I NEED DO NOTHING

[Grandpa Bambu]

The incidence rates of gyne are far higher amongst Western people.

Gruff....

Where did you come across this interesting fact Dude?

John.

[IlluminaZero]

I can actually back up Gruff's statement a little.

I have heard this idea that Asians in particular are less susceptable to Gynecomastia, and the funny thing is I was reading an article yesterday which glazed over this:

Diet and Genes
By Anne Underwood and Jerry Adler

"What protects Asians (at least the ones who still live in Asia and eat a traditional soy-based diet) from hormone-sensitive breast and prostate tumors?"

I cannot find anything online which directly focuses on ethnicity and how susceptible they are to Gynecomastia, however as I was reading my text that line in particular caught my attention.

Ugh, I'm half Asian and drink Soy Milk on a daily basis! WRRRYYYYY!?!?!?

[IAmNotABody]

Thank you all for the replies. I know you have much passion about what you feel and express to me and all else. That said, I will reply as I feel impelled.

Gruff wrote, "
Firstly, no I didn't hate myself when I had gyne. I found the condition to be miserable and restrictive."

So you did not hate yourself? Only the condition? How do you know the condition did not bring out of you your hate for yourself, the very hate you claim is for the condition and not for yourself? You say you found the condition miserable. Okay. So was it love for yourself that enabled you to constantly think miserable thoughts about your condition? If you did not hate yourself then why harbor misery and restrictions? It seems you think you deserve misery and restrictions, which you punish yourself for dutifully. If you did not harbor misery and restrictions, then you would never have sought surgery.

Gruff wrote, "no-one wants to go to a beach, or a swimming pool, or wear a t-shirt out and about and have boobs jiggling around."

So you revealed that you do hate yourself enough to fuel restrictive thoughts about what you and everyone else should want. You restrict yourself. Stop blaming your body for what YOU, Gruffy, think ABOUT your body.


Gruff wrote, " It's also not always about being ridiculed, I never was. It's about freedom. The freedom to feel comfortable with our bodies in public and private."

You never were ridiculed? Do you not ridicule yourself into not feeling open enough to wear whatever clothes you want? You know nothing about Freedom. You talk about the 'freedom' to feel comfortable with your body in public and private while YOU are the one placing yourself in prison and then expect surgery to be your midnight call from the governor.

Gruff wrote, " Anyway, are you honestly saying your happy to walk shirtless on a beach? Are you happy to say no thankyou to offers from friends to go swimming, clubbing, go on vacation? Maybe you truly have accepted the condition, i don't think so but let's say you have. However, accepting the condition is one thing, feeling confident in yourself to ask girls out, be bold and charasmatic, and be the better person you could be is another. Just how far have you come? "

Good question. I am glad you asked.  Several months ago I began wearing just one single T-shirt out in public. Now, I live in Arizona where it can boil to 111 degrees Fahrenheit! I used to wear two T-shirts and perhaps  a button down the middle shirt to hide my condition. But several months ago, I grabbed ONE T-shirt and went about my day WITHOUT even realizing the magnitude of what I was doing. It was only during the day that I realized, "Wow, I am only wearing ONE shirt. That is surprising." No anxiety . No planning.

I traveled to the Florida Keys for my sister's wedding. I removed my shirt and walked all over that beach! I walked  in front of beautiful girls, old people, young people, everyone. I jogged on the beach in front of everyone. I went jetskiing. For years I avoided all activity necessitating the removal of my shirt, or layers of shirts. Not anymore.

I feel MORE confident, charismatic, and bold NOW. I have said to myself many times, "Well, if I can deal with this, what can I NOT deal with? If this cannot stop me, then WHAT can??" I feel MORE comfortable with girls than ever! I never thought that I could ever say that, honestly. But it is true. And I CAN say it because I know gyne is NOT a problem to overcome but a lesson from the Universe to accept-- and in that, there is no more misery, no more anxiety, no more restrictions. I say what I want to whatever girl I want. As a matter of fact, a girl told me she thought it was natural for me to just be confident. She had no idea what kind of intense innerwork I had been involved with for over 5 years.

