Surgery complete Mr Levick 05 Nov 2014 (pics/diary)

[bob1234]

Hello everyone,

First thanks to all for sharing advice and in particular diaries of their experiences, I really wouldn't have had a clue of what I was getting myself in for without them.

I have surgery booked with Levick this week, but at the moment I'm somewhat on the fence about whether I want to go through with it or not. For the last few months the only thing that could have stopped me was the £4k, and I didn't think at all about the "gravity of the operation" or if what I was doing was a little extreme (I just assumed I'd take a financial hit, go get it done recover and be "normal" in a few months, no big deal), but this and various questions started to play on my mind as the operation got very very close.

I should say, I couldn't be happier with Levick, and I have total confidence in him being the man for the job, it's just doubts about the procedure full stop. It's funny where my mind was a month a go when the OP was just an abstract thing, as then I even was considering Poland etc, but now as the money has gone out of focus and my health has come into focus, I know 100% that I couldn't have it done anywhere else.

If I do ultimately do it, I intend this post to be the first post of my own diary.

My first question is obviously "can I actually get out of it now anyway!?", would I likely get a refund, or am I locked in? In which it's time to just stop thinking and get on with it.

Next something about my background:

It's probably a similar story to most, so I'll try and be brief. I'm now nearly 30, but as a teenager I was pretty chubby (OK, I was fat), around 16st at my heaviest at 5'11. Sometime around 6-7 years ago I started running and really got into it, started eating a lot better and stabilised around 10st09lbs for the last 4-5 years. Of course the moobs did not go, and in a last ditch attempt I dropped another stone over the last few months to 10st on the dot.  At this weight, my arms and shoulders look pretty ridiculous (the film The Machinest comes to mind!), as I don't have much muscle mass (running killed my muscle mass too, weights definitely needed next). The reasons for dropping again were 1) convince myself absolutely that the gyne wasn't going to go 2) be as lean as possibly to aid surgery if I were to have it.

I'll attach a picture, but I have to admit I think my gyne is on the mild-moderate side compared to some I've now seen. I've gone through the usual self-consciousness and being mocked because of it (especially in my teenage years), and combined with being fat as a teen, it's certainly lowered my confidence level a lot, but although it makes me feel pretty shitty about my body (less confident than I now should be with girls, less than happy on a beach holiday etc), I still have managed to do these things. I go on beach holidays, I take my top off on the beach, still wear t-shirts (although admittedly not tight fitting), go swimming pools etc. Basically it's not debilitating, not inhibiting me from living my life. It's just making me less confident about my body. Also I feel like after all this exercise with running I deserve to look better without my top on! Basically I still feel like I'm fat because of it, and I have the associated confidence level, even though I'm now not fat. I want to do weights next, and look good, and I feel like if I work I will be rewarded by looking good, not rewarded by pecs with gyne on top, and still being only just "alright" with how I look.

Different phases I've gone through recently

1) This panic about everything phase. I worried about dying from the general, having a blood clot or being allergic to some drug. I worried about waking up during the operation and being paralysed but still feeling the pain, then having post traumatic stress! and so on...I think I've rationalised these things to myself now. More chance of dying on the drive to the op (not that I'll be driving) and all that...more chance of dying on airplane probably (both optional not compulsory things that I do to improve my quality of life, but which carry similar risks, and which I do more often too and without even thinking twice).

2) Worrying about transitory pain or discomfort. When I got over 1) I started worrying about nausea from the general, not sleeping for weeks because of the tight binder/comp vest digging in. Feeling like crap having to be strapped up for months barely able to move. Eventually I realised this might be pretty rough, but it will be pass, and I shouldn't be such a wuss, as it's nothing compared to being happier in 6 months if that will be the case.

3) The realisation that this op, although maybe minor compared to a triple bypass is still an operation. I'm putting my body through a massive massive trauma, for something that by my own admission is not inhibiting me from doing much (it basically traps me and my confidence level into feeling a bit "chubby" forever, is the best way I can put it, no matter how much I work out). It certainly lowers my confidence, and I REALLY would prefer it gone, but I wouldn't say it's crushing me or anything. Maybe I could just get on with life and stop being so vein and obsessing on the small things since it's so rare than I am in an embarrassing spot because of it anyway.

I'm confident with Levick that he'll get rid of my moobs, but what if I exchange them for some other issue? Pins and needles and weird feeling chest and nipples forever? A weird dint or strange looking nipple for life that I feel still quite bad about?

