My Breasts

[Dale Warnio]

FredL and Goodnplenty,

Thank you for the compliments on my pictures and for the acceptance. 

FredL, how did the surgery go? You must be just beginning to recover.  Like Goodnplenty, my body shape is more like a woman’s and it’s not just that I have big breasts; I never considered surgery. 

Goodnplenty,  does your wife know you are now wearing women’s jeans?  What brands and styles do you find work best for you? Don’t you just love how soft and comfy they are, in addition to the better fit?  Ever tried jeggings?   Talk about soft and comfy, and if your wife is jealous of your butt now, just wait till she sees you in a pair of jeggings 😍

You are right that I can’t wear men’s pants and tops.   To fit my hips, butt, and thighs, too loose in the waist, and if I get the right size waist, I can’t pull them up past my thighs and hips.  Similarly with tops, if they are big enough for my bust, they fall off my shoulders, and if I get the right size on my shoulders, too tight for my bust. 

[42CSurprise!]

Appreciating this conversation.  I know we all want to be manly men... that is generally what our families and society expected of us.  Then we develop gynecomastia, some of us in adolescence and some of us later in life because of medical challenges, surgeries, drugs.  But it is important to remember that gynecomastia is the result of hormones over which we have no control unless we are intent of feminizing ourselves.  I've written about websites where men ARE trying to increase their breast size by taking supplements that will elevate estrogen.  Some even have surgery to remove their testes to reduce testosterone.  That's not happening here.  There are also websites with men actively crossdressing, wearing breast forms and butt forms to create a feminine appearance.  That's not happening here.  We're men whose bodies ARE changing, not by choice but by circumstance.  Yes, we can wail and gnash our teeth to say we don't want it.  Some men choose to have surgery, take testosterone shots, change diets.  There is nothing wrong with taking that path but surgery is expensive and not always successful.  Those of us who've had gynecomastia since puberty have lived with elevated estrogen in our bodies for a long time.  THIS is who we are.  We've likely never been the manly man, the well muscled athlete, so we've made the best of what nature gave us... all of it.  And now with growing breasts, again, not by choice, we find ourselves here talking about how best to respond to the situation.  Honestly, I don't see what is wrong with enjoying having breasts since they've been our companions for so long and playing with how to present them.  Personally, I'm not interested in flaunting the fact I have quite lovely breasts but that doesn't stop me from enjoying wearing a sexy brassiere.  That said, I definitely appreciate seeing what other men are doing to accommodate and celebrate the breasts and bodies mother nature has given them.  It is simply dressing and we do it every day.  What we put on our bodies should ideally fit well so we can be comfortable.  If we find what we wear enhances our look, wonderful.  It's nice to feel we look good, for ourselves and the people in our lives.  Enjoy it everyone... breasts and all.  

[Johndoe1]

I ran across a couple of pictures a while back myself. One in high school and one about 25 years ago. In both I was in denial of my chest but it was all there to see. A bra would have actually made a better appearance.

The things you learn too late to really matter in life.

[curiousk]

I'll take the bait and respond about Gary and Dale's pictures, as well as the idea of crossdressing.  Gary and Dale, you both look great dressing in female clothing.  Clearly, hormones have given you a shape that makes women's clothing more comfortable and appropriate to wear.  I believe that all of us who have gynecomastia are under the influence of hormone changes that are out of our control, some more than others at this point in time.  If women's pants and tops fit you better, by all means, wear what fits best. 

For myself, I do not have a female shape.  I'm 5'11" and 260 lbs with an apple shape.  I'm in the process of losing weight.  Right now, I have a large waist, thick thighs with shape, large bust, but my butt and hips are not female in appearance now.  Who knows what will happen over the years.  My physique might become more feminine and would be required to wear more female clothing.  If that's the direction my body takes, it's ok and I'll work with what happens.  I wear a couple of women's t shirts and layering tank tops now.  I'm ok with that.  For now, men's jeans are fine.  They are a bit tricky because of my waist, the jeans can be baggy in the butt and legs.  Maybe after losing inches in my waist, they might fit better.  If not, off to the women's section I'll go.