It is ironic that the very conditon that I was convinced could only restrict me set me free. And everyday is another opportunity for release.

[manic91m9]

i would just like to say that is completely unfair to judge somone for wanting to have the surgery to remove their gyno. its a hard step to take and isnt "the easy way out" but the smart way out if you can afford it and is worth it to you.. why shouldnt you change somthing about yourself if you can? because it is vain to have surgery.. yes it is a generaly a superficial condition but if you hadn't noticed looks mean alot in this world. the way somone looks effects the way you think about them that is a fact and you can not change it. gyno is somthing that is not worth changing to some people because they are comfortable with the way they look and that is good for them. i dont understand why people are anti surgery? the theory that you are how you are because you are meant to be that way is just wrong. what if you were horrificaly scarred by burns. should you just accept it and move on? if you could it would be great. but not if you go around knowing that people know about it and consider you less attractive. if you want the surgery DO IT. and just because u dont want the surgery dont think less of people for chosing to be free of that burden surgicaly.

[IAmNotABody]

Thanks Juice for the reply.


You wrote, "Realize though that everyone isn't the same and your results can't necessarily be generalized for everyone else.  People are different. "

This is a defense AGAINST participating in your own release. This is a symptom of 'my truth' syndrome. We all want to make ourselves different. We all want an easy way out. I know I do. But there is no easy way out; there is only the arduous BUT liberating innerwork. A thousand compromises will be attempted, but none will work.

No. I no longer smoke, eat, cannabis products.

[IAmNotABody]

Thanks manic for the reply.

You wrote, " i would just like to say that is completely unfair to judge somone for wanting to have the surgery to remove their gyno."

Well, did you not judge them in order to offer that statement? Who told you life is fair? Perhaps only fairness exists regardless of our thoughts to the contrary.

[IAmNotABody]

Thanks for the reply, Gruff.


You wrote, " ...Thinking a life of suffering will reward you with riches such as enhanced understanding that only one who has suffered for so long can understand. "

You are not worthy of YOUR suffering, Gruff. You have no idea of what release is. When was the last time you cried like a baby? Probably too much of a 'man' to allow that for yourself, huh? After all your tempertantrums, you still have not moved an inch toward your release from hating yourself. You do not like the way I talk to you because you cannot stand YOURSELF.


You also wrote, "Say to hell with it. I'd rather not have these boobs and get them removed."

You may have the perceived shortcoming removed, but the anguish ABOUT them remains unaltered. You are full of sham and guilt about yourself. You imprison yourself and expect someone else to release you. Well, that is not going to happen. The Universe is not going to pander to your selfish desires, mate. You are not ready for release from your much beloved self-hate. And your lessons of pain are not over. You have made a request to the Universe--whether you realize it or not--and the Help for which you ask is offered through me. Still, you have much more pain to endure before you can allow yourself to unlearn the restricting lessons your have taught your mind.

[Hypo-is-here]

Choosing to live with a problem such as this is very difficult for most and so they cannot possibly understand how it can be done without surgery

And yet some people do manage to  live with the problem, some really well, some with more problems, some fooling themselves to a certain extent- true, but all the same they get by.

All of us here have suffered, we wouldn't be here otherwise.

No matter what/how we have chosen or managed to cope with gynecomastia- this is a support group.

This group has been here to shield us, to give us a voice no matter how much pain or difficulty we have in expressing our issues- to allow us to gain help from fellow sufferers...A shoulder from the cold.

So in light of this and the purpose of this site and why we are here...

Is it right to mock those who have chosen a different option to ourselves irrespective of their use of language or other minutia?

Those who critisize an individual for having surgery or opting not to have surgery to my mind breach the ethos of this site and have NO place here.

So agree or not agree, to every one of you that has judged this man in a negative vain.

SHAME!

