Hello all,
Heres a few things about me before I get started sharing anything deeper.
Age: 21
Height: 6'6"
Weight: 380lbs
As you can see I'm quite the hefty fellow. I'm just an overall big guy to begin with. Theres also some certain spots that I really dont think should be as big. My chest sticks out allmost as far as my belly does. I have been teased all my life for being tall, overweight, and practically everything else you can think of. I basically dropped out of highschool for those reasons (Among other things, Bad school and all). Yet I have never been teased about "Man-Boobs". Since I dropped out of highschool nobody has teased me, untill recently. Everyone knows me as the big loveable "Teddy Bear". I really wouldnt hurt a fly. That all changed when someone said to me in a theatre, "Hey, are those your airbags incase of a headon wreck!?"
When this guy said this to me, mind you hes probably around 25 years old. I snapped, I went completely ballistic on him. Its like all those years of just "Letting the words roll of my back" all snowballed into one big ball of rage. I got him to the ground and just kept hitting him. Keep in mind i'm probabaly twice his size. It took three of my friends and one of the ticket venders to pull me off of him. I probabaly sat there and hit him for 3 minutes while they were pulling on me. I was pinned down untill the cops arrived, they took me and I spent a night in jail.
The thing is, I'm not worried about the way I look in that self confidence way like most people. If the people around me are cool with the way I look then so am I. I'm more afraid of the people who dont like the way I look. I never had this temper before and I know I'll go crazy again if someone taunts me. I'm going to a once a week anger managment classes allready. My bloodpressure has also gone from around 140/70 to 170/80.
This kind of thing scares me, because people in the world are cruel. Yet I can be the most cruel person of all with my temper. I tried to run from this sort of thing, but I know I cant run forever. There will allways be that one prick that has the balls to say something he shouldnt.
Why is it anyone should be afraid of the way they look. This is how my mindset is, if you dont like me then *Insert Explicit Language Here*. This type of adittude should not exist in my brain. The only person I have ever protected with my fists is my mother. Thats how I want it yet I KNOW it wont be that way.
Since that INCIDENT, I havent even left the house. I felt so ashamed of what I did. My friends have also started calling me "Hulk" for obvious reasons. I dont want that stupid nickname. I
dont want people to be afraid of me.
What I ask of everyone here is some tips, advice, and freindship. To tell you the truth, I dont know if I have gynecomastia, but someone pointing out that I have "Man-Boobs" is enough for me to think I do.
Sorry for the long post,
-Hulk (Hey, It can grow on me)
EDIT: Also wanted to add this picture I found.
I look something to that effect, but I'm a tad bit larger than him in all areas. I'm also much more built than him. Think, fat guy whos got muscle like a linebacker. Like I said before being "Obese" doesnt bother me at all. As a matter of fact I prefer it over being skinny. I may have gynecomastia, or I may just be fat. I only started getting boobs when I gained more weight when I left school, which also made me leave football/basketball.