Information that I'd be grateful for

1) Just how does your chest feel in say a year? Does it still feel unusual, like pins and needles or strangely numb, jabbing pains? Still feel like you had an OP? Or will it eventually feel just like it did before the OP? I have a finger whose nerve I severed when I was younger, and that has never been quite the same, although it doesn't hurt at all or really bother me. I'd kind of like to know if my whole chest is going to feel like that for life?

2) Scar tissue. As I understand it after a few weeks, I will get lumps and bumps of gristly scar tissue under my skin, and must massage to dissipate. Does it ever occur that this scar tissue sticks around indefinitely, or is it almost always gone after a year?

3) Skin, does your skin eventually feel normal again, not slightly lose or disconnected etc?

4) What was the thing that surprised you most post OP, the thing you really had not expected?

5) Even if you were overall very happy, what disappointed you most from your expectations of your result?

I understand how these questions are probably irrelevant for a lot of sufferers, since even if they are genuine negatives, their unhappiness due to the gyne was a LOT worse, so it's a positive tradeoff, but for my mild state of affairs and psych state, I need to try and weigh up this balance.

At the moment, my mood toward it is really swinging, one minute I want to go for it, then next I'm convinced I want to just cancel and get on with life.

[bob1234]

Some pics (as you can see, it's worse on one side)

[AchillesUK]

Hey Bob,

Well done for posting and for also making the first step to getting rid of your gyne. Also great work on losing all that weight you had before. I've read most of your post. I've not hit the 1 year mark (9 months to go for that) so I cant answer the specific questions at the end. But some thoughts on your other points:

* If you've already handed over the money, and the surgery is this week, I'm guessing getting a refund might be tricky. I know some other clinics e.g. Dr. Karidis, when I called them they were black and white, money had to be in X weeks in before and zero chance of ever getting a refund. Mr Levick generally is a lot more understanding and if you really feel this surgery isnt for you then he may well refund you. However, think carefully before emailing any of the reservations you mentioned above. Initially I emailed a list of questions to Mr Levick (before surgery or payment) and he said he didnt think I should go for surgery, as he has a policy that if you're in doubt then dont go for it. I believe this is on his website as well. I went for my consultation anyway and in the end I had surgery as mentioned, but he did misinterpret my reservations/questions as a sign that I would pull out of surgery.

* The surgery is relatively straightforward, its not a high risk operation and I would disagree its a major trauma for you. If you were over 60, severely obese, had hypertension and diabetes then perhaps you would be taking a risk. But you're young, in good shape and this operation has been done thousands of times by Mr Levick. If there had been a fatality I'm sure we would have heard of it. Plus they have experienced anaesthesists on site, as well as intensive care facilities should anything go wrong.

* You mentioned working out may improve your self esteem. Well I tried that for years. If anything it makes the gyne even more prominent as the muscle pushes the breast tissue even further out.

* I understand your frustration about all the running. I also reduced my bodyfat significantly in the couple of years before surgery (there are pictures on my thread), yet the gyne was still there. Ultimately, and as I'm sure Mr Levick told you, only surgery will get rid of it.

* Yes recovery is not smooth sailing but it's 6-12 months out of your whole life and never having to worry about it again. And a lot of people post great pictures after just a couple of months and you never hear from them again, presumably because they're perfectly happy with their results.

* Post op issues - dents, nipples etc. trust me I know the feeling because I've had several issues post op. However, I'm never overly worried because I know I can always go back to Mr Levick for free. If you scroll back a couple of pages you'll see members who went back and had further corrective (minor, day procedures) surgery completely free. I'm sure Mr Levick earns a lot but he cares more about his patients than he does about charging for every second he works i.e. the 4k you've paid is all that you will ever pay.

* Yes its not debilitating physically and you've been braver than most, but its clearly bothering you. If you pull out now it may bother you even more. If you find, after pulling out, that it is still bothering you in the coming years, you may feel you cant go back to Mr Levick (or maybe he will advise you not to go back), you may not have the finance later, you may start a family and cant get this procedure done discretely etc etc.
At the end of the day this is cosmetic surgery, and cosmetic surgery is not for correcting physical or physiological issues, but rather parts of us that affect our confidence. From what you have posted it does affect your confidence, as it has affected everyone else on here before surgery.

My 2 cents - just go for it. Its normal to be apprehensive, but just knuckle down and you'll be fine. You've paid the money, you only live once and in a year you'll more than likely never worry about your gyne again.

[bob1234]

Thanks for the reply and encouragement Achilles! I read a big chunk of your thread, and hope it got better for you in the end in regards to the swelling!

I've still not 100% made my mind up, so I guess I'll post more later.

[flatterchest]

I totally understand how you are feeling. I recently had my surgery done so all the feelings you describe are still relatively fresh in my mind. I remember thinking how grateful I was to be alive, and that it was madness that I was risking major surgery for this (because like you, I would say I had relatively minor gyne).

