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[Charlie219]

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[curiousk]

Welcome to the forum.   Do you have the need to support your breasts?   It must be uncomfortable with the movement without my kind of support.

[curiousk]

That’s tough to go that long with mouth wearing a bra when you have a need.  Hopefully you can come up with a solution that would be helpful to you.  

[SideSet]

Yes, you clearly have large breasts.  So good you are wearing a bra when you can.  Must be awkward being bare breasted in the locker room, sorry 

[brock123]

I'd like to think that most men that would shun a fellow man just because of this, especially if they are in the same boat, are just hiding behind some other physical insecurity.  "Macho" is a pretty dumb concept, these dudes think being a man is all about physical traits that women find attractive while completely failing to understand what most women actually find attractive.

I'm sure this is very hard for you. I'm not "there" but I was kind of close to "there" in the past.  I'm still a bit busty, and probably always will be compared to comparable peers, but that's just me.  I store fat in my chest first, lose it last, and it will very likely always be a pain in my particular *ss.

May I ask if you have a female in your life?  My wife was clearly weirded out with what was going on at first, but less than a day later we were shopping at Target for something in the women's section that would make me feel more comfortable.  To this day she still thinks that I like her to play with "them" (note: it does nothing for me) so I kind of think it does something for her   Women are creatures we do not understand, they may surprise you.

A comfortable person is an attractive person.  If you accept this and own it, the people in your life will not blink an eye.  Easier said than done, of course, but this all starts with you!

[SideSet]

Your wife has impressive empathy. Naturally it must’ve felt strange to her to realize her husband was developing breasts like a woman.  However, she quickly realized that just like her, you now also needed something from the women’s section at Target. She knew what made her feel most comfortable and confident about her breasts and wanted that for you, also. 

I am assuming that you are referring to her getting you started wearing bras.  If so, how did that discussion go? Did she measure you for a bra? What bra size? Did she show you different types of bras and tell you what they did and what she thought might work best for you?

I also am impressed with her knowing what gave her pleasure regarding her breasts and then empathizing that you could get the same pleasure and wanting to give you that  Not going to ask any questions about that, though ha ha

[SideSet]

My twins, that is wonderful how your wife is,   Including getting you started wearing a bra. 

Brock, how did the conversation go that got you and your wife in women’s clothing section of Target.  And what did she do and say once she got you in there?

[brock123]

My twins, that is wonderful how your wife is,  Including getting you started wearing a bra.

Brock, how did the conversation go that got you and your wife in women’s clothing section of Target.  And what did she do and say once she got you in there?

While that was about 2 years ago now, my recollection was that there was more discretion as opposed to conversation (we also had my then 5-yr old daughter in tow that day), but I think she was honest and altruistic as to the things she thought might work for me.  Definitely concerned with an apparent fixation on female garments as opposed to seeking out a male garment solution, but was accepting of that.  After the brick-and-mortar visit where we did pick up a couple things, it turned to an Internet visit to pick up a couple more different things to try out. One was very thick/tight and felt more like I was deep sea diving (pass), and the other was too "frilly" for my taste (also pass), but other than digging into my armpit to much it did the trick.

None of that stuff ever really worked out, though.  While I felt much more comfortable with myself, and also needed smaller pants to wear these if they were "longline" (LOL), she noted things like the neckline(s) were pretty clearly feminine and that led me back into self-consciousness territory. The fact that hugs became awkward if I was trying to work through this with garments was a big thing for me too.  

I'd say I had a good two weeks where my wife was both acutely aware of my problem and was willing to accept it, but that acceptance waned.  I went to a physician, I got a mammogram, I was told it was just fat, I was told that reducing my BMI would help, etc and so on.

Fast forward to now, my BMI is back to "all good" but I'm still a bit "busty" compared to other men (1/2" to 3/4" protrusion), and I would greatly prefer to wear a compression/sports bra if I thought I could get away with it.  Sadly my wife has been going through a "female problem" for many months now so attraction/sex has been off the table and won't be for a while longer.

To summarize, I have a wife that was apparently willing to accept the condition, but it turned out to be fake and I've long since retreated into my previous "concealment" position and deal with this in secret, if at all.

[SideSet]

I can understand how that was awkward for her and you. At least she tried.  Sad she could not stick with it.  But in my experience, most women can’t and many won’t even try, and yours at least did. 

Seems like she has retreated into denial and other things. 

Also seems like you have done all you could.  How did you feel about the doctors and mammogram?  Did she accompany and how did she react?

Good that you have managed as best you can now.  Sounds like a challenge, though, is it?

[brock123]

I can understand how that was awkward for her and you. At least she tried.  Sad she could not stick with it.  But in my experience, most women can’t and many won’t even try, and yours at least did.

Seems like she has retreated into denial and other things.

Also seems like you have done all you could.  How did you feel about the doctors and mammogram?  Did she accompany and how did she react?

Good that you have managed as best you can now.  Sounds like a challenge, though, is it?

If this was directed my way, I felt that my male PCP was "fine" with everything and was analytical as opposed to judgmental, and did try to assess why this condition was "so" and what my feelings were about it.  He ordered the mammogram to be sure that he wasn't missing something from his physical exam.  The mammogram experience was kind of awkward (below), but handled professionally in my opinion.  My follow-up with a female specialist prior to the mammogram was equally professional and less awkward.  She happened to be training someone (male) and let me know that was the case and asked how comfortable I was with allowing this person to feel me up.  I was fine with this, and learned things as a result.

My only complaint, per-se, to date was the awkwardness at the radiologist for the mammogram: I felt like I had the plague up to the point where the tech came out and got me (NOTE: this was all pre-COVID). After check-in I was asked to sit by myself away from any women and was personally escorted through a side door when my time came so that no female patients would see me.  I thought this was a bit much, and/or uncalled for.

In the end, every legitimate medical professional that I came into contact with was exemplary, and that's what matters, right? While I did not expect the abundance of caution around females, I'm sure that was put in place for a reason.  The goal was still attained.  

[SideSet]

Thanks for sharing.  Of course, it was awkward, but you handled well, and so did most medical personnel, except when you were thoughtlessly segregated. Glad the results were healthy.