The estrogen path

[Brdy64]

Upfront,
I am lucky that I have several people that I can speak frankly with over any subject (outside of this forum) without fear of ridicule. Unfortunately only one of them is a 'buddy'. 
Strange that the same estrogen that caused our 'curves', also makes our female friends and family so caring and understanding. It's like the hormones are on opposite ends of the 'kindness' spectrum when it comes to things like that. 

My buddies at the center will and have responded rather harshly when I talk about gyno. Maybe not really on purpose, it's just that Alpha-male thing the hormones are driving. 
Conversations about their questions just need to be addressed by simply stating, "I'm seeing my doctor about it". 
Of course the occasional rude comments will always be present, and to be taken with a grain of salt. 

It's just so refreshing to know that we have some people that can actually be trusted with delicate conversation. 😉

[Brdy64]

Agreed Birdie, even my closest guy friends who are kind and open minded would never understand why I’m in a bra. 

In my case it's impossible to hide 🤣
I guess that's why I chose not trying to hide it anymore. 
One groping and many rude remarks followed my dumping 'bib overalls', but the rude comments have slowed down. 

Now they say things like: "why don't you try and do something about it", or "yours are as big as hers", and "can I see if you have cleavage". 
That last remark really pissed me off. 😳

Best to just avoid the conversation with them. 

[aboywithgirls]

It was after I had a thyroidectomy in 2012 that my estrogen/progesterone (which was already dominant) started increasing. This coincided with thoughts of transitioning. I had always felt that I was a woman, but I could still manage presenting male. I finally got to the point where I did not want anything to do with being or presenting male.

I know that you all know the eventual outcome. I have never been happier. At no time did I EVER even WANT to consider testosterone replacement therapy. Was it that I was hard wired with a woman's brain or was it the hormones. TBH, I don't care. I am happy and very content with my womanhood. 

❤️Sophie❤️

[Brdy64]

That's awesome Sophie!
I'm somewhere on the rainbow spectrum 🤔
Definitely male, but not anywhere near the Alpha-male end.
I was laughing this morning with the CNA as she commented on my choice in the women's clothes I have been buying as "dike attire" (her words, not mine).
I asked her, "Is that what I look like?"
She got embarrassed 🤣🤣

I'm happy going out in a noticeable bra. Today I am in a pastel shirt and my white bra is very noticeable.
Hair is growing out longer and longer. Another patient getting on the bus just asked, "when you going to cut that hair off?" 🤣
I have boobs, so I need a bra. I have curves, so I need women's clothes. I will just be me. 😍
If someone has a problem with it, it's their problem not mine. 🤔

[Brdy64]

Yeah Dude,
I'm very happy being a guy, and I was in that trap of "find out why and fix it" mentality for years. 
I wasn't happy being there. 

Accepting the condition complete with the emotional aspects and tendencies is key to finding my 'zone' so to speak. 

I still enjoy a good game of pool, but designing clothes is just as rewarding for me. I'll tear up over simple things. Oh well, just means 'I'm sensitive'.

The hormonal stew can either be a blessing or a curse, depending on perspective. 😉

[Brdy64]

My new water bottle I ordered, I have yet to use it. 🙄
I like the DD owl with boobs for eyes. 🤣

(Saggy baggy boob club water bottle)

Photo below:

[Orb]

People do and say the dumbest things.  Emotions do take over the moment quicker now.  I hope you can brush things off and carry on.  Not saying others are right but if the moment doesn't allow you to tell them they are out of line then we just have to compose ourselves and carry on. Have a good afternoon and weekend.

[Brdy64]

I can't count how many times I excused myself to the restroom just to cry. Seems the hormonal stew likes to make us respond to things like that. 🤔
Stupid stuff that barely deserves our attention just rubs us wrong. 

