Hey! I'm Normal! Are you?

[phantom]

I am truly pleased that you feel so much happier for where you are if you have had male chest reduction performed with medical intervention and now you proclaim to 'be normal at last!'

However,  without trying to P**s on your fire, no one on here can ever define 'normal'.

Despite being a 'c' cup for all my adult life (actually from the age of 8 ) even at this size I could be difined as normal.

For many guys, living with gynaecomastia becomes a way of life.  Not everyone is fortnate to be able to resort to surgery to 'normalise'.  Gynaecomastia is a relatively newly recognised condition where arguably the only pathology is psychological.  Thankfully, forums like this allows men to explore and empathise with this condition.

Very often, guys come on here seeking opinions, such as 'have I got it' etc....blah...blah.... and for some of those guys it's the start of an anxious journey to find some kind of resolution.

Again, I am truly pleased that many of you have found resolution to what, for you, has obviously been a concern to you.  Many, many guys have lived with a similar kind of torment as yourself for many, many, many years.  Despite the varience of definitions of what 'normality' actually is, to catagorise oneself as 'normal' post surgery is to marginalise the rest of us that remain on the other side of the 'acceptable' fence'.

This is not a personal attack on any specific thread and I appologise in advance to any other guys on here that think I am being defensive unduly.  But as I mentioned earlier, sugery is not an option for many guys (usually because of cost, fear or physical contraindications).  Therefore I think it is unreasonable to shout out 'Hey!  I am normal because I have had surgery!'.

Plastic surgery pleases some of the people, much of the time. But not for everyone.  I have opted for elective surgery in the new year.  I am 32 years old and whilst I woud never suggest that my 'bigger than average' breasts has had any more psychological impact than the 'paranoid' flat chested 'nearing mild' case of gynaecomastia, please, please recognise that dealing with gynaecomastia goes beyond the surgeons canular.

This forum has been exceptional in giving me the information I need to explore ALL the options and how to go about finding a good surgeon, if in deed surgery is indicated.  But as someone that *still* has enough breast tissue to make half the female porn industry envious, I know my journey towards resolution is far from over.  I am lucky enough to be in a situation where surgery is both appropriate and (just about) affordable.  This is something I am paying for myself after much deliberation and hard saving.  This is something that will *not* make me happier.  It is something that will make me feel a little less sad.

I hope in a few weeks time I can report back that my journey towards resolution is comming to an end.  What I will never, ever report is that I, at last, feel 'normalised' for opting for surgery.  Choosing to go for male chest reduction is an incredibly personal choice.  It can only be of any real value if it addresses truly personal issues.  It's a sad fact of the 'modern' world that image is what defines who we are and what we are worth to society.  No one want's to admit we are bothered about how we look because of societies expectations, but it's because of how others perceive us that for many of us, it's what makes us feel 'less' than worthy.

All of us are NORMAL.  Male chest reduction does *not* make us more normal.  It can serve to give us a greater sense of self-esteem and confidence and just allow us to get on with our lives.

All this thread serves to do is voice my own perception of the condition that unites us - gynaecomastia.  My opinions are by no means definitive.  I only serve to explore my opinions to compare to your own.  I would welcome the opinions from those of us that are concerned that you might have gynaecomastia, those that have suffered or lived with it for a long time, those that have learned to live with it, those that have had used drug or surgical intervention and imparticuar, any medical professionals that deal with this issue on a daily basis.

Thank you for reading.

[Paa_Paw]

And thank you for writing.

The range of "Normal" is indeed very wide.

Your "C" cup size would put you at or near the end of the range.  But it would not make you abnormal.

I would argue with you a little though. But only If we can do it on friendly terms.

You stated that Gynecomastia is a newly recognised condition.  Actually the term itself is probably 3 thousand years old or more. (It comes from the ancient Greek and pre-dates most medical terms which have Latin roots.) There were portraits of ancient Egyptian Pharaohs who clearly had well formed breasts. Again, this is nothing new.

What is new is the sick and/or perverse view that  we should all conform to some imaginary model or be labeled as odd.  

What else is new is the ability of people to actually make money from this embarassing situation.

I was told that it would go away in a year or so when I was 12 years old.  That was 1949!   It didn't go away.

