCPENNEY that same day and I was a 34C.

[42CSurprise!]

This conversation is like a walk down memory lane... or should I say mammary lane.  Couldn't resist.  My breast development was minimal though it was enough that I felt shame about it.  It affected all kinds of choices I made because I didn't want to expose my chest.  When I did, I felt embarrassment even if no one said anything.  There were still stares but it was more my mind that knew I was different just from looking at my friends with flat chests.  I've spoken about this before.  What greatly complicated the presence of small breasts on my chest when I was an adolescent was the fact I started putting on women's lingerie including brassieres when I was 12 years old.  I didn't understand what that was about until decades later when I encountered memories of sexual abuse when I was a young boy.  From age 12 to 15 I broke into homes to steal lingerie.  You can imagine the confusion about all of that as I got older.  I won't go into that story but I will say that finding this website and giving myself permission to put on a brassiere has been part of my healing around that trauma.  And that is one of the reasons I keep saying that wearing a brassiere for me is not simply to deal with back problems or sensitive nipples.  It has a sexual element to it and I'm learning to accept the whole dynamic... me having breasts that benefit from wearing a brassiere; putting on a brassiere and feeling aroused; talking about crossdressing here and elsewhere.  I have this particular hormone stew that led to this body and life experience of sexual trauma that complicated the whole journey... gender confusion and sexual orientation confusion.  I've landed at a place where I know I'm heteorsexual and not on my way to transitioning to become a woman.  I'm simply a man with breasts who lives alone and sometimes puts on a brassiere while enjoying those breasts.  Go figure... so many ways to live a life and this is one of them.

[curiousk]

Honestly, I would have benefitted from wearing a bra probably at age 11 or 12.  As you know, that was not an acceptable option for a boy that age in the early 80's.  While it would have been embarrassing, I would have been more comfortable.  Some of the girls in my classes at that age would tell me that I should wear a bra.  Believe me, they were big enough for one.  Just happy with my decision to wear one now.

Actually, I had my first bra talk with my mother when I was12. She gave me a stack of hand me downbras frommy olderr sister. She had me try them on and said I could wear them around the house if it helped me. I did this for a few years butwhen I turned 16, I had gotten large enough that she had a second bra talk with me and said that I really needed to start wearing a bra full time. I told her thatn would but, I wanted my ownn bras. I was fitted at JCPENNEY that same day and I was a 34C.

If my mom did that, gave me hand me down bras from older sisters to try on, I would have tried them to see if they fit and helped the bouncing.  I think it would have felt like the right thing for me to do.  Unfortunately, there was never a discussion between myself and the females in my family about the breast development I had.  If my mom suggested a bra for me, I probably would have worn one.  While embarrassing, it would have controlled the movement, helped my appearance and possibly give me some confidence.  I already had some, not a lot, of  the boys and girls in my classes saying I needed to wear a bra.  I sure could have used one as early as 11 years old.

[blad]

As I have stated in other posts before, I could have benefited from a bra talk from my mom. She was well aware of my breast development, having taken me to specialists to be assessed. I think we were both a bit too embarrassed to open a discussion; sort of don't ask and don't tell. 

Openly wearing a bra to school would have been a dramatic paradigm shift, but on the other hand I was constantly told every day in school I needed a bra so it was not like it was a secret. My breasts were often on full display on the skins teem during physical education. 

When I began trying bras in private, I found a strange acceptance and even enjoyed how my breasts looked in a bra. I was mentally ready to wear a bra full time as a teen ager if society was ready as well. Strange how the bra turned a negative into a positive, if only I could have taken full advantage of that right from my teen years.

[Evolver]

Openly wearing a bra to school would have been a dramatic paradigm shift, but on the other hand I was constantly told every day in school I needed a bra so it was not like it was a secret. My breasts were often on full display on the skins teem during physical education.

From what I've read elsewhere on the forum I don't think you are the only one to have been forcibly forced to flaunt yourself on the skins team. It was never a problem for me, I was a normal teenager I guess, but I just wonder - and this applies to anyone - if you were on the skins team but still wore a bra, would the teasing and bullying have been worse?

[Johndoe1]

if you were on the skins team but still wore a bra, would the teasing and bullying have been worse?

Oh. Hell. Yes.

[Traveler]

^^^^^^^
I double that above, it was bad enough to be forced on the skins team by a sadistic male coach. A female gym teacher probably wouldn’t have, but back then it was only males for the boy’s and females for the girls.

[curiousk]

I was very lucky that my gym teacher, also my wrestling coach and a great mentor, never put me in those embarrassing situations.  If we were standing in line for shirts and skins, you could see him counting to make sure that I was always a shirt and never a skin.  He never talked about it, but he never put me in that position.  I'm thankful for that.  Honestly, being a shirt with bouncing boobs was hard enough.  I'm glad that I wear bras everyday and I'm way more comfortable that way.

[blad]

Openly wearing a bra to school would have been a dramatic paradigm shift, but on the other hand I was constantly told every day in school I needed a bra so it was not like it was a secret. My breasts were often on full display on the skins teem during physical education.

From what I've read elsewhere on the forum I don't think you are the only one to have been forcibly forced to flaunt yourself on the skins team. It was never a problem for me, I was a normal teenager I guess, but I just wonder - and this applies to anyone - if you were on the skins team but still wore a bra, would the teasing and bullying have been worse?

