Males Staying Males

[42CSurprise!]

I stumbled on a website some time ago on the topic of men wishing to "grow" their breasts.  Many of them are transsexuals who are on the path to transitioning but one sub-forum is devoted to "Males Staying Male."  We've discussed this topic but from the perspective not of GROWING breasts but rather HAVING breasts.  That is quite a significant difference, even if when we grow breasts we wouldn't object to them becoming larger.  These men are talking about using herbs and medications to develop breasts.  One person posted this comment...

Males staying males is a tough line to walk when there's two perky female breasts on your chest and your body is full of female hormones. I supposed there's someone out there who can maintain the manly man line with perky boobs and estrogen running through his veins, but  I consider him a rarity.  I think bra discussions are unavoidable when you have breasts to support. And with all that estrogen flowing through the veins, girly discussions are inevitable.  Like it or not, if you're growing boobs intentionally, there's some underlying level of transsexualism that must acknowledged. Manly-manly alpha male men do not want boobs.

This person seems to understand completely what we're dealing with.  But one fellow objected to this line of thinking...

Pretty horrible comment, to be honest.
 Men are not just alpha-males or sissies. And hormones don't make you talk about football or bras.

Many male-staying-males users on this site are dominant men who may or may not crossdress and, regardless of their reasons to want boobs, they just want breasts.
It's a very old ongoing conversation on this forum. Males-staying-males seem to get little respect from other users who transitioned or that identify as trans*. This section of the site is for guys who mean to remain guys, doing guys' jobs, drinking guys' drinks, watching guys' TV, and then adding whatever they feel they like, like bras, boobs, a plump ass, heels, or whatever, to their life.

Men with breasts is obviously a very complex topic.  When I initiated the thread called Transgender but Not Transitioning I made the case for "staying men" but I had no intention to deny the influence of hormones on the fact I have breasts... quite voluptuous breasts actually.  It strikes me the first quote recognizes that reality, while the second is resisting it though in the end he appears to recognize going down this path can have a multitude of affects on our lives.

We're not alone in straying from the norm...

[blad]

I am thinking this is very different than those of us developing breasts at puberty and learning to adapt to the situation as opposed to someone attempting by choice to develop breasts.

Although many of us have adapted and accepted our situation, and embraced wearing a bra for best practical management, it was not originally by choice.

I am guessing this site is about managing what we did not ask for.

[Johndoe1]

While I agree this is more of a "maintenance site of what we have been given", it is certainly not out of the realm that questions develop about things that would only be considered " feminine" by the general population. And some of the maintenance talk would be considered things "only women talk about" but the reality is if you have breasts, this is what you talk about. This what you do for breast health.

Do I feel uncomfortable on occasion talking about such womanly things? Yes. But it is only because society has told me it is. It doesn't take into account of my personal needs to discuss these topics. So I do and find I am better informed because of it. The medical personal (women mostly) who have spent the time to talk to me about my breasts has been a big help in accepting my chest for what it is and to give me encouragement to not be afraid of my body being so called "different". I appreciate that immensely. That too helps in my acceptance of my body and being able to talk about what to do and how to do it.

I understand that the estrogen that surges through my blood affects me physically as well as mentally. I have had to come to that realization and accept what I can not change. While I might be able to have my breasts removed, the estrogen still remains. Still affecting me. It is true to all of us with elevated estrogen to testosterone ratio no matter how big or small our breasts are.

[42CSurprise!]

I've mentioned before that I've been a "breast man" over the years, though the breasts that interested me were always on women.  I know I'm not alone in that.  Then I remember visiting a family friend whose very young daughter was sitting on her mother's lap as we spoke.  That daughter was also my god-daughter.  I was taking a class in university at the time on the subject of child development.  As we spoke the little girl proceeded to unbutton the front of her mother's blouse.  My friend was not wearing a brassiere, obviously because she had been nursing her daughter.  The girl pulled the blouse open and stared at the exposed breasts, her eyes moving from one to the other.  I have no doubt that every child who is breast fed will have a fascination with breasts.  That this fascination could remain in our subconscious is not surprising.

I mention all of that in the context of this thread because whatever is motivating these men, fascination with having breasts of their own is a complicated subject.  Perhaps it is hormones at play or perhaps it is something psychological.  It is true that we come by our breasts without making a conscious choice to alter our bodies, but we are still left with the necessity of coming to terms with these breasts that are very much our own.  We don't need to consider transitioning to be left making sense of breasts and brassieres as well as developing curves in our bodies.  Many men here have expressed their appreciation of the breasts that have appeared on their chest.  Yes, we begin perhaps with shame if they developed when we were young but acceptance carries with it a very different relationship to what is happening with our bodies.  Having breasts is a big deal and embracing what nature has bestowed on us makes sense if we're not afraid of being other than a manly man. 

What a journey we're all on...

[42CSurprise!]

