To bra, or not to bra

[JohannK]

That is the question...

On a more straight-faced note, I've been wondering about this for a while, and finally managed to join (for some reason I kept getting "forbidden.  Dangerous network" with different browsers, different ISPs, different devices, different email addresses, and even trying with a VPN).  Let's see...

1.  Going on 27 years, development started fairly recently (a few years ago).
2.  Last I measured, I was hovering around 34C, 36A, 36B going purely by the two basic measurements.
3.  I don't notice any jiggling while walking at a normal pace, but when I walk more quickly I do feel a destinctive "thud" in my chest area.
4.  I do suffer from chafing in the winter.  Not a problem right now as our winter was very short lived.
5.  I do have back pain, but it's hard to say if the gyno is a contributing factor.  I fell from stairs back in school, and my back has never been the same.
6.  This is a marjor point - I'm in South Africa.  So keep in mind that society here (and the entire family, myself included) is rather conservative to put it mildly.  I personally try to acknowledge valid points though, in case somebody wonders.
7.  Another important note.  Due to life having happened, I had to move back in with my parents.  No prospect of being on my own for the time being, I'm not even sure when I'll be able to work again.  That also raises the issue of laundry, I don't see how they will not know.

As for how  they're shaped.  When completely soft, my nipples do have a bit of a conical shape, as you'd expect.  There's not too much that I can feel, but I do feel some small lumps in the nipple areas.  I'd say they're shallow.  Also, I noticed some of my shirts (I wear button shirts almost exclusively) will sometimes struggle in the chest area depending on how I hold my arms.  I'm not doing anything to hide what I have, but I'm also (obviously) not advertising.  If I do need a bra, it might also help if I have some way to back it up.  Oh, and lastly, I'd prefer to stay away from having to wear layers.  It can get rather hot, only having aircon in the car.


Side-note:  Typing this info is not so easy...

[Johndoe1]

The choice to start wearing a bra or not is a personal one. No one can tell if you should or shouldn't. Many people may give your their opinion, but only you know your situation. Personal acceptance continues even after the decision to wear and to begin wearing has occurred.

If your breasts are self supporting, and it sounds like yours may be, then a bra probably isn't needed. You may want to look into compression shirts. You will be able to laundry those without causing suspicion but it will give you some support and will decrease your projection. If you have lumps under the nipple, then you more than likely have some degree of gynecomastia.

[JohannK]

To be honest, I'm uncertain about it.  I have come to the conclusion that it is gyno and not just fat, going by how my nipples are not lying flat.  And of course the lumps, although they are by no means large.

And yes, they're self-supporting.  The main thing I've been wondering about is discomfort of my shirt moving against them.  But fortunately the actual chafing only bothers me in the winter.

EDIT:  I'll try to get some better photos soon.  For now, this is what I mean with my nipples not lying flat.

[prc7966]

Before I started wearing a bra, I made out ok wearing a women's tank top as an undershirt. It helped immensely with chafing. They are much softer than anything I could find in the men's section, and also they were pretty well form fitting without being so tight that it is uncomfortable. They didn't help me with the bouncing all day and subsequent pain from bouncing, but it did help a lot with chafing. 

[SideSet]

Feminine, puffy nipple

[JohannK]

PRC:  I have noticed that undershirts help with chafing.  But of course I can no longer wear long sleeved ones in the winter, as the sleeves pressing against my arms can get very painful.  I'll consider sleeveless in the winter, but as it is they're all long sleeve...

Sideset:  Thought so.

[Johndoe1]

Nipple protectors are great chafing protectors as well.

[hammer]

Johndoe1 was very much right on, when he said to wear a bra or not wear one come down to a personal choice! There is no medical evidence that it is necessary to wear one! Yes, those of us with larger breasts usually have found comfort in wearing them and they reduce the wiggle and giggle of breast while moving making them less noticeable as well!

I am a (H) cub, band size unknown at this time due to loss of 40 plus pounds, but I have always been one to wear one on and off due to personal desire or mood swings, or ever temperature conditions as well. If it was hotter I would have one on to avoid to heat rash under the boob!