I can't see myself wearing makeup or dresses, but I think that hormones have a strong hold on us.  You just respond to what the hormones do to your body and act appropriately.  After years of gynecomastia, I finally worked up the courage to begin wearing a bra and wish I would have done it is sooner. 

[Dale Warnio]

42CSurpise!, Johndoe1, and CuriousK,  I think the common theme in what each of you said was that we have all this estrogen flowing through out bodies, and what are we going to do with that.  I believe there is a continuum of masculine and feminine and everyone falls in someplace, and we just happen to be more towards feminine compared to masculine men.  Then it comes down to what we are going to do with it.

What we do is governed by how the estrogen individually affects us, both physically and emotionally, our unique circumstances, and our priorities.  And these change over time.  Johndoe1, you gave a great example of how you were in denial about having breasts like a woman, and if you could go back, you would have started wearing a bra much sooner.  Maybe, even when the girls in your class did?  CuriousK, you are on a diet, and will have to see what your figure looks like afterwards.  42CSurprise!, I like your point that we were given breasts just like women were, but some men work hard to grow breasts.

I guess, to me, it is all perspective and context.  We each have to choose our own paths and hope that path ends up being right for us.

[42CSurprise!]

...For myself, I do not have a female shape.  I'm 5'11" and 260 lbs with an apple shape...

Same here, though I'm shorter and weigh less.  I have fairly broad shoulders but am definitely round in the middle.  I look at Dale's photos and marvel at his feminine shape.  That is not me.  My breasts are real and if I chose to give attention to them they would definitely be noticed.  But I don't always wear a brassiere and my breasts spread a bit on my chest and I always wear a shirt over either a tee shirt or turtleneck.  My preferred shirt is from LL Bean, a canvas shirt with two front pockets with flaps and buttons.  I've worn them for years and even with breast growth over the last year and a half, my development is hidden.

I did buy a women's turtleneck a few years ago simply to get a color I like... men's clothes definitely have the drab thing going on.  When I put it on I realized immediately that my shoulders are too broad for such a garment.  So I'll continue to be a man, continue to cover my breast development AND wear a brassiere when I'm home and when I'm inspired to play... not with crossdressing but with the breasts nature has given me.  I get to do that.

[aboywithgirls]

95 % of what I wear for clothing either comes from the ladies department or ladies clothing store. Torrid is probably my favorite place to shop for clothing.

I know that I am a size 10 in most of their jeans and slacks. I do wear leggings too and I wear a size 0 in them. They have a wide selection of tops and sweaters that can be considered androgynous but, they fit my shoulders, neck, and waist but more important, they fit my chest. There is no way that I can find a men's shirt that can do all that! 

Same goes for my pants. Torrid jeans almost always fit perfectly! I even ended up on the Torrid website last year. One of the SAs who I usually got to took a couple pictures of me in a pair 9f Torrid Bombshell Skinny jeans that I was also trying on a white sheer top with. I had no idea that she sent it to Torrid and they had it up for a few weeks.

[Dale Warnio]

ABWG, would love to see that pic and did you have on any makeup?

[SideSet]

As far as Sephora and boots and dresses, Dale clearly shows the effects of long term high levels of estrogen flowing through his body, and obviously has a female body shape. And quite curvy at that. 

Dale has not talked about or shown anything here to do with Sephora, boots, and dresses, but would probably go through life easier that way than trying and failing to  be masculine, manly, macho.

As blad says, if the bra fits, wear it. 

[Johndoe1]

I think we all agree that we want to look our best. If that means that some of us look better in non traditional men's wear, then that is the way life has dealt us. My own personal case, some women's clothing just fits better beyond a bra. I am wanting to know how to work that into my regular male wardrobe. That doesn't mean I want to cross dress in the classical sense and present as a woman. I want to wear what looks good and feels good on my  body and if the result is more feminine than male, then that is an issue I will have to deal with. Would I have asked to have a  butt load of estrogen dumped into my system? No. But since it is there, it IS effecting my body and my mind and I have to be aware of that and know what and how to deal with its effects. Knowing how to do that in the context of gynecomastia is well within bounds on this site. I believe, those who cross dress can teach us a lot about that. But this is not a cross dressing site per se and I don't think anyone would say it is. But it is a fine line. For whatever its worth. I just want us all to get along. There is too much hatred in the world these days.