Most likely any consideration of wearing a bra to school would have required some sort of exemption from gym classes. Besides being on a skins teem with a bra on, simply changing into gym cloths in a bra would not likely work well. (Even though the entire class was accustom to seeing my bare breasts every time I changed or was on the skins teem). A bra would likely be visible through the required gym shirt in our classes as well. 

With irony, I remember being on the skins teem in a mixed gym event, where the few girls who were also on the "skins" teem were obviously keeping there gym shirt on. And yes, I was yet again called out for needing a bra.

In some ways, wearing a bra to school under the right cloths would feel more safe than exposing breasts in gym. It may not even be obvious right away if one was wearing a bra given that everyone already was aware of my breasts. 

No easy solution; even if you accept your breasts and the comfort of wearing a bra, it is not easy to fit in particularly as a teen.

[Dale Warnio]

I agree with blad. There were times I really wanted to wear a bra to school. Part of me thought they  already know I have breasts, have repeatedly said I need to wear a bra, so what would be the big deal of them knowing I now wear a bra? Same with PE,  they all have seen me be bare breasted in the showers and on the skins team, so what’s the big deal of them seeing me in a bra? 

 But, I also knew that wearing a bra would make the teasing even worse. Instead of being satisfied that they were right that I needed to wear a bra and pleased that I had listen to them and come to agree with them buy regular wearing a bra,  I knew I would get more torture in scorn. 

 Very interesting double standard that blad had to go topless  while his female skins teammates did not.  Did those girls say anything? Did you notice them paying particular attention to your naked breasts are talking to each other about them?  

[blad]

Very interesting double standard that blad had to go topless  while his female skins teammates did not.  Did those girls say anything? Did you notice them paying particular attention to your naked breasts are talking to each other about them? 

That gym session memory has stayed with me clearly. It was mortifying to have exposed bouncing breasts in front the of girls in the mixed class. I recall it was a basketball game with lots of jumping and running. In close contact some of the girls were suggesting they should share a bra with me while guys would just call out across the court that I needed a bra. 

I would try to act engaged in the game like everything was normal, while everyone was staring at my boobs. They were probably all mesmerized as they bounced around just like a girls breasts. Who could blame them really. 

[Dale Warnio]

Yes, who could blame them. Probably the first time the girls had seen bare breasts in public bouncing freely during an athletic activity.  They probably couldn’t help but compare their breasts to yours and think about how they would feel if it were them putting on the show for everyone. 

Of course, the other irony is that both the girls and the boys were right that you should’ve been wearing a bra just like all the other girls in your PE class. 

 Naturally, you would try to look like you’re absorbed in the game, but I’m sure you were more aware of your breasts bouncing and everybody staring at them.   

[Evolver]

Yes, who could blame them. Probably the first time the girls had seen bare breasts in public bouncing freely during an athletic activity.  They probably couldn’t help but compare their breasts to yours and think about how they would feel if it were them putting on the show for everyone.

I could easily imagine that to be the case, even if I was never put in that exact situation. Dale, you have a way with words.

Life is full of unfair comparisons. I cannot wait until the day that people are not judged according to their physical attributes, or race, or sexual orientation, or politics, or religion, or how they present themselves, or career, etc. etc. People are people!

[SideSet]

I was just thinking back to when I was a teenager developing breasts, and all the many kids, and even a number of adults, who told me I needed to wear a bra. 

I heard it so much, how could I not think of starting to wear a bra. I paid close attention to what I could see through the tops of the bras all the girls in my class were wearing. I tried to compare the size of their breasts to mine and imagine how I would feel and look in a bra.  Each day when the newspaper came, I searched out and then studied all the advertising that included bras.  I spent hours looking at bras in the Sears, Penney’s, Spiegels, and Ward’s catalogs. 

Everyone in the ads always looked so happy in their bras. The bras looked so good on them. 

Several times I had overheard girls in my class talking to each other about their bras, how excited they had been when they first started needing to wear a bra, moving up a cup size, what styles they liked, how a boy sitting behind one had traced the outline of her bra band on her back. I replayed those conversations over and over in my head. 

I loved just hearing them say the word bra. And some of them were the very same girls who had told me I needed to wear a bra.  I knew they were right. I wanted to be part of that group talking about our bras. 

[blad]

Yes SideSet, once I gave in to all the comments from the girls that I needed a bra and tried one in my early teen years, I too wished I could have participated in conversations with them about bras. 

I think when you develop breasts at the same time as the girls did in school, you have a bit of a connection to the "bra culture" but obviously always feel like an outsider. The whole thing becomes a confusing curiosity; you did not want breasts but you do, you resist comments that you need a bra and are embarrassed but realize how well a bra fits, you know its strange to need and wear a bra yet find it a bit fascinating to wear one, the comments that you need a bra are made as ridicule yet you realize inside that they are right, you hate having breasts yet take note that you look and feel good wearing a bra, you want to find out more about wearing a bra and trying different ones but are limited in your access.

In the end, it is not so much that you mind having breasts or wearing a bra but that you feel your situation must be hidden as much as possible and that you can not just be you.