What I can say now is that I don't regret the surgery for a moment. Whether gyne is mild or extreme, it is still not what a man wants to see when they look in the mirror, and surgery has had a profound effect on how I feel about myself.

To answer your questions -

1. I cannot say how my chest feels a year on as it has not been a year yet. However, a month on, and my chest feels comfortable and almost the same as before (except flat!). Nipple sensitivity has almost completely returned.

2. Scar tissue has come and gone, but for the most part, it seems to correct itself. Over the last few weeks, I had bruising and scar tissue but just followed the post-operative instructions, and the swelling has completely gone, and most of the scar tissue dissipated without me even needing to massage it.

3. Skin feels normal and connected a month on from the surgery.

4. Yes, there were a few days where the compression vest felt quite tight, and I felt sore. However, it never got so bad that I could not sleep. A month on, I am completely comfortable! Totally worth those few days of discomfort. A few days after the surgery, one side of my chest got really hard and bruised (haematoma). It felt so hard that it was impossible to believe it would correct itself - I thought something must had gone wrong with the surgery. Got checked by the surgeon, who told me to just wait it out. Well, a few weeks later, the haematoma has completely gone, and my chest looks just fine! So that goes to show, your chest can get lumpy/bumpy/bruised and even haematomery and still come out good!

5. I can honestly say I'm not disappointed about a single thing. The only thing that disappointed me was how sick I felt on the journey home from the surgery because those strong pain-killers made me feel ill. Also, I got hiccups that night from the anaesetic, and that really got me so mad cause they would not stop and it was painful! Other than that, I am happy with everything. It has improved every aspect of my life from my posture, my clothes choices, my confidence, my masculinity, on and on and on.

[bob1234]

In the end I cancelled .

Credit to Mr Levick and Gail, as they were unbelievably understanding and said I would not be penalised (I'm sure that this wouldn't
have been the case if I'd chosen a different surgeon!). I feel terrible and an idiot for being so uncertain in myself, and for wasting their time to be honest.

I have spent pretty much the entire last few days mulling this over. Times when I have been 100% sure I was going to do it, and absolutely
excited and almost euphoric to be finally taking the step, then other times when I've been asking myself "what on earth am I doing??". I would feel
each very strongly for about an hour then I'd change to the opposite. Very strange. I was minutes from jumping on a bus down to Birmingham (I planned hotel stay night before), and minutes away from sending a cancellation email.

Now that it's over and not going to happen, I kind of look back and think it probably all would have been fine. I probably would have regained
normal sensation in my chest (maybe even nipple which I was less bothered about) in a year or two, scar tissue probably probably wouldn't have caused visible bumps or if it did they'd probably be gone in a year. Haeomotoma/serotoma probably wouldn't have occured, and if they did they'd have been a simple matter to deal with and they probably wouldn't have wrecked my end result.

In the end there were just too many 'maybes' for me. If my gyne was worse, or at least if I perceived it as worse to the point where I couldn't function in some way (whether that be girls, beaches or whatever) it would have been a no-brainer to proceed, but for me it is more about achieving my ideal body, not just being "OK" with it or telling myself "it's fine", but sculpting myself into exactly what I want to be (weights after this), and not feeling frustrated that exercise didn't deliver a great physique, just a still flabbyish looking one. I couldn't decide if this meant it was just vanity for me rather than a debilitating thing, and more importantly I couldn't decide if I was alright with it being just vanity. If it was just a question of money, I'd do it, vanity of not, life is too short for moral dilemmas like that, but when potential health complications or potentially worsening your body in some way are staring you in the face (however small you might think the risks are) you really need to be absolutely sure it's worth it for you. I found it hard to know if I could live with myself in the unlikely event something went wrong, if I didn't 100% need to do it.

Not sure now if I just got the pre-OP jitters and was a fool or not, the mind and fear can play funny tricks on you. I think given such wild wavering from yes/no I probably made the right decision for now. Although it's hard not to feel a complete anti-climax sensation now, and like a coward.

I guess I'll just live out the next year, and see how I feel like in 12 months, and if I find that actually yes I am unhappy and it's because of these damn moobs, I'll come back hopefully with a more solid mental state that can resist the worries.

[freedom1987]

Honestly cannot believe you bailed out last minute. The only bad part about the operation is the build up to the big day, the recovery is easy. You litterly do nothing for a couple of weeks, let yourself heal up and youll be fine.
(8 weeks post op).
There is no pain, none.
Swelling? It happens if your too active early on,
Scar tissue, part of the healing progress. Less swelling, less scar tissue.
pins and needles, ive had it a couple of times recently. It litterly feels like a chest hair has poked thru ur tshirt and is getting pulled a little. You touch the area, the feeling is gone.
Feeling bad after the GA? Surely youve had a hangover before? How much worse can it be?