So, I wish you all the best in this time of figuring this all out, as it isn't any fun! At 61 I've been doing it for a long time myself!

Bob

[JohannK]

Johndoe:  I've looked that up.  At first I didn't see how that could work (I got resuslts for the wrong kind), but that might help  I have at times grabbed some electrical insulation tape out of desperation.  There is also some sensitivity spread across my breasts (might as well say it that way) which can also bother a bit, but not terribly.

Hammer:  I'm glad I don't have them that large.  Mine are by no means huge, and they might get a bit smaller when I can finally get myself to eat less and start cycling again.  But, I'm not sure to what extent they'll go away (not referring to the breast tissue).  Before the development I was also a bit overweight (I have a naturally small build), but even so I was as flat as a window pane in the chest.

I assume with them being on the decently small side with not much projection, it's safe to assume that my back pain is just from that school accident?  I'm still planning to post some decent pictures, but I messed up with my last attempt (didn't think of how the phone flash would flatten everything).

Oh, and thanks for the helpful replies.  I actually wondered if I would get the "inaugural bashing" that some new members seem to have received.

[Johndoe1]

Oh, and thanks for the helpful replies.  I actually wondered if I would get the "inaugural bashing" that some new members seem to have received.

I don't know about any "inaugural bashing", but here in the Acceptance area, all are welcome. I know in some of the other areas of this website (surgery), people are not as understanding as one would hope, and I avoid those since surgery is not what I am looking for. But here in this section of the website, we all wear bras or are thinking about wearing bras. We look out after each other.

[JohannK]

I just looked, it seems that one thread I remember was back in '05.  So that does make a bit of a difference.  In that thread a few people were very nasty, before some more helpful members started to chime in (it looks like they were too late).  I do seem to remember seeing a discussion of such comments, but I don't see it right now so I don't know when that was.  I might also be remembering it wrong.

Anyway, this is what they look like.  As I said, not that much projection.  But still, seeing myself in a mirror it's clear that anybody who looks will see them.  Although the extra weight I still want to rid myself of does make them blend in a bit.

[gyneco_jason]

On a more straight-faced note, I've been wondering about this for a while, and finally managed to join (for some reason I kept getting "forbidden.  Dangerous network" with different browsers, different ISPs, different devices, different email addresses, and even trying with a VPN).  Let's see...

I've had this problem too.

 Oh, and lastly, I'd prefer to stay away from having to wear layers.  It can get rather hot, only having aircon in the car.

This is a problem a lot of us deal with. I usually have to go with wireless bras in the summer so people don't notice the outline. I actually look forward to the cold weather because I can start wearing underwires again.

[Getting boobs]

I am fairly new to this as well. I have both wireless and underwire, I have found that I much prefer the look and feel of the underwire. There is a learning curve to getting everything to settle in the cups just right, but once you get that figured out. I feel much better in the vs a soft cup.

[Johndoe1]

While underwires shape the breast more in a feminine shape, the support, containment and comfort outweighs the look. Depending on the style of bra and the top, I have found that I can control the look of my breasts, a tactic women use all the time. As most men, I had (incorrectly) assumed that women's breasts were always on display, because that is what breasts do, right? No so. If you pay attention, most women, in non formal or semi formal situations or casual or relaxed situations, wear tops that do not show off the contours of the breast. There may be two bumps that are visible, but you don't see the contour of the breasts as you would in a dress or form fitting top that a woman would wear in a work environment or in a more formal situation that is meant to draw attention to the chest. Once I realized that and saw what they were wearing for the look, I started to convert that look into what will work for a man and I was amazed at the results. Even with underwire bras that have a lot of lift of the breasts, I could keep the look toned down. It really is true, the bra makes the top and the top makes the bra. It takes a little practice, but the results are more comfort, better support and containment and less wondering eyes. Win, win, in my book.

[JohannK]

Interesting, although it does make sense.  Women's breasts do not look the same size consistently.

For now at least it looks like the answer for me is to just go on as usual.  But I am curious, what did you learn in terms of how to dress?  I assume a looser shirt will downplay breast size?  I also noticed myself that any printing/pattern on a shirt makes it more obvious, as the pattern warps.