Author Topic: My eyes are up here  (Read 3195 times)

Offline Traveler

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Had a bit of a weird experience the other day. I was out getting propane at the local feed store and the guy filling the tank couldn’t stop staring at my chest! It was chilly out and I had a lined, moulded T shirt bra on with a layering tank, heavy tee shirt and a hoodie with designs on it. Pretty stealth actually, I go out all the time like that and don’t get a second glance. It hides my 40DD’s well, but if you really look you can see the mounds. This guy started filling the tank and glanced at my chest and locks on. At first I think he’s reading the writing on my hoodie. Either he was a really slow reader, or as I think, he was staring at my boobs!

Before my acceptance I would have either been embarrassed or just locked down my brain. This time I had the fleeting thought of “my eyes are up here” and “women have to deal with this all the time”. I’m definitely in a better place but what a long strange trip it’s been.

Offline Johndoe1

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Those things will happen occasionally. One time I did say, "My eyes are up here", it was a woman, and it startled her so bad she turned beet red! She knew EXACTLY what she had done and knows what it feels like to be objectified and she was horrified. She walked away very quickly. I secretly loved it!
Womanhood is not defined by breasts, and breasts are not indicative of womanhood. - Melissa Fabello

Offline FredL

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I've had that a lot. Sometimes I can tell when it's going to happen. Like in the summer when I'm in an oversized black t-shirt. As the person approaches I maintain eye contact to try and head it off. It probably backfires. They're thinking - Why is the guy with the boobs looking at me that way? Just want to get a better look at what he's packing up there! 

Well-endowed women deal with it all the time. But they like it because it's a reminder of how womanly they are. For a man it's no fun unless he's a bodybuilder.

Offline Traveler

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Well-endowed women deal with it all the time. But they like it because it's a reminder of how womanly they are. For a man it's no fun unless he's a bodybuilder.
Actually, before acceptance I’d have been right there with you. My journey of acceptance means I’ve come to not just accept but have learned to love myself as I am. I wear a bra daily and have become quite comfortable finally supporting my girls. If other people stare or have a judgement about it, then that’s their problem.
im not out and about wearing blouses or a tight fitting sweater. By the same token I’m not going to wear compression shirts or a binder.
I’ve come to liking my breasts quite a bit and want them to look their best.

p.r.1974

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I have had my fair share of looks. Most of the time it is women who notice and give the knowing smile. On occasion it is a small minded dude that decides to keep his trap shut when he sees a 6'4 dude with boobs. 

For those that have them and don't want them, get rid of them. Just leave those who have decided to accept them be.

Offline curiousk

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I've had it happen from time to time with women.  Usually if they are straight in front of me, you can see the mounds a bit to get there attention.   When I turn to the side so that the projection is there, then the eyes really begin to focus more.  I don't mind it if that happens.   I look at it a compliment and move on.  I've been wearing a bra for a little over a year and I just don't care.   People look because I have breasts, not because I'm wearing a bra.  If people see the outline of my straps or bra, so be it.  

Offline mgr

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I have caught a number of women staring at my chest, but never has anyone but an sales associate during a fitting ever commented.  Some are stares, some quick glances with a look away when I turn.  Not sure what to think, but I go about my business. I don't flaunt them and try to wear shirts that conceal them. I wear printed shirts mostly, but never baggy ones. They have to fit the shoulders on my or I feel they are just way to big and it would look worse.

White tee shirts are a thing of the past for sure...  

Offline Traveler

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White tee shirts are a thing of the past for sure... 
Hehehe... and have been for at least for 40 years for me. As they have gotten bigger I’ve learned to conceal even more. 

Offline Johndoe1

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While I don't "conceal", I don't "flaunt" either. If I show, I show. I try to wear what looks good on me and sometimes the girls have moment.

Offline Dale Warnio

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mgr, what did the SA say?

Offline mgr

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Dale,
Over the years, two have asked how long I have been on Estrogen.  One asked if I had implants.  Once I explained to them my hormones were out of balance for medical reasons, they sort of were shocked.  None of the Soma SA's have ever made such a comment.  They only comment on how the bra fits and if it looks good on me.  It is interesting to hear their thoughts because when I don't like they way it looks, they are typically of the same opinion before I even give my opinion.  I will try it on and they walk in the fitting room and say "No, that does not look good on you at all".  One time I tried one on that I really liked and when the SA stepped in to see how it fit, she immediately got a smile on her face and said "Oh, that fits you so well and it looks good too!". It made me feel good.

I have had 5 mammograms over the years and have another scheduled for March. Only once did I get a cold reception from a tech and she asked how long I had been on hormones. She was a bit older and my impression (right or wrong) was that she may have not been open minded to people transitioning even though I wasn't.  All the others have been very nice and understanding.

MGR

Offline Dale Warnio

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MGR,

Thank you for that helpful response. How did you feel when their reactions  assumed you were on HRT or had implants? 

It seems like the Soma SAs  treat you like any other customer, but may be a little nicer. They know you want the same things from your bras that all their women customers want, but that things are a little more complicated for you, so they go out of their way a little bit more. Do you think I’m right? And how does that feel?

aboywithgirls

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I totally understand the reaction from SAs who simply assume how we acquired our assets.

I have been asked if my breast forms were the ones I wished to be fitted for. I've been asked how long I have been transitioning. When I was sixteen, at my first bra fitting, the SA assumed that it was female. I was a 34C.

I took it as a great compliment when a couple years ago for Halloween, I went en femme. I was wearing a low cut LBD with a plunge push up bra which generated a ton of cleavage. When the waitress came by to take our drink order, she obviously thought I was a woman because when I spoke, I totally surprised her. She stared at my boobs all night. She kept on asking my girls if they would like another sex on the beach! Finally I told her that my eyes are up here!

Offline Traveler

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I haven’t had any guys say anything yet. It is usually the women that seem to catch on and I find the various reactions amusing, from big smiles to the squint with the confused face since, except for the boobs, I look pretty masculine.

Offline mgr

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MGR,

Thank you for that helpful response. How did you feel when their reactions  assumed you were on HRT or had implants?

It seems like the Soma SAs  treat you like any other customer, but may be a little nicer. They know you want the same things from your bras that all their women customers want, but that things are a little more complicated for you, so they go out of their way a little bit more. Do you think I’m right? And how does that feel?
Dale,
I was not offended, but maybe actually pleased about the comments because it confirmed I needed to be there to be fit for a bra. Most of those were in my early fittings and I was very nervous about being there.  It justified the fitting in my mind.

I agree with the Soma SA's comment.  They have explained some of the difficulties of fitting men with breasts .... just because of the width of their chests.  It is always nice to be complemented on anything. I have to admit I like it when I am complemented on my chest because I want to look nice and not like a guy trying to pass as a female.  If I am going to have them, then I want to wear them with confidence and they should look the part, if you know what I mean?   Sure, the SA's are mostly complementing me to make me feel comfortable in the situation and certainly appreciate their effort.

However, I think some of their expressions are completely genuine when they find a bra that fits me and looks nice.  It is a comforting experience in more ways than one.

 

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