It is surprising what a person can learn to live with when there is not really any other choice.  Male breast reduction surgery has only been around for about 20 years.  

 

[phantom]

Hello Paa_Paw

Thanks for your reply.  I will gladly argue on friendly terms as I really seek to explore other peoples' view point.

I agree that gynaecomastia has been known about for a very long time.  I guess that like so many other conditions (I refer to gynaecomastia as a 'condition' rather than a disease or illness, because I don't think in itself it has any defined pathology - other than a psychological one) it is stigmatised and grossly misunderstood.

Consequently, sufferers do not - or at least never used to discuss it openly for fear of rejection.

My GP (family doctor), whilst aware of the condition has asked me to keep her informed at every stage of my progress (through surgery) because she knows so little about it and wants to be more informed for 'the inevitable increase' of enquiries.

The small circle of people I have discussed my situation with recently had little or no idea that my chest bothered me so much but then didn't even know it was a condition that was in fact defined by name and effected so many guys.

I think it's only because of a documentary a year ago or so in the UK "Boys with Breasts" that the general public actually became aware of gynaecomastia.  Awareness now seems to have reached a critical mass in the UK.  It's because of that, that I say it is recently recognised.

Regarding your last point about 'learning to live with it when there is no other choice.'  Yes, I had learned to live with my situation.  And all that time it has been miserable.  I am so thankful of this forum for both allowing me to have a real understanding of my condition and that I can do something about it.  Now I live with less sadness and have more hope.

I guess I wrote my initial post feeling somehow marginalised because a couple of times I have seen other post-op guys refer to themselves as 'normal' as if surgery alone has defined them as being an acceptable person.

I hope that makes my points clearer.

Thanks.

[IlluminaZero]

It's good to hear that the UK is increasing awareness about Gynecomastia. I would ask doctors about my breasts and they were either ignorant or unsympathetic, then through personal research I discovered Gynecomastia and had to press the issue to simply discover whether I had it or not. (Most simply said stuff like, "No, guys with Gynecomastia have full blown female breasts" or "just do more push-ups and it will even out.") If the doctors are so apathetic about Gynecomastia in America, there isn't much hope for the rest of present American society.

Personally I feel the entire concept of "normality" is a farce. I want the surgery for a plethora of reasons, but normality isn't one that has crossed my mind... Hell, in the US (where I live) seeing guys with breasts is a somewhat common occurance to be quite honest... I've read that many guys seeking normality upon discovering their Gynecomastia actually gained weight to make the Gynecomastia seem more natural or "normal."

I have no intention of appearing "normal," regardless of what that implies. I would choose my current abnormality then ever consider accepting what people consider normal... I simply wish to absolve a 6+ year long obsession, and be a... Sexier and less self conscious abnormal, that's all.   It would be good to go to the beach and be able to focus on the scantily dressed ladies, and not on whether or not my nipples are sufficiently stimulated.

[cybertit]

Phantom I definately got your point thank you for putting into words what i couldnt.

It's unfortunate but even though many of us with gyno have been able to accept the way we are just fine and have been able to go about our day to day life without thinking we are abnormal in any way... We still are in a way pressured by society(especially in the US) to try to correct our problem so that we can be viewed more as "normal" men.

I am now 28 and have lived with gyno since I was a toddler and had a ruff adolescence because of other kids immaturity...after i somewhat matured around age 19 i learned to just accept the way I was and then told myself that sometime in the future I would try to correct it surgically when i had the $$$ and felt comfortable about putting my body at risk. And even though soon after that i had the means of getting it done i opted for using my money for other MORE IMPORTANT things like (house, cars, gadgets :-)). In the meantime i asked doctors about it and they were all IGNORANT about my condition never really gave me any direction for what i had or just gave me BS advise. I had to find out for myself what i had and how to correct it. Thanks to the internet and this forum I was able to inform myself.

It wasnt until recently that for the same reasons of IlluminaZero i decided to go for it...I just wanna be able to play with my kids in a pool or beach without worrying about other people looking at me..I want to be able to take my shirt off outside on a hot Miami day, I want to meet women and not feel anxxiety when i get into an intimate moment, I just want to be "free" like those other "normal" guys ...etc... I think surgery is a beautiful thing but i think its most important we confront and fix the problem within ourselves first before we look for the knife.

Thanks gyno brothas!