Acceptance by your spouse

[BAB]

First time poster here. Was diagnosed with gyno 2 months ago. My boobs are growing and sore. The nipples have gotten twice as large. I am a 40B size, but my wife feels strongly that wearing a bra is cross-dressing and not needed. She has ordered some gyneomastia shirts for me to try.  How do I convince her that bras are a good idea? She has gone to all the medical sites that only talk drugs and surgery, "Not one talks about clothing or bras". Are there any medical sites that discuss clothing options?

[Dudewithboobs]

Good morning, welcome to the forum and kudos on accepting your breasts as they are and giving them a chance to be supported as they may need. 

A site that I feel is really helpful in providing a great case and argument is 
https://www.thebreastlife.com/blog/advice-for-guys-who-wear-bras/amp/

It’s honestly one of the few places I’d found over the years that was advocating from a woman, who blogs about breast health, and such for women, who changed her view in men who wear bras for this cause and wrote quite well in defense of it. 

Fortunately when I Google just men who wear bras, men with breasts wearing a bra, my husband has breasts and wants to wear a bra, a few other sites populate that seem to be kind and informative to the notions. Hopefully she’d find the same quick oh ok so this is a thing dudes really do wear bras for same reasons women do.  

A bra to a spouse on their man is a tall hurdle to jump and given that it is generally the most feminine item of clothing due to them representing a garment that supports breasts it doesn’t make the case easier. Yes, everyone has breast tissue, yes some men have enlarged breast tissue that may warrant a bra and yes bras are for those with breasts not just those who are women. 
Unfortunately that and other arguments to try and make a woman see the point doesn’t seem to hold water for long.

In the end in my opinion it is a long road of discussions that’s aren’t forced, and giving her time to process the idea. There’s a lot of factors. Her friends, your circle of friends, public outings, etc where your bra may be seen and she having to awkwardly explain why you are wearing one. No minds are alike and as much as you may be uncomfortable she may be embarrassed and that’s ok. It’s a road to walk together and come together on terms of agreement whether it be I don’t want to see it but am ok with it. Let her dictate the type of bras you can wear so she’s comfortable with what you will be wearing, or just a don’t wear it around me and it’s ok. 

[WPW717]

Surprised at first re the breast growth she was. Then the remarks by me of chaffing and bouncing on stairs as they grew. This progressed to the gynecomastia shirts which over time became more of a problem than the boobs hurting. Moved on to sports bras and she was okay with them. With more growth the progression of the breasts are exceeding the sports bra capabilities. Then my attempts to migrate into big girl bras’ was laughable so she set about helping me to get into correct sizes and shapes. This was our (her) progression to  bras. The timeline for this was about a year and the timeline for the breast growth was about 2+ years, it happened quickly.
YMMV as many here have discovered.

[BAB]

Thank  you all for replying. WPW717 she just ordered the gyneomastia compression shirts so some progress,  but why did the shirts become a problem?

[gotgyne]

First time poster here. Was diagnosed with gyno 2 months ago. My boobs are growing and sore. The nipples have gotten twice as large. I am a 40B size, but my wife feels strongly that wearing a bra is cross-dressing and not needed. She has ordered some gyneomastia shirts for me to try.  How do I convince her that bras are a good idea? She has gone to all the medical sites that only talk drugs and surgery, "Not one talks about clothing or bras". Are there any medical sites that discuss clothing options?

Welcome to the forum! Joining us is the first important step.

For many men it is a real problem to convince their spouse that they need a bra. They see it only as a part of female underwear, but not for supporting breasts in men. My wife is one of these women. Although she knows that I wear a bra, she does not like it. I would never dress or undress in front of her for this reason. I can understand her. But on the other side, if she would like to wear male undershirts or boxers I'd have not the slightest problem with it. It's a really complicated matter.

Unfortunately there are no medical sites that recommend wearing bras for men, at least I don't know any in the U.S. In my country Germany, there are some sites, even by doctors, who perform gynecomastia surgery. Look here. Number 2 is translated:

"Support in everyday life: a bra!

Many men with gynecomastia who have not yet decided to have surgery try to make their everyday life easier - and wear a bra. This can be a very good solution, especially when doing sport, to avoid being affected by a sagging breast.
Men just need to be aware that a bra does not necessarily have to be seen as female lingerie. In the truest sense of the word, it is a bust SUPPORTER and therefore provides relief."

Translated with DeepL.com (free version)

https://www.gynaekomastie-koeln.de/fuenf-fakten-zur-gynaekomastie/

[gotgyne]

Thank  you all for replying. WPW717 she just ordered the gyneomastia compression shirts so some progress,  but why did the shirts become a problem?

These shirts compress all of your breast tissue and can conceal gynecomastia very well. But on the long run they are not healthy for this reason. And they do not in the least support (no pun intended!) the acceptance of your breasts by yourself and your wife.

[blad]

At one point my wife looked at me and said that I needed a bra more than she did. It was made in a bit of a sarcastic tone but it opened the door to full time wearing of a bra. Clearly she began to realize my needs.

[WPW717]

Dang things are uncomfortable, hot too. And I run hot 24/7/365.

It was a comedy show for her to watch me struggle to get out of the straight jacket. It always ended with me whining for help to get free.😩

That phase didn’t last too long thankfully.

[Traveler]

Yeah, gynecomastia tees don’t just compress the boobs but the whole torso. I did them for about 6 months, but when summer came around they were the worst. Sweat, chafing and a bit of a rash developed. Pullover sports bras came next. Much better but the uniboob look may not your favorite. They did control the jiggle and hide the nipples though. That was my big problem. Good luck and welcome to the club.

[WonderfullyMade]

When I mentioned to my wife that I wore bras when doing activities such as mowing the yard where it was painful with my breasts bouncing, she just smiled and gave here breasts a little jiggle and said "trust me, I understand" lol. She's a DDD so she would understand. So I guess I've had her support all along even when I was hiding the fact that I was wearing a bra

[Johndoe1]

Accidentally I left a bra rolled up in a top and my wife found it when she went to do laundry. I wash my own bras to show respect that I don't expect her to wash my bras and I don't normally let her see me in just a bra either, though I will wash her bras if I see them in the laundry when I do mine. When I got in from work she nonchalantly stated, I found one of your bras in the laundry. I washed it for you and it's hanging in the bathroom with mine. Before I had a chance to retrieve it, she folded it and set it on the bed for me. First time since I started wearing a bra she has done that. 

[Justagirl💃]

With my wife my breasts were very much liked, but had to be hidden at all costs (God forbid someone think wrongly about her). Bras were therefore Taboo. 

She has been gone for over a decade but we occasionally talk. My stepdaughter informed her that I'm wearing bras and living as a woman. Our last conversation had her asking many questions about current bra size and styles. 

I used to tell her we were living a lesbian relationship 😉

[taxmapper]

My other half knows i wear them and have a larger collection of them. 
I wear pads, she doesn't. (how we keep them separated). 

I could talk at length about being a lesbian couple, but the manhood says otherwise and though she toyed with the idea, intimacy doesn't exist anymore. 

At times i wish i could just drop the man side and just go full female. 

[Gino]

To convince her it's for support suggest to her that is she hurt her back or leg she'd wear a support appliance no? 

[Alfaqv]

My advice would be to give her breasts plenty of attention. She probably feels threatened by your interest in your own breasts and desire to wear a bra. Perhaps you can introduce some  kind of mutual breast play into your sex life. A wear a bra and we manage to see the funny side of it.