I've been reading this site and am finding men who are pursuing breast augmentation with support of their wives... with no intention to transition.  Here is what one of them said...

I'm a 59-year-old male. I have been thinking about getting breasts implants for the past 20 years or so, but I don’t want to transition as a female, I just want bigger breasts. I feel good about myself when I think about this and all the what ifs disappear.

Below is a photo taken after he had surgery...


Again, us men have a wide range of feelings about having breasts.  Men come to this website initially because we are disturbed by what is happening.  We may come to acceptance, but it can be grudgingly so.  These men come to that website because they long to have breasts, without any intention of transitioning.  They end up in a situation similar to what happens to us EXCEPT without the estrogen, they're still able to perform sexually... at least that is what this man said about decisions he was making.  His wife is fine with him getting breasts, so it works on every level.  Wow!  So many ways to live a life.

[Justagirl💃]

I've been reading this site and am finding men who are pursuing breast augmentation with support of their wives... with no intention to transition.  Here is what one of them said...

I'm a 59-year-old male. I have been thinking about getting breasts implants for the past 20 years or so, but I don’t want to transition as a female, I just want bigger breasts. I feel good about myself when I think about this and all the what ifs disappear.

Below is a photo taken after he had surgery...


Again, us men have a wide range of feelings about having breasts.  Men come to this website initially because we are disturbed by what is happening.  We may come to acceptance, but it can be grudgingly so.  These men come to that website because they long to have breasts, without any intention of transitioning.  They end up in a situation similar to what happens to use EXCEPT without the estrogen, they're still able to perform sexually... at least that is what this man said about decisions he was making.  His wife is fine with him getting breasts, so it works on every level.  Wow!  So many ways to live a life.

Individuality is like grains of sand on a beach. 😉

There are endless options of just being YOU! 💞

[42CSurprise!]

Individuality is like grains of sand on a beach. 😉

There are endless options of just being YOU! 💞

I think it is difficult for most of us to accept that what you say is true.  We're inclined to live with ideas about what life is "supposed" to be like and invariably we shame ourselves when we don't fit whatever stereotype we carry around in our minds... typically notions we picked up from our family of origin.  We generally choose the religion we grew up with and the political party our parents committed to.  Yes, we may rebel during our teen years but we won't go far from what we learned as kids.  We come here because breasts are sprouting on our chests which don't fit in any man's idea of what it means to be a man.  As we learned self-acceptance we often come to the realization you express... we really all are different.  Expecting others to fit OUR notion of what it means to be a man, a woman, an American, a Briton is pure foolishness.

My former wife is in communication with her cousin who graduated summa cum laude from Brandeis university... a librarian by profession who now lives with her five cats in a home she owns without heat or hot water in a northern state... a three story home with boarded windows above the first floor.  And she isn't certain she has the ability to better her situation though her home is probably worth a half million dollars.  She may die in that home but that is the only way she seems able to do this life.  She's 76 years old.

I've visited a friend's home that was filled with banker boxes stacked three high.  There was a narrow path between the boxes from the front door through his living room to his kitchen.  The man is a computer specialist who carries three by five cards in his shirt pocket with a pen he uses to make notes.  There was a stack of these cards on the top of his bookcase that was perhaps eighteen inches high.

So, yes there are endless options for being who we are in the world.  I live in a very well to do community in one of the wealthiest counties in California with homeless people begging on street corners as BMWs, Teslas and Bentleys drive by.  Wow!  My having breasts I appreciate is small potatoes in this wild world.

[taxmapper]

Those of us who are falling in between need to accept that we cant have the super sexy feminine curvey body per se. 

Instead we wind up with something in-between, usually with a strong male bent. 

Those who augment, well, more power to them. 

Personally I want natural breasts and if God saw fit, LARGE!  
But that's me. 


I have a strong male muscular structure and there is no denying that. 
Fat wise mostly male, but some female and skeletal strong evidence of a heavy female dominance though large.   
Ill take it. 

After starting this wonderful and interesting journey of going from a desired Alpha-male wanna be to where I am at now, I feel no inclination to criticize or admonish anyone who want to desire the boobs. the thighs, or anything else. 

Strong learning experience for sure. 

[Johndoe1]

I too am not desiring to criticize anyone's decisions about their life or body. We each have to "do us" no matter where on the gender line that is. I suspect most men here are on the male side of the line with a smaller group in the middle, happy being male but also happy for our female side to peer out and be seen, while an even smaller group is firmly on the female side and at least one openly transgender MTF,  but IMHO, she was always female, but due to a fluke in the genes, did not develop female.

I like our community of people here. We are gender diversified and am learning from everyone. I believe that strengthens all of us no matter where we fall on that gender line.

[42CSurprise!]

I like our community of people here. We are gender diversified and am learning from everyone. I believe that strengthens all of us no matter where we fall on that gender line.