It's all good, heck I have even cried because the bag wouldn't come out of my vacuum cleaner. 😳

Just be glad you have feelings. There are so many people walking about that have all the feelings of a brick wall. Basically dead to the world. 😉

[aboywithgirls]

I soooooo understand 😭. I did a decent job for a while, pretending to be a man. However I found that after my thyroidectomy, I was becoming much more emotional. I used to get my emotions on a 0-5 scale. Now, I am at a 0-20 scale! That is mostly the happy or sad emotions. I find that I seldom get very angry anymore. I, personally like my emotions now. I like how I can feel things. Life is better, even though the tears 😢. 

❤️Sophie ❤️

[Brdy64]

I soooooo understand 😭. I did a decent job for a while, pretending to be a man. However I found that after my thyroidectomy, I was becoming much more emotional. I used to get my emotions on a 0-5 scale. Now, I am at a 0-20 scale! That is mostly the happy or sad emotions. I find that I seldom get very angry anymore. I, personally like my emotions now. I like how I can feel things. Life is better, even though the tears 😢.

❤️Sophie ❤️

I get the emotional thing. Mine are off the charts as well.
I always was more emotional than my peers seemed to be. I noticed that a lot throughout my life. I just assumed I was weird, I didn't associate it with the 'hormonal stew'. 
I would visit my friends, but spend more time talking with the ladies. Conversation there was just a better fit. 🤔

This last year has seen my emotional difference on 'steroids', so to speak. And changes are happening faster than I could have ever of thought..

Self doubt about my own gender creeped up on me again. Something I hadn't thought about since my teens. 

I'm not the typical male, nor am I female. I find myself somewhere in between, and I'm happy to be here! All the emotions, bras, clothes, and everything to match. 😍😍

[Brdy64]

I soooooo understand 😭. I did a decent job for a while, pretending to be a man. However I found that after my thyroidectomy, I was becoming much more emotional. I used to get my emotions on a 0-5 scale. Now, I am at a 0-20 scale! That is mostly the happy or sad emotions. I find that I seldom get very angry anymore. I, personally like my emotions now. I like how I can feel things. Life is better, even though the tears 😢.

❤️Sophie ❤️

I get the emotional thing. Mine are off the charts as well.
I always was more emotional than my peers seemed to be. I noticed that a lot throughout my life. I just assumed I was weird, I didn't associate it with the 'hormonal stew'.
I would visit my friends, but spend more time talking with the ladies. Conversation there was just a better fit. 🤔

This last year has seen my emotional difference on 'steroids', so to speak. And changes are happening faster than I could have ever of thought..

Self doubt about my own gender creeped up on me again. Something I hadn't thought about since my teens.

I'm not the typical male, nor am I female. I find myself somewhere in between, and I'm happy to be here! All the emotions, bras, clothes, and everything to match. 😍😍

I completely understand Birdie, I have always been the same way.  I really am a hybrid a little bit of both male and female.  It is just who I am and always have been. But truth is I like me and wouldn't want to be any other way.
Just me, Charli

We were made this way, nothing wrong with it. 😉👍

[Brdy64]

Little by little staff at the day center is switching to calling me 'Birdie', the nurse did correct me and say that the spelling is a girls name and should be 'Birdy' instead.
I'm liking my new name. 😍

Things have been changing quite a bit, and the name 'Birdie' just really fits. 😉

(Even if it is short for the name Elizabeth 🙄)

[HeldUp]

I don’t think I’ll be using this online handle as a nickname socially just yet.

Is this a relatively new social appellation? Or have you been going by it or something similar publicly for a while now?

[Brdy64]

I don’t think I’ll be using this online handle as a nickname socially just yet.

Is this a relatively new social appellation? Or have you been going by it or something similar publicly for a while now?

Very recent!
Here on the forum the nickname was created, and I like it. 😍

It does resemble my email address somewhat, and that has been used for decades. 🤔
But not as a nickname. 😉

[Brdy64]

I don’t think I’ll be using this online handle as a nickname socially just yet.

Is this a relatively new social appellation? Or have you been going by it or something similar publicly for a while now?

Very recent!
Here on the forum the nickname was created, and I like it. 😍

It does resemble my email address somewhat, and that has been used for decades. 🤔
But not as a nickname. 😉

I guess in High school I was 'Birdman' as well as a few other 'not so nice' variations. 😳