that i have gynecomastia... I remember way back when i was 11 i started developing these dreaded manboobs (i'm now 24). First, it developed on my right chest as a swollen gland and came to the attention of my older brother, who would always poke fun at it whenever it'd get changed in front of him (shared the same room).
Sometimes he'd even try to grab it (i refer "it" because at the time it only affected my right chest), twisting it and all without knowing the mental anguish it would cause me. Even though we were pretty close back then i never really did talk to him about it because of the shame i felt, sometimes even laughing with him if he joked about it, when it really was ripping me inside.
As the years progressed, so did the size of my right boob. My left boob tried to keep up as well, but even so the right side was always noticeably bigger, even til this day. I stopped being close to my brother because the dumbarse would always persist on reminding me how much my chest would resemble a girl's. I also sorta took upon an introverted kinda personality, even though i was already a very shy kid. My parents saw this and seemed very worried, but i never talked to them about it and i'm sure they noticed i had unusually big breasts but i'm not sure if they ever connected the two.
Teasings and jokes were more common throughout my high school years, i would do my best to avoid situations where chest exposure was necessary (believe me that was hard to do when you like sports), i would completely avoid swimming and if i ever needed to take my shirt off in front of the boys i would make sure i'd have my other shirt ready to go on at the drop of a dime, hoping my unusually large mamary glands would not come into anyone's field of vision.
But that was the least of my problems, as it seemed even with my shirt on my boobs would always protrude, and to try and hide them i would try to push my shoulders forward giving a sorta stiff shouldered hunchback pose. Without thought, this became my standard posture throughout the years (and how weird it would've looked to others). I kinda became very uptight around people as well even alienating myself around my friends, but i still couldn't muster up the courage to talk to anyone about it or seek help.
After highschool, i peaked at around 98kg (5'10") from all the constant junking to make myself feel better, but i've managed to lose abit of weight to around 84kg now and my breasts are noticeably smaller but still probably on the larger end compared to some of the pictures i've seen on this board. I will definitely get some pictures up once i get a hold of a digital camera.
But i must say since stumbling upon this board, i've felt alot better about my situation and just knowing there are people out there like me helps greatly. I know i'm still overweight so i'm gonna try and drop more kgs, afterwhich, i'm sure they will reduce in size but probably not enough to get over the anxiety problems i've developed because of them. Hopefully i can save enough for surgery, as that's the only way i think these mental scars can truely begin to heal.
Topic: Finally, I know... (Read 2852 times)
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