I agree with you John.  I hope the wide ranging conversations we have here help men who arrive to find acceptance for who they are and how they are living their lives.  I thought that yesterday as the fellow who wears a short skirt and brassiere rode past me on his bicycle.  Yes, I'm curious about who he is but my curiosity is without judgment.  I wasn't wearing a brassiere at that moment but only because there was a bit of tenderness beneath my left breast.  I look at the photo above and am aware his augmented breasts are not much bigger than my own.  They're probably smaller than yours.  So here we all are.  

[gotgyne]

I don't see any problem with everyone (male, female or in-between) who wants to modify parts of the body. But this must come solely from the person him- or herself. Forced modification as for example in Chinese women in former times (footbinding) or in European and American women (corsets) are to disapprove. That manly men get breast augmentation is not new. About the year 2000 I was in a Yahoo group for exactly this purpose. There was a man (he called himself "Wags") who had huge breasts which were augmented by a surgeon in Nevada. This doctor had absolutely no problem to perform this kind of surgery in males who did not want to transition. Unfortunately he retired some years ago. Some men even get voluntary castration but don't transition and choose to live still as males but under HRT with testosterone. Some get a bilateral orchiectomy and penectomy (emasculation) but don't transition. There is also a forum for these men since about 20 years. Other men do various forms of body modification as meatotomy or penile subincision (both on wikipedia) and much more.
For a list of body modifications look here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_body_modifications
The problem is that most physicians follow the rule "primum non nocere" (first, do no harm) and for this reason refuse to perform such surgeries. And of course there is the law which in some cases may prohibit such surgeries. The following problem is that men who want this under all circumstances may go to "cutters" and other men who are no surgeons and risk massive problems or even death. In my opinion the juridical and medical community should help such men that they can get their surgery under the best conditions and without danger.
All kinds of body modification are a very fascinating topic. I have thought about breast augmentation although I have the bra size 90C. But first I take estrogen and two meds which may cause gyne (spironolactone and finasteride) and for this reason it is likely that my breasts will get bigger nevertheless and second my wife would object to surgical augmentation.
A young man who is well-endowed with his private parts and functioning perfectly may get this surgery. It can be very fascinating to have the best of man and woman in one person. But at my age with my small male thingy which looks more like that of a boy before puberty and regarding my inability to get an erection it would make no sense.

[42CSurprise!]

Men seeking breast implants, muscle enhancements or high definition in the chest area, represent a shifting paradigm in plastic surgery, as it’s no longer a domain exclusive to women. Whether driven by desires for a feminine appearance, career pursuits in theater or movies, gender re-assignment processes or a higher defined chest shape, these procedures are providing avenues for self-expression and identity realization, contributing to enhanced self-esteem and psychological well-being. However, a thorough understanding of the procedures, risks, and postoperative care is essential for anyone considering these transformative surgeries.

https://cadesclinic.com/can-a-man-get-breast-implants/


Again, this topic really has minimal interest for men like us who already have breasts, but it does demonstrate the reality of the world we inhabit.  I even wondered whether the plastic surgeon who markets mastectomies for men on this website would also offer breast augmentation for those men seeking larger breasts and not benefiting from the hormone stew men here know so much about.

In my fantasy life I can imagine having breast implants but they would necessarily come with the rest of a woman's curvaceous body... but that is a topic for a different website...  

[42CSurprise!]

...I look at the photo above and am aware his augmented breasts are not much bigger than my own.  They're probably smaller than yours.  So here we all are. 

I changed brassieres a moment ago and honestly, I think my breasts are BIGGER than this fellow who went under the knife to gain his breasts.  This is an older photo, but I am wearing the brassiere I have on at the moment.  I'm stacked!

[Charli 💕]

I have been both male and female all my life  so for me I'm not sure what I would transition to.  But I do know if I was offered surgery too remove my external organ and his 2 very tiny friends and just be a smooth "Ken doll", I would do it in a heartbeat! I have lived the last 30 years tucked and the last 10 tucked 24/7. It has been the only way I have been able to cope. I have come to understand that I have too many people that expect dad, granddad and great granddad to be just that, a man! Not to mention a wife that as she told me " I'm not a Lesbian, but I think you are". So we live as roommates because for her sex with me is disgusting and as a man I can no longer make love in a way she wants.

This was my choice to be all those things and I owe it to them to try, but it can be hard sometimes when you just want to wear something pretty and be yourself. 

OK, I guess I do wish I had a prettier feminine body.

Charli 💕

[42CSurprise!]

I've courted (read seduced) four women... but once I'd succeeded I had no idea how to engage in a really intimate relationship.  They all failed.  Honestly, I'm much happier as a male lesbian than as a heterosexual man... though I don't have and am not seeking a partner.  I don't need to hide my genitals but things are diminishing to the point that I really need to sit down when I urinate to avoid a mess.  Sooo... you and I are kindred spirits Charli even if you'd probably go a bit farther than I would with the "pretty things."  I do love my boobs...  I might think about sleeping in a negligee... which as a single person I could do right now... but its winter.