SHAME ON YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Worrier]

everyone has a right to comment on 'iam not a body's choice' just as  'iam not a body' has  a right to post what he feels is a way to deal with this condition. this is a  forum.

I don't agree with what he is saying though . In todays society your appearance means so much for both men and women. I don't think the op's position is realistic in todays climate. for example there was a poll done on employers in the uk saying they would discriminate against fat people as they want pretty, dynamic people in their workplace. So many programes on tv about people striving to change their appearance.
       Everyone on fad diets even though most don't work. I admire at where the op says he has got to and maybe in different times what people have between their ears would count for more but it is not like that.
       iam sure the op knows that most on this site want to get rid of there boobs whether that is by surgery , diet exercise meds or whatever so he must realise that alot of people will be mystified by his position. :-/

[RottonDane]

First off let me say that I do not think that anyone here has a problem with his different opinion, but in the way he seem to damn those who CHOICE is to have them removed via surgery.  I would have to say that it is an admireable thing to not care what society thinks of your body but to be true to ones self, and on that point everyone here would comend him.  How ever he has to realize that not everyone with this problem hates themselves, hates others, and lives a life of misery and distain.  I have members of my family that have terrable gyne and couldent give a care less, and I also know men who genderbend, that have had them removed.  The fact is its a PERSONEL CHOICE not a pulpet, so preach to those who want to hear your message and not to those who would rather not.  My thoughts however leave me to ask Iamnotabody a few questions, not to cast judgement, but to understand.  Do you have a strong religous pull?  Have you ever been treated for mental dissorders or put on medication dealing with depression or anti-psycotics?  Were you made to feel like a lesser human in your develemental years?  I ask these questions not to cast judgement or to make fun, and none of them were asked with malice in my heart or mind I just am looking for that missing piece of this puzzle.  I apollogise for my spelling, I am trying not to use spell check anymore and trying to learn to spell for myself, like we all use to have to do...

[silly_guy]

IAmNotABody,

I figured it out.  You developed gynecomastia from smoking so much d**n weed.  

Stop coming to this board high.

lol

Anyways, aren't some of you being a little harsh calling the original poster an idiot?

I do disagree with his philosophy as applied to myself, but if it works for others then yay for them.

[Hypo-is-here]

People can disagree with the man and in strong terms without mocking him.

How does it help to mock?

If someone is replying to him, surely it is with the aim of helping?

If not and it is just to disagree then at least do it in civilized terms instead of those of a smart ass?

This is a support group at the end of the day.

I am not being unreasonable, just saying you can disagree in a better less hurtful way, in a respectful way.

Even if he has said something that you don't like two wrongs don't make a right.

And if you listen to him he has had a lot to contend with, I don't think giving him hassle with help at all.

Hey if it was me I would just have the surgery and not have to think of such things but it takes all sorts.

P.S

I'm not arguing with you Gruff those days are long gone; I don't waste my time having semantical arguments with aggressive unreasonable young men anymore.

[Vizia]

William Wallace: Aye, fight and you may die, run, and you'll live... at least a while. And dying in your beds, many years from now, would you be willin' to trade ALL the days, from this day to that, for one chance, just one chance, to come back here and tell our enemies that they may take away our lives, but they'll never take... OUR FREEDOM!
[Crowd cheers]

[kicka]

wicked posts! im reminded of hanibal lecter of silence of the lambs! sorry this isnt very constructional just had to say it

... carry on  

[PostOpHappy]

This is very fight-club esque; it's almost a nihilistic approach of looking at having a 'solveable' condition, which is odd.  Actually, I take that back -- this is somewhat of an absurdist approach at looking at something with a solution.  You see that a solution exists yet you neglect to do it because you feel it is unsolveable?  So from a nihilistic standpoint you feel as if there is no purpose to solve it, and as an absurdist you search for a reason to bear with it so as to keep you going?


This is fairly amusing, I'm really into philosophy and psychology as well.  I'm currently working on a minor in psychology.

I don't know if many of you read, but have any of you read Catch 22?  Protective rationalization at its best?

Or...