I'm sick and tired of it =/

[TheGoodDevil]

WARNING: LONG, EMOTION-FUELED RANT AHEAD. BASICALLY, I HATE MY MAN BOOBS. But feel free to read it, might make any future posts I do here somewhat more understandable

I think I've had gynecomastia for about 3 years now. I definetly noticed when I was 12, but didn't make too much of it till I was 13. Then it started to take its "psychological toll" that, reading through this forum, seems to affect a lot of people.

I'm not sure if I actually have gyne, I've never had a proper diagnosis, but I feel that I do. No matter how much I work out, the breasts seem to stay there. They aren't gigantic, but they aren't exactly small either. Basically, I don't know if they're just man boobs caused by a lack of exercise (which would be odd, because when I was 12 I was rather athletically active) or if they're caused by gynecomastia.

I hate it. I hate it with a strong fervor. It has changed me for the worse, and this is what makes me hate it. I used to be comfortable with taking my shirt off at the pool or beach, infront of friends, in the locker room. Then once I became self-conscious about it, that all changed. Hell I don't even feel comfortable with my shirt off infront of family or very close friends. I hate wearing tightish clothes, I always wear very baggy t-shirts in the summer and big sweaters/sweatshirts in the winter. I hate taking off my shirt in a locker room. The scars on my upper back from extreme acne+constant popping of said acne doesn't help either, but that's another topic for another day.

I don't like to go swimming, I don't like to go to the beach, I don't like wearing tightish clothes (which sucks because a lot of nice looking shirts and sweaters get passed up by me, simply because of these man bosoms). Not only that, but this has also affected me with my character. I am not as confident and outgoing as I used to be. When I realized that my breasts stayed the same after lots of exercise I began to be less and less active, which in turn makes me feel even more introverted. I hate these god damned pieces of skin+fat+tissue, I hate them =/

I am embarrassed to discuss this with my parents. I don't tell it to my doctor. But I feel like I've had enough. I don't want to live with this for the rest of my life, not for another 20 years, not for another 15. I want them gone ASAP. My acne's pretty much gone, my voice doesn't crack and it's been the same for like 2 years, I've got hair where men usually do (not much on my chest, but on other areas I do), etc. I really don't want to "wait it out" for 3 more years so my hormones balance out if they're out of wack.

I want to be in control of my life again. I try not to be vain, but I do think I have a "nice face" and good clothing sense, and I'm sure I could net some girls if I were more confident. But having these man boobs and as a result not feeling any motivation to exercise to look good for the ladies is ruining what is lauded as "the best years of your life". I'm not on the far end of depression, nor do I feel suicidal at all. If I'm dead, I can't fix this, can't meet nice girls, can't enjoy the things I do enjoy. I'm not "emo" about it or anything, I'm more just pissed off about this.

So yeah. If you read through all that, you're a good person. If you read some of it and predicted it's like most other teens struggling with this condition, then that's fine too. I just wanted to get this off my chest (pun possibly intended =p) and get some feedback from fellow sufferers. Like I said, I want to get more athletic again. I want to have a better body again. I want to feel confident again. I want to enjoy life again. I want to go out with nice girls (not again, as I've never done it before lol). I want to have fun at the pool and at the beach again. I want to control my life again. I'm sick and tired of these god damn breasts that shouldn't even be here, and I want to push them aside like the amalgamation of cells they are.

So a few questions (Yes, "Oh god he's not done yet?!"):

1) Should I wait a few more years until I make a decision on where to go?

2) Should I go see an endocrinologist (sp?)?

3) If I get surgery, will my chest look "normal" (as in, with some exercise afterwards to build muscle there and whatnot, will I look like a kid who works out that doesn't have gyne)??

4) I live in the Washington, DC area. What are good endos and surgeons nearby?

Ultimately I want to feel good about myself again and have a nice body. Nothing uber-ripped like this dude (it's actually almost disgusting):

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/8/8f/Bodybuilder2.jpg

But something a bit more "relaxed" but still healthy, like this:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Soldier_running_in_water.jpg

Cheers everyone, looking forward to some nice replies =)

[headheldhigh01]

welcome to the site.  some more intensely than others, but most of us feel about the same, and i'm somewhere out on your end of the scale. 

1.  some doctors will take you earlier than others; the main concern is whether the hormones are normalizing after puberty so as to minimize or prevent risk of recurrence, bringing us to
2.  it's a good idea, probably more so given your age range, an experienced ps should have opinions too. 
3.  probably yes.  extreme cases are harder to start from, but the improvement is much greater with those anyway.  depending on what you start with, you should expect bruises, scarring, and a lot of fretting  don't worry, final results can take weeks to a year.  in a minority of cases you might have to follow up, so odds favor you, but talk about that with the ps beforehand. 

and yeah i'd be happy with normal too. 

[Paa_Paw]

You will absolutely need to talk to someone who is in a position to be of help. That person may be a parent, grandparent, or a Doctor. A referral to an Endocrinologist is always something that should be seriously considered.

If you are a bit too young for surgery, there are things that can be done to help you cope until surgery is possible.

Meanwhile, stay in touch here. There is at least some comfort just in knowing that you are not alone.

[TheGoodDevil]

Thanks for the replies so far! I do want to see an endo... but I think the most difficult part of this gyne ordeal will be telling my parents "I think I have real man-boobs". Or something like that.

Hopefully luck will play out for me and I can get these gone ASAP.