Working out makes it worse, makes the breast stick out even more.
Also.. you know what having muscle does to you?

It makes people look at you, it makes females and guys check you out. Then people realise your chest has something wrong with it. People are more likely to touch you aswell. Ever had a female grab your chest expecting it to be rock hard and it was infact just as soft has hers? I have, its a horrible and soul destroying feeling. She never said anything, it didnt change how the night ended but that feeling of shame will haunt me for years.



Please do yourself the massive favor of rebooking and going through with this, it will change your life for the better. Youve gotta accept you wont have a perfect chest, youll most likely be left with 2 small scars that nobody will care about or even notice.

If i was you i would be in world of regret right now!!!!!!

[AchillesUK]

Freedom -

I have to disagree that he should be in a world of regret. You'll see I encouraged him to go ahead with it too, but at the same time its his choice. There are many men out there who do have gynecomastia and choose not to do anything about it. I believe there is in fact a whole subsection on this forum called 'acceptance'.

Bob - you've made your decision, I think the best thing for you is to just be happy with your decision. It was obviously a huge call going for surgery, and then even a bigger one to cancel at the very last minute (huge credit to Mr Levick for giving a refund. It could possibly be the case they wont be able to get anyone in for your spot and hence lose out on 4k and I dont think any other surgeon would have offered it).

But you cancelled and then you seemed to experience more regret about your decision of cancelling? It's one or the other to be honest, you either have surgery and get rid of your gynecomastia or not have it. But the worst thing you can do IMO is to continuously to and fro and regret every decision that you are making.

One point I do disagree with is that whether gynecomastia removal is pure vanity or not. Sure every cosmetic procedure by definition can be described as being vain. But there's a difference between for example having a big nose reshaped, or ears etc. every man has a nose, ears, eyelids and they all vary to certain extent.

Gyneco ("woman") mastia ("breasts) by definition should not be on any man. By the very word itself, these are female body parts. Almost as bad as if a woman were to have partial male genitalia.

Anyway, at the end of the day its completely your decision. If you change your mind soon I'm not sure Mr Levick would take you back, it may have to be Dr. Karidis or someone else, and the latter certainly isnt as generous as Mr Levick when it comes to cancellations etc. so think carefully before changing your mind again. Good luck.

[bob1234]

Thanks for the replies again.

Now that I'm not staring down an anaesthetist's needle, my fears have subsided a lot, and truthfully I have mostly returned to the state of mind which motivated me to get surgery in the first place, which is pretty frustrating given that it would've been over by now. So yeah, some regret. It's very annoying for me as until about Saturday I was really chilled out about the whole thing, even during the consultation I think I was pretty calm, but the more diaries that I read, the more my imagination took off about every eventuality. I think I just need someone to club me over the head and drag me down there or something...

At the time I simply wavering too much (by the hour), and I as Mr Levick says "If in doubt, don't". I thought if I do it and regret it, then I'm stuck with it, whereas if I back out I can always do it later still if I regret that.

I'm obviously going to take my time now and reflect long and hard, and if I do decide to rebook then I should have the resolve to push through the fears.

I think what I was scared of most is not something going wrong, but something going wrong and then telling myself "you didn't need to do that, and you've only got your vanity to blame", it's weird, it's like I'm scared of judging myself harshly in the unlikely event of problems rather than the problems themselves. I honestly think if I was having surgery for my appendix out, I'd just get on with it.

The problem is I know once I get to critical stage again, I'm going to be bricking it again,
I was planning on going alone today, but I'm hoping if I rebook and get my girlfriend to come along, it will be enough to push me through all the preop tension. It's a pitty that we can't drink before the OP as that would probably be sufficient too.

One point I do disagree with is that whether gynecomastia removal is pure vanity or not. Sure every cosmetic procedure by definition can be described as being vain. But there's a difference between for example having a big nose reshaped, or ears etc. every man has a nose, ears, eyelids and they all vary to certain extent.

I should clarify that I definitely don't think it's vanity for everyone. There's no question that for some people with extreme cases, or even for those with mild cases to be honest, it can be a debilitating thing that limits their happiness, so I was only asking the question for my own case.

Maybe I just judge myself too harshly for wanting to sort this out. After all I'm quite happy to spend hours running or at the gym, and money on expensive memberships just to look better plain and simple, so I'm not sure why I've got a complex about making myself look better through this.