[aboywithgirls]

Johndoe,

I am a great example of this. I have been estrogen dominant since puberty. When the guys were growing chest hair and developed muscles, I was growing breasts and rounding out my bottom and thighs.

I tried for several years to try and find men's clothing that actually fit me. It was so much easier for me to walk over to the ladies department or a woman's clothing store and find clothing that fit..

I still have men's work boots and some men's socks and a few other leftovers that I can still wear. I shop Torrid and Soma for mostofmy clothing now. I also have a couple of local boutiques that I use for alot of my Intimates.

[42CSurprise!]

I've mentioned my forays into the world of crossdressing and made reference to some of what I discovered.  I don't doubt there are among those men folks with gynecomastia, but the preponderance seem to be men who need to buy breast forms and other kinds of padding to create a feminine appearance.  A few of them are inspired to transition and they begin with breast enhancement surgery.  I wrote a bit about gynecomastia and the need for wearing a brassiere and the topic was NEVER picked up by anyone.  These folks will talk about dresses, makeup, wigs and many will want to present themselves in public as women.  They have get togethers to party with like minded folks.

I mention all of that to say the men here really are on a different path.  It is the changes in our bodies, that for some go back to puberty that drives this conversation, not first and foremost our desire to present as women.  I imagine the hormone mix we've lived with has affected us in many ways.  This simply IS who we are... each different of course, but all somewhere on the feminine side of the gender continuum.  I certainly haven't reflected on these matters even when confused over my attraction to lingerie and to wearing brassieres, not simply as a functional thing but as a sexual thing.  But looking honestly at my life, I've never been an athlete.  I've always felt more comfortable with women than with men.  I've always loved wearing colors that are very hard to find in the men's aisles.  Yes, I can watch an hour long video of an excavator rescuing another piece of heavy equipment that had submerged in a pond it was dredging, noting the line of men on the shoreline watching as well.  I've replaced engines in my car and done plumbing and electrical work.  I'm good with my hands for which I'm grateful... but I want to wear a brassiere and actually have breasts that are larger than any of the women who've been my lovers over the years.

I know exploring these things can be unsettling, especially for men who are disturbed by the presence of breasts on their chest.  But acceptance is what this side of the website is all about.  I can imagine for the doctors who bought this site some years ago would prefer the men who come to the site will wish to avail themselves of the services they offer.  We may be TOO accepting for them.  But I think we owe it to ourselves to be honest with who we are and what this condition has led to in our lives.  We will be different... I know that.  But even if one lands in a place where he is most comfortable presenting as a woman, so be it.  That is the product of his unique hormone stew, not simply a desire to crossdress.  This is an expression of who that person is... something worth celebrating in my opinion.

[aboywithgirls]

Very well said!

This is certainly how my life has evolved. It really has been a case of " one thing leading to another". Bras led to panties, panties led to slack and jeans, which led to blouses and other ladies tops. It goes on and on from there.

Im not ashamed of where I came from or where I am headed. It's where I want to be. I don't encourage anyone to follow my path. It is certainly not for everyone. It is the right path for me.

[42CSurprise!]

You also have a wife who accepts the whole package that is you.  Granted, you were wearing a brassiere when your courtship began so she knew what she was getting from the beginning.  I tip my hat to you simply because you were able, having lived with the reality of your body and doubtless with the less than kind response you sometimes received, to seek an intimate relationship.  Sometimes our own shame about who we are can stop us cold.

All that said, it will be a challenge for relationships when the breast development happens later in life, after the relationship began.  We read about those situations on the board.  And, of course, the questions about wearing a brassiere during the day, with co-workers, friends and family members.  As we witness today with so much angst about transgender issues, men wearing brassieres is not universally embraced.  It is often seen as perversion.  As I've explored this subject, I've been careful with whom I share what is happening.  And when I am out and about wearing a brassiere I dress to conceal it, not to bring attention to my breasts.  This can be a lonely and confusing journey... but, alas, it is the one we're on.  I'm glad this website exists so we can support one another along the way.

[Dale Warnio]

42CSurprise!, you made such sense and said it so well.  Thank you.  ABWG, I think your circumstances may be unique.