For me it's a bit like being fat or something, I don't look as good as I could do or would like to, I would ideally like to be more than just "OK" with how I look, but actually confident and proud of how I look I guess. Moreover, I want to be rewarded proportionally in my body if I were to weight-lift etc. If I was with a new girl, I'd have a moment of fear as she saw me without my top on, if I was with new friends on a holiday, I wouldn't be very happy on the beach. Having said that the keyword here is "new", generally I find most people worth having as long term friends or partners really don't care so much about my moobs, only I do. It definitely lowers the body image I have of myself for sure, and I can't estimate what effect it has had on my confidence, not to mention that if I keep it I'd always have to be mentally strong enough to beat it over the head. Which is damn frustrating.

If I could click my fingers I'd 100% get rid. I guess the question is how much would I actually risk/pay to get rid of it in the real world. I think the £4k is no problem, happily spend it for this. It's just the rubbish I have in my imagination about messing up my chest or worse that I wouldn't pay...but in reality I don't need to be willing to pay that anyway...I need to get that straight in my head..

It's a bit like me living with a small toothache rather than getting a general, in case something goes wrong with the OP and because I think the tootache is only annoying..

Anyway, at the end of the day its completely your decision. If you change your mind soon I'm not sure Mr Levick would take you back, it may have to be Dr. Karidis or someone else, and the latter certainly isnt as generous as Mr Levick when it comes to cancellations etc. so think carefully before changing your mind again. Good luck.

Mr Levick has been more than supportive, and they said without me even asking they'd gladly rebook me. Just another confirmation that he is the surgeon you want to be having this done with!!

I feel like offering him a wager, "take me back but only on the condition that if I cancel you keep the cash", I know the money will push me through the fears!

[AchillesUK]

Well that's very kind of Mr Levick.

IMO the best guy for you would be Dr. Karidis, I think his refund policy would help stop you changing your mind every 2 minutes!

[freedom1987]

Said i would be regretting it, not he should be regretting it.


Maybe if you look at the procedure in a different light it would help.

If you had the procedure, one thing mr Levick is gonna guarantee is no more female breats on a man.
So as a worst case scenario you will have a normal, male looking chest with a tshirt on.

Is that so bad as a worst possible outcome?
If problems happen when you are healing up, hes gonna fix it for free.

Would 100% take someone with you, you did the right thing pulling out if you planned on going alone!
You really do need someone to carry things, help you get a shirt on and even stuff like doors can be heavy after the surgery.


Take some time, maybe lower the expections a little.
I think deep down you really want this, we will support you as much as possible if you decide to go through with it!

[flatterchest]

I agree with what everyone else has said. Take some time out and see how you feel at a later date. At the end of the day, you have to feel comfortable with the decision you're making. The only thing I would say is: reading all the experiences is helpful to a degree. But honestly, when I look back at all the reading I did BEFORE THE SURGERY... about scar tissue, post-operative instructions, pain, it all sounded complicated and intense. However, when you actually have the procedure done, it's not as intense/convoluted as it comes across when someone is describing it 'on paper' so to speak. But that's just for you to consider IF you decide to have it done at a later date. For now, rest assured you made the right choice for yourself taking into account your personal circumstances.

[bob1234]

Well, I had it done! Sat in the priory now recovering. I'll write some more about it later, but so far my experience has been good. I didn't have any nausea from the GA (which I totally expected given how I get seasick and other things), I came around about 1300 I guess, then just felt a bit groggy, bit like waking up in the middle of the night or something, I could talk but often offended my girlfriend by launching into open mouthed snore whilst she was mid-sentance . I was also quite shivery when I first came around, but the heated blanket quickly sorted that out. It got better as the day went on, and I'd say around 8pm I was more or less clear of the sleepy drifting in and out. Taking a pee was also pretty interesting for the first few hours, but got there in the end. I woke up incredibly thirsty too, but no throat pain, just a super thirst, so needed lots of water during the day.

As for pain, there is a little near the armpits were the binder sits, but (at least with the painkillers) it is not much at all.

Mr Levick and all the staff here were of course great, the room and food are also top notch.

Just got the night here now (I don't expect much sleep with the water machine, DVT compression machine, nurses and ater the sleep during the day, but oh well), then hopefully tomorrow I'll get the famous burger shot and be on my way!

Thanks to everyone here for advice along the way!

[AchillesUK]

Awesome, glad to hear you bit the bullet and went through with it in the end.

[bob1234]

Thanks Achilles, and here is the infamous burger shot



80g from right and 74g from left (50, 50 of fat from each). Definitely looks more than I was expecting!